Do you know what is really laughable? Vanity is hilarious, because just as soon as you think you are looking good and sexy and worthy of the cover of People magazine, along comes a life lesson to make you realize that beauty really is in the eyes of the beholder, and what is on the outside is not nearly as important as what is on the inside.
最近我遇到一位澳大利亚的盲眼小女孩，我们一起参加一项叫作“乐跑”的活动，为贫穷的孩子募集医疗设备。这个女孩大约五岁，活动结束后，她妈妈介绍她跟我认识，并向她解释我生来没有手也没有脚。
Recently I met a young Australian girl who is blind. We were doing a Fun Run to raise money to provide medical equipment for needy kids. This girl was about five years old. Her mum introduced her to me after the event. The mother explained to her that I'd been born with no arms and no legs.
盲眼的朋友通常会要求碰触我的身体，好了解没有四肢是什么模样。我不介意，所以当这个女孩问她妈妈可不可以让她自己“看看”是怎么回事时，我同意了。她妈妈牵着她的手从我的肩膀摸起，一直摸到我的小左脚。小女孩的反应很有趣，当她碰到我空荡荡的肩窝和奇怪的小左脚时，显得很平静;然后，当她把手放到我脸上时，她尖叫了起来!
Blind people sometimes ask to touch my body so they can comprehend what someone without limbs is like. I don't mind it, so when this girl asked her mother if she could "see" for herself, I gave permission. Her mum guided her hand over my shoulders and over my little left foot. The girl's reaction was interesting. She was very calm as she felt my empty shoulder sockets and my strange little foot. Then when she put her hands on my face, she screamed!
这也太好笑了吧。
It was hilarious.
“怎么了，我长太帅吓到你了吗?”我笑着问道。
"What? My beautiful face scares you?" I asked, laughing.
“不是了!你怎么都是毛?你是狼吗?”
"No! It's that hair all over you! Are you a wolf?"
她从来没摸过络腮胡，所以摸到我的胡子时，她吓坏了。她跟她妈妈说，我脸上有这么多毛还真可怜。对于什么叫作有魅力，这个女孩有她自己的想法——我的胡子显然不是她的菜。我倒不会生气，反而很高兴再次被提醒：美是由观者的眼睛和触摸所定义的。
She had never felt a beard before. When she touched my stubble, she freaked out. She told her mother that it was sad I was so hairy! This girl had her own idea of what was attractive, and obviously my beard was not on the list. I wasn't offended. I was glad to be reminded that beauty is definitely in the eyes—and touch—of the beholder.
