安徒生童话04THE SHOES OF FORTUNE幸运的套鞋
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    I. A Beginning

    Every author has some peculiarity in his descriptions or in his style of
    writing. Those who do not like him, magnify it, shrug up their shoulders, and
    exclaim--there he is again! I, for my part, know very well how I can bring
    about this movement and this exclamation. It would happen immediately if I
    were to begin here, as I intended to do, with: "Rome has its Corso, Naples its
    Toledo"--"Ah! that Andersen; there he is again!" they would cry; yet I must,
    to please my fancy, continue quite quietly, and add: "But Copenhagen has its
    East Street."

    Here, then, we will stay for the present. In one of the houses not far from
    the new market a party was invited--a very large party, in order, as is often
    the case, to get a return invitation from the others. One half of the company
    was already seated at the card-table, the other half awaited the result of the
    stereotype preliminary observation of the lady of the house:

    "Now let us see what we can do to amuse ourselves."

    They had got just so far, and the conversation began to crystallise, as it
    could but do with the scanty stream which the commonplace world supplied.
    Amongst other things they spoke of the middle ages: some praised that period
    as far more interesting, far more poetical than our own too sober present;
    indeed Councillor Knap defended this opinion so warmly, that the hostess
    declared immediately on his side, and both exerted themselves with unwearied
    eloquence. The Councillor boldly declared the time of King Hans to be the
    noblest and the most happy period.*

    * A.D. 1482-1513


    While the conversation turned on this subject, and was only for a moment
    interrupted by the arrival of a journal that contained nothing worth reading,
    we will just step out into the antechamber, where cloaks, mackintoshes,
    sticks, umbrellas, and shoes, were deposited. Here sat two female figures, a
    young and an old one. One might have thought at first they were servants come
    to accompany their mistresses home; but on looking nearer, one soon saw they
    could scarcely be mere servants; their forms were too noble for that, their
    skin too fine, the cut of their dress too striking. Two fairies were they; the
    younger, it is true, was not Dame Fortune herself, but one of the
    waiting-maids of her handmaidens who carry about the lesser good things that
    she distributes; the other looked extremely gloomy--it was Care. She always
    attends to her own serious business herself, as then she is sure of having it
    done properly.

    They were telling each other, with a confidential interchange of ideas, where
    they had been during the day. The messenger of Fortune had only executed a few
    unimportant commissions, such as saving a new bonnet from a shower of rain,
    etc.; but what she had yet to perform was something quite unusual.

    "I must tell you," said she, "that to-day is my birthday; and in honor of it,
    a pair of walking-shoes or galoshes has been entrusted to me, which I am to
    carry to mankind. These shoes possess the property of instantly transporting
    him who has them on to the place or the period in which he most wishes to be;
    every wish, as regards time or place, or state of being, will be immediately
    fulfilled, and so at last man will be happy, here below."

    "Do you seriously believe it?" replied Care, in a severe tone of reproach.
    "No; he will be very unhappy, and will assuredly bless the moment when he
    feels that he has freed himself from the fatal shoes."

    "Stupid nonsense!" said the other angrily. "I will put them here by the door.
    Some one will make a mistake for certain and take the wrong ones--he will be a
    happy man."

    Such was their conversation.


    II. What Happened to the Councillor

    It was late; Councillor Knap, deeply occupied with the times of King Hans,
    intended to go home, and malicious Fate managed matters so that his feet,
    instead of finding their way to his own galoshes, slipped into those of
    Fortune. Thus caparisoned the good man walked out of the well-lighted rooms
    into East Street. By the magic power of the shoes he was carried back to the
    times of King Hans; on which account his foot very naturally sank in the mud
    and puddles of the street, there having been in those days no pavement in
    Copenhagen.

    "Well! This is too bad! How dirty it is here!" sighed the Councillor. "As to a
    pavement, I can find no traces of one, and all the lamps, it seems, have gone
    to sleep."

    The moon was not yet very high; it was besides rather foggy, so that in the
    darkness all objects seemed mingled in chaotic confusion. At the next corner
    hung a votive lamp before a Madonna, but the light it gave was little better
    than none at all; indeed, he did not observe it before he was exactly under
    it, and his eyes fell upon the bright colors of the pictures which represented
    the well-known group of the Virgin and the infant Jesus.

    "That is probably a wax-work show," thought he; "and the people delay taking
    down their sign in hopes of a late visitor or two."

    A few persons in the costume of the time of King Hans passed quickly by him.

    "How strange they look! The good folks come probably from a masquerade!"

    Suddenly was heard the sound of drums and fifes; the bright blaze of a fire
    shot up from time to time, and its ruddy gleams seemed to contend with the
    bluish light of the torches. The Councillor stood still, and watched a most
    strange procession pass by. First came a dozen drummers, who understood pretty
    well how to handle their instruments; then came halberdiers, and some armed
    with cross-bows. The principal person in the procession was a priest.
    Astonished at what he saw, the Councillor asked what was the meaning of
    all this mummery, and who that man was.

    "That's the Bishop of Zealand," was the answer.

    "Good Heavens! What has taken possession of the Bishop?" sighed the
    Councillor, shaking his head. It certainly could not be the Bishop; even
    though he was considered the most absent man in the whole kingdom, and people
    told the drollest anecdotes about him. Reflecting on the matter, and without
    looking right or left, the Councillor went through East Street and across the
    Habro-Platz. The bridge leading to Palace Square was not to be found; scarcely
    trusting his senses, the nocturnal wanderer discovered a shallow piece of
    water, and here fell in with two men who very comfortably were rocking to and
    fro in a boat.

    "Does your honor want to cross the ferry to the Holme?" asked they.

    "Across to the Holme!" said the Councillor, who knew nothing of the age in
    which he at that moment was. "No, I am going to Christianshafen, to Little
    Market Street."

    Both men stared at him in astonishment.

    "Only just tell me where the bridge is," said he. "It is really unpardonable
    that there are no lamps here; and it is as dirty as if one had to wade through
    a morass."

    The longer he spoke with the boatmen, the more unintelligible did their
    language become to him.

    "I don't understand your Bornholmish dialect," said he at last, angrily, and
    turning his back upon them. He was unable to find the bridge: there was no
    railway either. "It is really disgraceful what a state this place is in,"
    muttered he to himself. Never had his age, with which, however, he was always
    grumbling, seemed so miserable as on this evening. "I'll take a
    hackney-coach!" thought he. But where were the hackney-coaches? Not one
    was to be seen.

    "I must go back to the New Market; there, it is to be hoped, I shall find some
    coaches; for if I don't, I shall never get safe to Christianshafen."

    So off he went in the direction of East Street, and had nearly got to the end
    of it when the moon shone forth.

    "God bless me! What wooden scaffolding is that which they have set up there?"
    cried he involuntarily, as he looked at East Gate, which, in those days, was
    at the end of East Street.

    He found, however, a little side-door open, and through this he went, and
    stepped into our New Market of the present time. It was a huge desolate plain;
    some wild bushes stood up here and there, while across the field flowed a
    broad canal or river. Some wretched hovels for the Dutch sailors, resembling
    great boxes, and after which the place was named, lay about in confused
    disorder on the opposite bank.

    "I either behold a fata morgana, or I am regularly tipsy," whimpered out the
    Councillor. "But what's this?"

    He turned round anew, firmly convinced that he was seriously ill. He gazed at
    the street formerly so well known to him, and now so strange in appearance,
    and looked at the houses more attentively: most of them were of wood, slightly
    put together; and many had a thatched roof.

    "No--I am far from well," sighed he; "and yet I drank only one glass of punch;
    but I cannot suppose it--it was, too, really very wrong to give us punch and
    hot salmon for supper. I shall speak about it at the first opportunity. I have
    half a mind to go back again, and say what I suffer. But no, that would be too
    silly; and Heaven only knows if they are up still."

    He looked for the house, but it had vanished.

    "It is really dreadful," groaned he with increasing anxiety; "I cannot
    recognise East Street again; there is not a single decent shop from one end to
    the other! Nothing but wretched huts can I see anywhere; just as if I were at
    Ringstead. Oh! I am ill! I can scarcely bear myself any longer. Where the
    deuce can the house be? It must be here on this very spot; yet there is not
    the slightest idea of resemblance, to such a degree has everything changed
    this night! At all events here are some people up and stirring. Oh! oh! I am
    certainly very ill."

    He now hit upon a half-open door, through a chink of which a faint light
    shone. It was a sort of hostelry of those times; a kind of public-house. The
    room had some resemblance to the clay-floored halls in Holstein; a pretty
    numerous company, consisting of seamen, Copenhagen burghers, and a few
    scholars, sat here in deep converse over their pewter cans, and gave little
    heed to the person who entered.

    "By your leave!" said the Councillor to the Hostess, who came bustling towards
    him. "I've felt so queer all of a sudden; would you have the goodness to send
    for a hackney-coach to take me to Christianshafen?"

    The woman examined him with eyes of astonishment, and shook her head; she then
    addressed him in German. The Councillor thought she did not understand Danish,
    and therefore repeated his wish in German. This, in connection with his
    costume, strengthened the good woman in the belief that he was a foreigner.
    That he was ill, she comprehended directly; so she brought him a pitcher of
    water, which tasted certainly pretty strong of the sea, although it had been
    fetched from the well.

    The Councillor supported his head on his hand, drew a long breath, and thought
    over all the wondrous things he saw around him.

    "Is this the Daily News of this evening?" he asked mechanically, as he saw the
    Hostess push aside a large sheet of paper.

    The meaning of this councillorship query remained, of course, a riddle to her,
    yet she handed him the paper without replying. It was a coarse wood-cut,
    representing a splendid meteor "as seen in the town of Cologne," which was to
    be read below in bright letters.

    "That is very old!" said the Councillor, whom this piece of antiquity began to
    make considerably more cheerful. "Pray how did you come into possession of
    this rare print? It is extremely interesting, although the whole is a mere
    fable. Such meteorous appearances are to be explained in this way--that they
    are the reflections of the Aurora Borealis, and it is highly probable they are
    caused principally by electricity."

    Those persons who were sitting nearest him and heard his speech, stared at him
    in wonderment; and one of them rose, took off his hat respectfully, and said
    with a serious countenance, "You are no doubt a very learned man, Monsieur."

    "Oh no," answered the Councillor, "I can only join in conversation on this
    topic and on that, as indeed one must do according to the demands of the world
    at present."

    "Modestia is a fine virtue," continued the gentleman; "however, as to your
    speech, I must say mihi secus videtur: yet I am willing to suspend my
    judicium."

    "May I ask with whom I have the pleasure of speaking?" asked the Councillor.

    "I am a Bachelor in Theologia," answered the gentleman with a stiff reverence.

    This reply fully satisfied the Councillor; the title suited the dress. "He is
    certainly," thought he, "some village schoolmaster--some queer old fellow,
    such as one still often meets with in Jutland."

    "This is no locus docendi, it is true," began the clerical gentleman; "yet I
    beg you earnestly to let us profit by your learning. Your reading in the
    ancients is, sine dubio, of vast extent?"

    "Oh yes, I've read something, to be sure," replied the Councillor. "I like
    reading all useful works; but I do not on that account despise the modern
    ones; 'tis only the unfortunate 'Tales of Every-day Life' that I cannot
    bear--we have enough and more than enough such in reality."

    "'Tales of Every-day Life?'" said our Bachelor inquiringly.

    "I mean those new fangled novels, twisting and writhing themselves in the dust
    of commonplace, which also expect to find a reading public."

    "Oh," exclaimed the clerical gentleman smiling, "there is much wit in them;
    besides they are read at court. The King likes the history of Sir Iffven and
    Sir Gaudian particularly, which treats of King Arthur, and his Knights of the
    Round Table; he has more than once joked about it with his high vassals."

    "I have not read that novel," said the Councillor; "it must be quite a new
    one, that Heiberg has published lately."

    "No," answered the theologian of the time of King Hans: "that book is not
    written by a Heiberg, but was imprinted by Godfrey von Gehmen."

    "Oh, is that the author's name?" said the Councillor. "It is a very old name,
    and, as well as I recollect, he was the first printer that appeared in
    Denmark."

    "Yes, he is our first printer," replied the clerical gentleman hastily.

    So far all went on well. Some one of the worthy burghers now spoke of the
    dreadful pestilence that had raged in the country a few years back, meaning
    that of 1484. The Councillor imagined it was the cholera that was meant, which
    people made so much fuss about; and the discourse passed off satisfactorily
    enough. The war of the buccaneers of 1490 was so recent that it could not fail
    being alluded to; the English pirates had, they said, most shamefully taken
    their ships while in the roadstead; and the Councillor, before whose eyes the
    Herostratic* event of 1801 still floated vividly, agreed entirely with the
    others in abusing the rascally English. With other topics he was not so
    fortunate; every moment brought about some new confusion, and threatened to
    become a perfect Babel; for the worthy Bachelor was really too ignorant, and
    the simplest observations of the Councillor sounded to him too daring and
    phantastical. They looked at one another from the crown of the head to the
    soles of the feet; and when matters grew to too high a pitch, then the
    Bachelor talked Latin, in the hope of being better understood--but it was of
    no use after all.

    * Herostratus, or Eratostratus--an Ephesian, who wantonly set fire to the
    famous temple of Diana, in order to commemorate his name by so uncommon an
    action.


    "What's the matter?" asked the Hostess, plucking the Councillor by the sleeve;
    and now his recollection returned, for in the course of the conversation he
    had entirely forgotten all that had preceded it.

    "Merciful God, where am I!" exclaimed he in agony; and while he so thought,
    all his ideas and feelings of overpowering dizziness, against which he
    struggled with the utmost power of desperation, encompassed him with renewed
    force. "Let us drink claret and mead, and Bremen beer," shouted one of the
    guests--"and you shall drink with us!"

    Two maidens approached. One wore a cap of two staring colors, denoting the
    class of persons to which she belonged. They poured out the liquor, and made
    the most friendly gesticulations; while a cold perspiration trickled down the
    back of the poor Councillor.

    "What's to be the end of this! What's to become of me!" groaned he; but he was
    forced, in spite of his opposition, to drink with the rest. They took hold of
    the worthy man; who, hearing on every side that he was intoxicated, did not in
    the least doubt the truth of this certainly not very polite assertion; but on
    the contrary, implored the ladies and gentlemen present to procure him a
    hackney-coach: they, however, imagined he was talking Russian.

    Never before, he thought, had he been in such a coarse and ignorant company;
    one might almost fancy the people had turned heathens again. "It is the most
    dreadful moment of my life: the whole world is leagued against me!" But
    suddenly it occurred to him that he might stoop down under the table, and then
    creep unobserved out of the door. He did so; but just as he was going, the
    others remarked what he was about; they laid hold of him by the legs; and now,
    happily for him, off fell his fatal shoes--and with them the charm was at an
    end.

    The Councillor saw quite distinctly before him a lantern burning, and behind
    this a large handsome house. All seemed to him in proper order as usual; it
    was East Street, splendid and elegant as we now see it. He lay with his feet
    towards a doorway, and exactly opposite sat the watchman asleep.

    "Gracious Heaven!" said he. "Have I lain here in the street and dreamed? Yes;
    'tis East Street! How splendid and light it is! But really it is terrible
    what an effect that one glass of punch must have had on me!"

    Two minutes later, he was sitting in a hackney-coach and driving to
    Frederickshafen. He thought of the distress and agony he had endured, and
    praised from the very bottom of his heart the happy reality--our own
    time--which, with all its deficiencies, is yet much better than that in which,
    so much against his inclination, he had lately been.


    III. The Watchman's Adventure

    "Why, there is a pair of galoshes, as sure as I'm alive!" said the watchman,
    awaking from a gentle slumber. "They belong no doubt to the lieutenant who
    lives over the way. They lie close to the door."

    The worthy man was inclined to ring and deliver them at the house, for there
    was still a light in the window; but he did not like disturbing the other
    people in their beds, and so very considerately he left the matter alone.

    "Such a pair of shoes must be very warm and comfortable," said he; "the
    leather is so soft and supple." They fitted his feet as though they had been
    made for him. "'Tis a curious world we live in," continued he, soliloquizing.
    "There is the lieutenant, now, who might go quietly to bed if he chose, where
    no doubt he could stretch himself at his ease; but does he do it? No; he
    saunters up and down his room, because, probably, he has enjoyed too many of
    the good things of this world at his dinner. That's a happy fellow! He has
    neither an infirm mother, nor a whole troop of everlastingly hungry children
    to torment him. Every evening he goes to a party, where his nice supper costs
    him nothing: would to Heaven I could but change with him! How happy should I
    be!"

    While expressing his wish, the charm of the shoes, which he had put on, began
    to work; the watchman entered into the being and nature of the lieutenant. He
    stood in the handsomely furnished apartment, and held between his fingers a
    small sheet of rose-colored paper, on which some verses were written--written
    indeed by the officer himself; for who has not, at least once in his life,
    had a lyrical moment? And if one then marks down one's thoughts, poetry is
    produced. But here was written:

      OH, WERE I RICH!

    "Oh, were I rich! Such was my wish, yea such
     When hardly three feet high, I longed for much.
      Oh, were I rich! an officer were I,
      With sword, and uniform, and plume so high.
      And the time came, and officer was I!
    But yet I grew not rich. Alas, poor me!
    Have pity, Thou, who all man's wants dost see.

       "I sat one evening sunk in dreams of bliss,
     A maid of seven years old gave me a kiss,
      I at that time was rich in poesy
      And tales of old, though poor as poor could be;
      But all she asked for was this poesy.
    Then was I rich, but not in gold, poor me!
    As Thou dost know, who all men's hearts canst see.

       "Oh, were I rich! Oft asked I for this boon.
     The child grew up to womanhood full soon.
      She is so pretty, clever, and so kind
    Oh, did she know what's hidden in my mind--
      A tale of old. Would she to me were kind!
    But I'm condemned to silence! oh, poor me!
    As Thou dost know, who all men's hearts canst see.

       "Oh, were I rich in calm and peace of mind,
     My grief you then would not here written find!
      O thou, to whom I do my heart devote,
      Oh read this page of glad days now remote,
      A dark, dark tale, which I tonight devote!
    Dark is the future now. Alas, poor me!
    Have pity Thou, who all men's pains dost see."

    Such verses as these people write when they are in love! But no man in his
    senses ever thinks of printing them. Here one of the sorrows of life, in which
    there is real poetry, gave itself vent; not that barren grief which the poet
    may only hint at, but never depict in its detail--misery and want: that animal
    necessity, in short, to snatch at least at a fallen leaf of the bread-fruit
    tree, if not at the fruit itself. The higher the position in which one finds
    oneself transplanted, the greater is the suffering. Everyday necessity is the
    stagnant pool of life--no lovely picture reflects itself therein. Lieutenant,
    love, and lack of money--that is a symbolic triangle, or much the same as the
    half of the shattered die of Fortune. This the lieutenant felt most
    poignantly, and this was the reason he leant his head against the window, and
    sighed so deeply.

    "The poor watchman out there in the street is far happier than I. He knows not
    what I term privation. He has a home, a wife, and children, who weep with him
    over his sorrows, who rejoice with him when he is glad. Oh, far happier were
    I, could I exchange with him my being--with his desires and with his hopes
    perform the weary pilgrimage of life! Oh, he is a hundred times happier than
    I!"

    In the same moment the watchman was again watchman. It was the shoes that
    caused the metamorphosis by means of which, unknown to himself, he took upon
    him the thoughts and feelings of the officer; but, as we have just seen, he
    felt himself in his new situation much less contented, and now preferred the
    very thing which but some minutes before he had rejected. So then the watchman
    was again watchman.

    "That was an unpleasant dream," said he; "but 'twas droll enough altogether. I
    fancied that I was the lieutenant over there: and yet the thing was not very
    much to my taste after all. I missed my good old mother and the dear little
    ones; who almost tear me to pieces for sheer love."

    He seated himself once more and nodded: the dream continued to haunt him, for
    he still had the shoes on his feet. A falling star shone in the dark
    firmament.

    "There falls another star," said he: "but what does it matter; there are
    always enough left. I should not much mind examining the little glimmering
    things somewhat nearer, especially the moon; for that would not slip so easily
    through a man's fingers. When we die--so at least says the student, for whom
    my wife does the washing--we shall fly about as light as a feather from one
    such a star to the other. That's, of course, not true: but 'twould be pretty
    enough if it were so. If I could but once take a leap up there, my body might
    stay here on the steps for what I care."

    Behold--there are certain things in the world to which one ought never to give
    utterance except with the greatest caution; but doubly careful must one be
    when we have the Shoes of Fortune on our feet. Now just listen to what
    happened to the watchman.

    As to ourselves, we all know the speed produced by the employment of steam; we
    have experienced it either on railroads, or in boats when crossing the sea;
    but such a flight is like the travelling of a sloth in comparison with the
    velocity with which light moves. It flies nineteen million times faster than
    the best race-horse; and yet electricity is quicker still. Death is an
    electric shock which our heart receives; the freed soul soars upwards on the
    wings of electricity. The sun's light wants eight minutes and some seconds to
    perform a journey of more than twenty million of our Danish* miles; borne by
    electricity, the soul wants even some minutes less to accomplish the same
    flight. To it the space between the heavenly bodies is not greater than the
    distance between the homes of our friends in town is for us, even if they live
    a short way from each other; such an electric shock in the heart, however,
    costs us the use of the body here below; unless, like the watchman of East
    Street, we happen to have on the Shoes of Fortune.

    * A Danish mile is nearly 4 3/4 English.


    In a few seconds the watchman had done the fifty-two thousand of our miles up
    to the moon, which, as everyone knows, was formed out of matter much lighter
    than our earth; and is, so we should say, as soft as newly-fallen snow. He
    found himself on one of the many circumjacent mountain-ridges with which we
    are acquainted by means of Dr. Madler's "Map of the Moon." Within, down it
    sunk perpendicularly into a caldron, about a Danish mile in depth; while below
    lay a town, whose appearance we can, in some measure, realize to ourselves by
    beating the white of an egg in a glass of water. The matter of which it was
    built was just as soft, and formed similar towers, and domes, and pillars,
    transparent and rocking in the thin air; while above his head our earth was
    rolling like a large fiery ball.

    He perceived immediately a quantity of beings who were certainly what we call
    "men"; yet they looked different to us. A far more correct imagination than
    that of the pseudo-Herschel* had created them; and if they had been placed in
    rank and file, and copied by some skilful painter's hand, one would, without
    doubt, have exclaimed involuntarily, "What a beautiful arabesque!"

    *This relates to a book published some years ago in Germany, and said to be by
    Herschel, which contained a description of the moon and its inhabitants,
    written with such a semblance of truth that many were deceived by the
    imposture.

    Probably a translation of the celebrated Moon hoax, written by Richard A.
    Locke, and originally published in New York.


    They had a language too; but surely nobody can expect that the soul of the
    watchman should understand it. Be that as it may, it did comprehend it; for in
    our souls there germinate far greater powers than we poor mortals, despite all
    our cleverness, have any notion of. Does she not show us--she the queen in the
    land of enchantment--her astounding dramatic talent in all our dreams? There
    every acquaintance appears and speaks upon the stage, so entirely in
    character, and with the same tone of voice, that none of us, when awake, were
    able to imitate it. How well can she recall persons to our mind, of whom we
    have not thought for years; when suddenly they step forth "every inch a man,"
    resembling the real personages, even to the finest features, and become the
    heroes or heroines of our world of dreams. In reality, such remembrances are
    rather unpleasant: every sin, every evil thought, may, like a clock with alarm
    or chimes, be repeated at pleasure; then the question is if we can trust
    ourselves to give an account of every unbecoming word in our heart and on our
    lips.

    The watchman's spirit understood the language of the inhabitants of the moon
    pretty well. The Selenites* disputed variously about our earth, and expressed
    their doubts if it could be inhabited: the air, they said, must certainly be
    too dense to allow any rational dweller in the moon the necessary free
    respiration. They considered the moon alone to be inhabited: they imagined it
    was the real heart of the universe or planetary system, on which the genuine
    Cosmopolites, or citizens of the world, dwelt. What strange things men--no,
    what strange things Selenites sometimes take into their heads!

    * Dwellers in the moon.


    About politics they had a good deal to say. But little Denmark must take care
    what it is about, and not run counter to the moon; that great realm, that
    might in an ill-humor bestir itself, and dash down a hail-storm in our faces,
    or force the Baltic to overflow the sides of its gigantic basin.

    We will, therefore, not listen to what was spoken, and on no condition run in
    the possibility of telling tales out of school; but we will rather proceed,
    like good quiet citizens, to East Street, and observe what happened meanwhile
    to the body of the watchman.

    He sat lifeless on the steps: the morning-star,* that is to say, the heavy
    wooden staff, headed with iron spikes, and which had nothing else in common
    with its sparkling brother in the sky, had glided from his hand; while his
    eyes were fixed with glassy stare on the moon, looking for the good old fellow
    of a spirit which still haunted it.

    *The watchmen in Germany, had formerly, and in some places they still carry
    with them, on their rounds at night, a sort of mace or club, known in ancient
    times by the above denomination.


    "What's the hour, watchman?" asked a passer-by. But when the watchman gave no
    reply, the merry roysterer, who was now returning home from a noisy drinking
    bout, took it into his head to try what a tweak of the nose would do, on which
    the supposed sleeper lost his balance, the body lay motionless, stretched out
    on the pavement: the man was dead. When the patrol came up, all his comrades,
    who comprehended nothing of the whole affair, were seized with a dreadful
    fright, for dead he was, and he remained so. The proper authorities were
    informed of the circumstance, people talked a good deal about it, and in the
    morning the body was carried to the hospital.

    Now that would be a very pretty joke, if the spirit when it came back and
    looked for the body in East Street, were not to find one. No doubt it would,
    in its anxiety, run off to the police, and then to the "Hue and Cry" office,
    to announce that "the finder will be handsomely rewarded," and at last away to
    the hospital; yet we may boldly assert that the soul is shrewdest when it
    shakes off every fetter, and every sort of leading-string--the body only makes
    it stupid.

    The seemingly dead body of the watchman wandered, as we have said, to the
    hospital, where it was brought into the general viewing-room: and the first
    thing that was done here was naturally to pull off the galoshes--when the
    spirit, that was merely gone out on adventures, must have returned with the
    quickness of lightning to its earthly tenement. It took its direction towards
    the body in a straight line; and a few seconds after, life began to show
    itself in the man. He asserted that the preceding night had been the worst
    that ever the malice of fate had allotted him; he would not for two silver
    marks again go through what he had endured while moon-stricken; but now,
    however, it was over.

    The same day he was discharged from the hospital as perfectly cured; but the
    Shoes meanwhile remained behind.


    IV. A Moment of Head Importance--An Evening's "Dramatic Readings"--A Most
    Strange Journey

    Every inhabitant of Copenhagen knows, from personal inspection, how the
    entrance to Frederick's Hospital looks; but as it is possible that others, who
    are not Copenhagen people, may also read this little work, we will beforehand
    give a short description of it.

    The extensive building is separated from the street by a pretty high railing,
    the thick iron bars of which are so far apart, that in all seriousness, it is
    said, some very thin fellow had of a night occasionally squeezed himself
    through to go and pay his little visits in the town. The part of the body most
    difficult to manage on such occasions was, no doubt, the head; here, as is so
    often the case in the world, long-headed people get through best. So much,
    then, for the introduction.

    One of the young men, whose head, in a physical sense only, might be said to
    be of the thickest, had the watch that evening. The rain poured down in
    torrents; yet despite these two obstacles, the young man was obliged to go
    out, if it were but for a quarter of an hour; and as to telling the
    door-keeper about it, that, he thought, was quite unnecessary, if, with a
    whole skin, he were able to slip through the railings. There, on the floor lay
    the galoshes, which the watchman had forgotten; he never dreamed for a moment
    that they were those of Fortune; and they promised to do him good service in
    the wet; so he put them on. The question now was, if he could squeeze himself
    through the grating, for he had never tried before. Well, there he stood.

    "Would to Heaven I had got my head through!" said he, involuntarily; and
    instantly through it slipped, easily and without pain, notwithstanding it was
    pretty large and thick. But now the rest of the body was to be got through!

    "Ah! I am much too stout," groaned he aloud, while fixed as in a vice. "I had
    thought the head was the most difficult part of the matter--oh! oh! I really
    cannot squeeze myself through!"

    He now wanted to pull his over-hasty head back again, but he could not. For
    his neck there was room enough, but for nothing more. His first feeling was of
    anger; his next that his temper fell to zero. The Shoes of Fortune had placed
    him in the most dreadful situation; and, unfortunately, it never occurred to
    him to wish himself free. The pitch-black clouds poured down their contents in
    still heavier torrents; not a creature was to be seen in the streets. To reach
    up to the bell was what he did not like; to cry aloud for help would have
    availed him little; besides, how ashamed would he have been to be found caught
    in a trap, like an outwitted fox! How was he to twist himself through! He saw
    clearly that it was his irrevocable destiny to remain a prisoner till dawn,
    or, perhaps, even late in the morning; then the smith must be fetched to file
    away the bars; but all that would not be done so quickly as he could think
    about it. The whole Charity School, just opposite, would be in motion; all the
    new booths, with their not very courtier-like swarm of seamen, would join them
    out of curiosity, and would greet him with a wild "hurrah!" while he was
    standing in his pillory: there would be a mob, a hissing, and rejoicing, and
    jeering, ten times worse than in the rows about the Jews some years ago--"Oh,
    my blood is mounting to my brain; 'tis enough to drive one mad! I shall go
    wild! I know not what to do. Oh! were I but loose; my dizziness would then
    cease; oh, were my head but loose!"

    You see he ought to have said that sooner; for the moment he expressed the
    wish his head was free; and cured of all his paroxysms of love, he hastened
    off to his room, where the pains consequent on the fright the Shoes had
    prepared for him, did not so soon take their leave.

    But you must not think that the affair is over now; it grows much worse.

    The night passed, the next day also; but nobody came to fetch the Shoes.

    In the evening "Dramatic Readings" were to be given at the little theatre in
    King Street. The house was filled to suffocation; and among other pieces to be
    recited was a new poem by H. C. Andersen, called, My Aunt's Spectacles; the
    contents of which were pretty nearly as follows:

    "A certain person had an aunt, who boasted of particular skill in
    fortune-telling with cards, and who was constantly being stormed by persons
    that wanted to have a peep into futurity. But she was full of mystery about
    her art, in which a certain pair of magic spectacles did her essential
    service. Her nephew, a merry boy, who was his aunt's darling, begged so long
    for these spectacles, that, at last, she lent him the treasure, after having
    informed him, with many exhortations, that in order to execute the interesting
    trick, he need only repair to some place where a great many persons were
    assembled; and then, from a higher position, whence he could overlook the
    crowd, pass the company in review before him through his spectacles.
    Immediately 'the inner man' of each individual would be displayed before him,
    like a game of cards, in which he unerringly might read what the future of
    every person presented was to be. Well pleased the little magician hastened
    away to prove the powers of the spectacles in the theatre; no place seeming to
    him more fitted for such a trial. He begged permission of the worthy audience,
    and set his spectacles on his nose. A motley phantasmagoria presents itself
    before him, which he describes in a few satirical touches, yet without
    expressing his opinion openly: he tells the people enough to set them all
    thinking and guessing; but in order to hurt nobody, he wraps his witty
    oracular judgments in a transparent veil, or rather in a lurid thundercloud,
    shooting forth bright sparks of wit, that they may fall in the powder-magazine
    of the expectant audience."

    The humorous poem was admirably recited, and the speaker much applauded. Among
    the audience was the young man of the hospital, who seemed to have forgotten
    his adventure of the preceding night. He had on the Shoes; for as yet no
    lawful owner had appeared to claim them; and besides it was so very dirty
    out-of-doors, they were just the thing for him, he thought.

    The beginning of the poem he praised with great generosity: he even found the
    idea original and effective. But that the end of it, like the Rhine, was very
    insignificant, proved, in his opinion, the author's want of invention; he was
    without genius, etc. This was an excellent opportunity to have said something
    clever.

    Meanwhile he was haunted by the idea--he should like to possess such a pair of
    spectacles himself; then, perhaps, by using them circumspectly, one would be
    able to look into people's hearts, which, he thought, would be far more
    interesting than merely to see what was to happen next year; for that we
    should all know in proper time, but the other never.

    "I can now," said he to himself, "fancy the whole row of ladies and gentlemen
    sitting there in the front row; if one could but see into their hearts--yes,
    that would be a revelation--a sort of bazar. In that lady yonder, so strangely
    dressed, I should find for certain a large milliner's shop; in that one the
    shop is empty, but it wants cleaning plain enough. But there would also be
    some good stately shops among them. Alas!" sighed he, "I know one in which all
    is stately; but there sits already a spruce young shopman, which is the only
    thing that's amiss in the whole shop. All would be splendidly decked out, and
    we should hear, 'Walk in, gentlemen, pray walk in; here you will find all you
    please to want.' Ah! I wish to Heaven I could walk in and take a trip right
    through the hearts of those present!"

    And behold! to the Shoes of Fortune this was the cue; the whole man shrunk
    together and a most uncommon journey through the hearts of the front row of
    spectators, now began. The first heart through which he came, was that of a
    middle-aged lady, but he instantly fancied himself in the room of the
    "Institution for the cure of the crooked and deformed," where casts of
    mis-shapen limbs are displayed in naked reality on the wall. Yet there was
    this difference, in the institution the casts were taken at the entry of the
    patient; but here they were retained and guarded in the heart while the sound
    persons went away. They were, namely, casts of female friends, whose bodily or
    mental deformities were here most faithfully preserved.

    With the snake-like writhings of an idea he glided into another female heart;
    but this seemed to him like a large holy fane.* The white dove of innocence
    fluttered over the altar. How gladly would he have sunk upon his knees; but he
    must away to the next heart; yet he still heard the pealing tones of the
    organ, and he himself seemed to have become a newer and a better man; he felt
    unworthy to tread the neighboring sanctuary which a poor garret, with a sick
    bed-rid mother, revealed. But God's warm sun streamed through the open window;
    lovely roses nodded from the wooden flower-boxes on the roof, and two sky-blue
    birds sang rejoicingly, while the sick mother implored God's richest blessings
    on her pious daughter.

    * temple

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