Don’t Lower Your Standards
Today I’m going to talk about what it’s like being single for a long time, and how to actually develop yourself so that you can finally find someone good for you.
Alright, so how do you do this?
Well, I was single for 4 and a half years, and my brother, Jason, in America, has been single for 12 years, and he’s almost 31!
So what happens during this time that you’re single? Well, you probably already know, but eventually you start to lose your confidence. You start to feel like you’re not good, you’re a bad person, and nobody could possible ever love you because of whatever reason or excuse you inevitably tell yourself.
I don’t know what your feelings were/are, but for me I began to wonder why I couldn’t find someone to be with, as I’m a good guy, I’ve been improving myself and doing everything I can to become a good potential husband and father, and yet I can’t find anybody good, nobody will love me. There’s gotta be something wrong with me, maybe I’m just crazy, I don’t know.
The thing is, once you get to this stage in your single life, you’re going to possibly drop your standards. You might have thought before, “I want someone who’s smart and beautiful and sexy and..” Everybody thinks that way, but the reality is, most of us never find that person.
The most important thing is maintaining your standards, maybe you want someone who’s 25-30, 1.65-1.80 meters tall, who isn’t too fat, and speaks two languages and has a business. It’s okay to have your standards, it’s okay to be picky, because you know what you want, and if you don’t find somebody who fits those standards, that’s OKAY because you WILL find somebody SOMEDAY.
People always used to say to me the same thing, “YOU WILL, YOU WILL find somebody, I promise, I swear!”
It took me almost 5 years, but you know what, I found that person. I never lowered my standards, and I finally found that person, because when you’re single, especially if you haven’t had sex for a long time, you begin to FEEL desperate, and people can FEEL your DESPERATION, they can feel you’re unhappy and not confident. That makes them feel like you’re not somebody they want to be in a relationship with.
The only way you’re going to attract somebody to be in a relationship is if you are strong, confident, outgoing, social, happy, you can communicate with people well, I know, I’ve been there, I’ve felt the negativity in my life. The only way I was able to change myself and find that person who made me happy was to be positive, and to continue being positive I had to go out and be social and make myself meet more people and talk to more people.
At the same time, at home I learned more about Psychology, I majored in Psychology, but that doesn’t matter, because I took the time to learn more about how I wanted to be and what I believed somebody would want me to be, how a woman would want me to make her happy in a relationship. I learned about those things, and I became that person, and I’m going to teach you how to be that way to in my future videos.
So, before we end this post, the most important things to re-stress are:
1) Don’t lose your confidence.
2) Don’t become a negative person.
3) Don’t lower your standards.
I hope this has been very helpful for you, and I hope that you can find somebody SOON!
There’s one last thing I’d like you to do for yourself: First comment below and tell me how long you have been single for, what kind of person you are looking for, and what your life has been like as a single person. Go on, you can write in English or Chinese!
Then, share this with two of your single friends, because you don’t want any of them to be single and miserable and unhappy! It’s time that we help our friends find love and happiness!
