Look at all these people just sitting here and not tipping, working on their computers.

瞧瞧这些人，也不给小费，就会坐在那里啪啪啪地玩电脑。

This guy has a brand-new Apple.

这家伙有一台全新的苹果电脑。

I've been eating the same apple for a week. I blame Steve Jobs.

而老娘同一个苹果啃了快一周。都怪史蒂夫·乔布斯。

These people are more like Steve-I-have-no-jobs. All right, that's it.

这些人更像是"史蒂夫·没工作吧"。好吧，真是够了。

Earl, I need to get the wireless router.

厄尔，给我无线路由器。

Oh, is that what this is? I thought it was a cookie-warmer.

原来那玩意是干这个的啊？我还以为是饼干加热器呢。

Attention deadbeat diners.

听着，你们这些蹭网客

You can't just sit here all night and only order coffee. This is not a Starbucks.

你们不能点杯咖啡，就赖一整晚。这又不是星巴克。

And I know that because we don't sell Norah Jones cds or bananas.

而且一看我们这里不卖诺拉·琼斯的CD或是香蕉就知道。

This is the router for the free wi-fi.

这是能提供无线网络的路由器。

And that is a waitress who needs to make some tips.

而这位是需要挣点小费的服务员。

Seriously, guys, I need actual cash. This guy just offered to pay me in ideas.

说真的，伙计们，我要的是钞票。那家伙居然想用创意来付账。

If I pull this plug, the internet will go down.

如果我拔掉这个插头，网络就会没掉。

And you -- that sad email you're in the middle of writing to your ex-boyfriend,

而你，写给前男友的可怜兮兮电邮会没掉，

the one you shouldn't send anyway--gone.

反正你也不应该发给他。

And you -- That vaguely pornographic anime film you've been illegally downloading for the past three hours-gone.

而你，花费了三小时非法下载的色情动漫，也会没掉。

And you--that screenplay you've been writing,

而你，埋头写的破剧本，

you can keep working on it, but we all know how it ends:

你可以继续写，不过我们都知道结局

with you moving back in with your mother.

就是你搬回去跟你老妈住。

Now, who's gonna order?

现在谁想点餐呀

Great, I'll go get some menus. Here, Caroline, put this back.

很好，我去拿菜单。给，卡洛琳，把这个放回去。

Ooh, my cookie-warmer.

可惜了我的饼干加热器。