[00:01.19]Great. So,um,I'll give you a call.
[00:01.19]好吧 回去我打给你
[00:03.80]- I hope you do. - All right.
[00:03.80]- 要记得哦 - 没问题
[00:08.23]Look at this.
[00:08.23]瞧瞧呀
[00:09.39]I just got that girl's number. Check it out.
[00:09.39]我刚刚拿到那美女号码了 你们看
[00:12.08]Holly. Nice.
[00:12.08]叫Holly 干得好
[00:14.54]Girls whose names end in L-Y are always dirty.
[00:14.54]女生名字要是以ly结尾 通常都很浪
[00:18.34]Holly,Kelly,Carly,Lily.
[00:18.34]比如说Holly Kelly Carly Lily
[00:23.65]Oh,yeah,I know it's true.
[00:23.65]倒也没说错
[00:25.98]And don't even get me started on girlshose names should end in Y,
[00:25.98]更别说那些本以为是名字以Y结尾
[00:30.35]but instead end in I.
[00:30.35]其实是以I结尾的女生
[00:32.22]Those girls are like roller coasters.
[00:32.22]搭上她们就像坐过山车那样
[00:34.67]You got to wait in a long line,but once you get up there,
[00:34.67]你得排一长条队 可等你上车后
[00:36.94]you just hold on for dear life and hope you don't drop your keys.
[00:36.94]你只会感叹想要抓住美好的人生 希望别掉链子
[00:40.44]Hey,you know what I'm gonna do?
[00:40.44]知道我要怎么做吗?
[00:41.63]I'm gonna call her right now.
[00:41.63]我现在就打给她
[00:43.48]I'm gonna do that whole,"Hey,remember me? It's been so long."
[00:43.48]我要跟她讲 "嘿 还记得我吧? 有一阵子没见了"
[00:48.24]See,it's funny because I just saw her.
[00:48.24]很有趣吧 因为我刚刚才见过她
[00:50.10]Dude,you can't call her.
[00:50.10]兄弟 不能打给她
[00:51.44]You have to wait three days to call a woman. That's the rule.
[00:51.44]你得三天后才能打给她 这是规矩
[00:54.15]Barney,that rule is completely played out.
[00:54.15]Barney 这规矩已经过时了
[00:56.11]Girls know exactly what you're doing.
[00:56.11]女生们都知道你在想什么
[00:57.53]Hey,I got a new rule.
[00:57.53]嘿 我来创造个新规矩
[00:59.75]It's kind of crazy,but I call it,You like her,you call her.
[00:59.75]虽然有点不着调 我把它叫做 "喜欢她 就打给她"
[01:04.35]I'm sorry. Can you repeat that? I don't speak I Never Get Laid.
[01:04.35]不好意思 能再说一次吗? 我不太懂"钓不到妞"语
[01:08.78]Barney,the Three Days Rule is insane.
[01:08.78]Barney 三天之约太愚蠢了
[01:11.36]I mean,who even came up with that?
[01:11.36]你说 谁提出来的?
[01:14.64]Jesus.
[01:14.64]耶稣
[01:16.13]Barney,don't do this. Not with Jesus.
[01:16.13]Barney 别这样 别把耶稣扯进来
[01:18.93]Seriously. Jesus started the whole wait-three-days thing.
[01:18.93]我认真的 三天之约确实是耶稣创造的
[01:22.98]He waited three days to come back to life.
[01:22.98]他被钉死第三天才复活的
[01:25.29]It was perfect.
[01:25.29]这才完美嘛
[01:26.32]If he have only waited one day,a lot of people wouldn't have even heard that he died.
[01:26.32]要是他等一天就复活 很多人甚至都不知道他的死讯
[01:29.89]They'd be all,"Hey,Jesus,what up?"
[01:29.89]不知情的就跟他打招呼 "嘿 耶稣 吃了饭没?"
[01:32.38]And Jesus would probably be,like,"What up? I died yesterday."
[01:32.38]耶稣可能就会这么说 "吃啥饭呀? 我昨儿个死了"
[01:36.66]And then they'd be all,Uh,you look pretty alive to me,dude.
[01:36.66]而其他人就说 "呃 我看你还挺鲜活的呀 兄弟"
[01:40.28]And then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected and how it was a miracle.
[01:40.28]然后耶稣就得跟他们解释 他是怎么奇迹般地复活的
[01:44.06]And then,the dude would be,like,Uh,okay,whatever you say,bro.
[01:44.06]那些家伙就会说"好了 兄弟你就吹吧"
[01:48.56]Wow,ancient dialogue sounds so stilted now.
[01:48.56]古人说话咋这么做作
[01:51.65]And he's not going to come back on a Saturday.
[01:51.65]然而他要星期六复活也不成 (耶稣星期日复活)
[01:53.65]Everybody's busy doing chores.
[01:53.65]大家都忙着家务事呢
[01:56.14]Working the loom,trimming their beards. No.
[01:56.14]他们都在家织布 修胡须 复活可不成 (犹太人星期六不工作)
[01:58.98]He waits the exact right number of days... Three.
[01:58.98]他等到最适合的时间... 第三天
[02:03.63]Okay,I promise-- I'll wait three days. Just please stop talking.
[02:03.63]好了 我保证第三天才打电话 拜托咱们转话题吧
[02:07.87]Plus,it's Sunday,so everyone's in church already.
[02:07.87]还有 那时是星期日 大家都在教堂呢
[02:10.98]They're all in there,Oh,no,Jesus is dead.
[02:10.98]在教堂见到耶稣 说"不 耶稣竟然死了"
[02:14.44]Then,bam! He bursts through the back door,runs up the aisle.
[02:14.44]然后 砰! 他推开后门 穿过走廊
[02:18.43]Everyone's totally psyched.
[02:18.43]大家都激动死了
[02:19.74]And,FYI,that's when he invented the high-five.
[02:19.74]还有 你要知道 击掌就是在那时发明的
[02:23.07]Three days,Ted.
[02:23.07]三天 Ted
[02:24.53]We wait three days to call a woman because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait.
[02:24.53]三天后再打给那女生 因为耶稣要我们等三天
[02:32.32]True story.
[02:32.32]我可是说真的
[02:45.65]How I Met Your Mother Season04 Episode21
[02:45.65]老爸老妈浪漫史 第四季 第21集
[02:47.65]Okay,fine. I promise,I won't call Holly for three days.
[02:47.65]好吧 我保证三天后再打给Holly
[02:52.04]But I never said anything about texting.
[02:52.04]可我没说不能发短信
[02:54.77]I started things off with something cute and charming.
[02:54.77]我发了一条可爱又迷人的短信
[02:57.70]"I was thinking about you,so I thought I'd send you a little texty text."
[02:57.70]"我正想你呢 所以给你发条小短信"
[03:01.99]And the moment I hit "Send," I realized it wasn't cute at all.
[03:01.99]在我手指按上"发送"之时 我意识到这一点都不可爱
[03:06.55]texty text
[03:06.55]小短信
[03:06.55]It was the lamest thing anyone has ever said to anyone.
[03:06.55]对别人说这话 真是丢脸死了
[03:10.01]And the worst thing about texting is that once you send it...
[03:10.01]而发短信最大的缺点 就是一旦你发了出去...
[03:15.80]Oh,no! No!
[03:15.80]别! 别跑!
[03:19.59]you can never get it back.
[03:19.59]就覆水难收了
[03:21.78]And then... you wait.
[03:21.78]然后...你就等着回信
[03:22.59]******
[03:22.59]23分钟后
[03:24.36]And just when you've decided never to text anyone again...
[03:24.36]就在你决定再也不给别人发短信的同时
[03:29.46]"I've been thinking about you,too,
[03:29.46]"我也在想着你呢"
[03:31.79]"and how weird is it that you texted me while I was in the bath?"
[03:31.79]"收到短信时我就躺在浴缸 很奇怪吧?"
[03:42.33]- What was that? - What?
[03:42.33]- 你怎么了? - 啥?
[03:43.81]- You made a noise. - That was my phone. I got a text.
[03:43.81]- 你发出了奇怪的声音 - 是我的手机 我收到短信了
[03:46.87]- Not that. You made your naked lady noise. - What?
[03:46.87]- 不是说那个 你发出了裸女之声 - 啥?
[03:49.98]Whenever you see a naked lady,you make the noise.
[03:49.98]每次你见到裸女 就会发出这种声音
[03:56.10]I don't do that.
[03:56.10]才不是呢
[03:57.44]Really?
[03:57.44]真的吗?
[04:00.91]Oh,God,sorry,Lily.
[04:00.91]不好意思 Lily
[04:07.62]While the men are out hunting,the women of New Guinea's indigenous Korowai tribe
[04:07.62]家里的男人都出去打猎了 新几内亚Korowai部落的女人
[04:11.51]wash their clothes in the river.
[04:11.51]就会在河边洗衣服
[04:21.10]That's totally a boob.
[04:21.10]这肯定是胸部
[04:24.94]Is that Holly who keeps texting you?
[04:24.94]是那个Holly给你发短信吗?
[04:26.87]Didn't you promise to wait three days?
[04:26.87]你不是保证过要等三天吗?
[04:28.59]To call,yes. Texting is totally different.
[04:28.59]不打电话嘛 发短信可不同
[04:31.53]Okay,well,just try to keep the naked lady noises to a minimum.
[04:31.53]随你了 只要把裸女之声调到最低就好
[04:34.79]I don't make a naked lady noise.
[04:34.79]我没有发出裸女之声
[04:38.67]Really?
[04:38.67]真的?
[04:46.25]Holly and I stayed up texting until 2:00 in the morning.
[04:46.25]我和Holly互发短信直到凌晨2点
[04:50.46]And we spent the whole next day texting each other,too.
[04:50.46]第二天我们也发了一整天短信
[04:54.07]She seemed perfect.
[04:54.07]她真的很棒
[04:57.03]Holly just told me what she's wearing right now.
[04:57.03]Holly刚跟我说她现在穿着什么
[05:00.07]It is pretty hot.
[05:00.07]可真辣呀
[05:01.63]Yeah,whatever it is,I can guarantee you she's not wearing it.
[05:01.63]不管是什么 我向你保证 她没说真话
[05:04.70]She's lying to you to make you like her.
[05:04.70]她在说谎 好让你喜欢她
[05:06.26]- How do you know that? - Here. Come here.
[05:06.26]- 你怎么知道? - 拿来
[05:09.03]Because no woman in the history of the world is ever
[05:09.03]因为史上从来没有女孩会
[05:11.63]"just sitting around reading architecture magazines in my old cheerleader uniform."
[05:11.63]"穿着以前的啦啦队制服 静静坐着看建筑杂志"
[05:17.56]Okay,maybe she's lying about the architecture magazines.
[05:17.56]好吧 或许看建筑杂志那是假的
[05:25.83]Oh,no.
[05:25.83]噢 不
[05:27.38]- Oh,no. This is bad. - What?
[05:27.38]- 噢 不 坏菜了 - 怎么了?
[05:29.67]She just sent me a text that was clearly meant for someone else.
[05:29.67]她刚刚发了条短信 明显收信人就不该是我
[05:34.76]"Hey,baby,I picked up some take-out from Generro's. Be home soon."
[05:34.76]"亲爱的 我去Generro那儿带点外卖 很快回来"
[05:39.17]Okay,yes,this sounds bad,but let's think about this,okay?
[05:39.17]听起来不太妙 不过往好的方面想
[05:42.57]It could be for a brother or maybe her sick dad.
[05:42.57]可能是她兄弟 或者是有个病了的爸爸
[05:46.44]Scroll down.
[05:46.44]继续看
[05:49.23]"And then I want you to do me on the couch."
[05:49.23]"然后我要你在沙发上干我"
[05:53.79]Okay,maybe not a sick dad.
[05:53.79]好吧 不一定是个病老爸
[05:56.39]Or a very sick dad. Am I right?
[05:56.39]可能是个变态老爸 对吧?
[06:01.74]Sorry.
[06:01.74]对不起
[06:04.34]Hey,guys.
[06:04.34]大伙儿
[06:07.25]God. What is this?
[06:07.25]这是啥?
[06:09.95]It's just some take-out from Generro's. I'm bringing it home for Lily.
[06:09.95]Generro's那儿的外卖 给Lily带的
[06:12.64]Oh,that's weird.
[06:12.64]奇怪了
[06:14.10]Holly just texted Ted something about take-out from Generro's.
[06:14.10]Holly刚给Ted发了条短信 要去Generro's那儿带外卖
[06:19.66]Wait a second.
[06:19.66]等等
[06:21.79]- You sons of bitches. - What?
[06:21.79]- 你们俩混蛋 - 怎么了?
[06:25.35]You're Holly.
[06:25.35]你们就是Holly
[06:30.78]So Ted hasn't been texting Holly at all?
[06:30.78]这么说给Ted发短信的人不是Holly?
[06:33.80]He's been texting you two?
[06:33.80]他一直在跟你们发短信?
[06:35.43]Look,we knew he'd try to call her before the three days,so I swiped his phone,
[06:35.43]我们就知道他忍不了三天 所以我偷了他电话
[06:39.75]and I changed her number to my work cell.
[06:39.75]把那女生的号码换为我的工作手机号码
[06:42.42]We were just gonna bust on him for calling her too soon,but then he started texting her.
[06:42.42]我们只是想抓到他不遵守规矩 没想到他给她竟然发短信
[06:49.34]Texty text?
[06:49.34]小短信?
[06:51.43]Oh,Ted.
[06:51.43]噢 Ted
[06:52.75]Oh,poor,sweet Ted. We should... we should tell him it's us.
[06:52.75]可怜的Ted呀 咱们--咱们得告诉他这是我们
[06:57.04]Yeah. Or...
[06:57.04]好 又或者...
[06:59.43]we pretend we're Holly,and we're in the bath.
[06:59.43]我们装作是Holly 现在躺在浴缸
[07:03.77]Yeah,that's better.
[07:03.77]这主意更好
[07:11.21]Well,that was fun.
[07:11.21]真好玩
[07:12.83]We should tell him that it's us.
[07:12.83]我们还是告诉他真相吧
[07:14.13]Yeah,we should. Or...
[07:14.13]应该的 又或者...
[07:17.05]we tell him our favorite color is red,and we think the cowboy look is very sexy.
[07:17.05]我们跟他说红色是咱们的最爱 还有牛仔装扮非常性感
[07:22.89]Yeah,that's better.
[07:22.89]不错
[07:25.63]I'm wearing them right now,and they do look sexy.
[07:25.63]穿着呢 没错 真的很性感
[07:31.11]- He put on the boots! - He totally put on the boots!
[07:31.11]- 他穿上了那双靴子! - 他真的穿上了那双靴子!
[07:35.33]- That was awesome! - Yeah.
[07:35.33]- 帅呀! - 对呀
[07:36.98]But it's time to tell him who he really put those boots on for.
[07:36.98]不过是时候告诉他是谁在玩他了
[07:40.71]Yeah. Or...
[07:40.71]没错 又或者...
[07:43.08]we just took off our shirt.
[07:43.08]说美女正宽衣解带
[07:46.01]Yeah,that's better.
[07:46.01]不错
[07:48.62]You think maybe we're wearing a black lace bra underneath?
[07:48.62]你说咱们穿着黑色蕾丝胸罩打底好不?
[07:54.03]I don't think we're wearing anything underneath.
[07:54.03]我觉得咱们不应该打底
[07:56.32]God,we're hot.
[07:56.32]老天 咱们真辣
[08:00.50]Now he's only wearing the cowboy boots! It is on!
[08:00.50]现在他只穿着那双牛仔靴子了! 好戏上场了!
[08:04.01]It is so on! Okay,okay,tell him that we're...
[08:04.01]来吧来吧! 好 咱们这么说...
[08:06.10]we're slowing slipping out of our...
[08:06.10]咱们慢慢地褪下...
[08:10.94]What are we doing?
[08:10.94]咱们在干嘛呢?
[08:14.82]I think that we're about to have sex with Ted.
[08:14.82]我估计咱们要跟Ted电话做爱了
[08:22.90]So,you did this to him all day? That's just mean.
[08:22.90]你们就这么一整天地耍他? 太过分了
[08:26.45]No,no. No,it was... It was actually for his own good.
[08:26.45]不...这样是为了他好
[08:30.07]We're protecting him from himself.
[08:30.07]我们在保护他不被自己所伤害
[08:31.62]He... No. He really likes this girl.
[08:31.62]他...他真的喜欢这女孩
[08:33.28]He had that-that look in his eye.
[08:33.28]从他的眼神能看出来
[08:34.98]Yeah,that crazy "I'm about to move too fast and screw this up" look.
[08:34.98]对 那种"我会进展过快而搞砸"的眼神
[08:39.17]It was actually the same look he had on his first date with you.
[08:39.17]这跟与你第一次约会的眼神是一样的
[08:41.70]- And we all remember how that went. - Yeah.
[08:41.70]- 大家都记得最后怎样了吧 - 没错
[08:44.40]- I think I'm in love with you. - What?
[08:44.40]- 我爱上你了 - 啥?
[08:47.42]Yeah,well,I-I think I was a special case.
[08:47.42]嗯 我-我觉得自己是个特别的例子
[08:50.38]This Holly is no Robin Scherbatsky.
[08:50.38]这个Holly可不是Robin Scherbatsky
[08:53.98]Hey,what is the deal with her hair?
[08:53.98]嘿 她头发是怎么回事?
[08:55.37]I mean,news flash: they make conditioners that don't leave a buildup.
[08:55.37]最新消息:就跟现在的空调一样偷工减料
[09:00.22]I'm so b.
[09:00.22]我太坏了
[09:01.86]Look,it's been a while since Ted really liked someone.
[09:01.86]听着 Ted很久没这么喜欢过一个人了
[09:04.69]He's clearly got a lot of crazy stored up. We just...
[09:04.69]他隐忍了很久 我们只是...
[09:07.23]we thought we'd get him to say "I love you" before he even makes contact with this girl.
[09:07.23]我们想让他说"我爱你"之前 起码能了解下这个女孩
[09:11.11]And you can tell it's on the way. He's exhibiting all the telltale signs.
[09:11.11]你跟她继续说 我拿证据出来
[09:14.29]Yeah. One: He joked about getting married.
[09:14.29]第一:他拿结婚开玩笑
[09:17.33]"You like architecture? We should get married." "Ha-ha.LOL."
[09:17.33]"你喜欢建筑师? 咱们结婚吧" "哈哈 LOL." (laugh out loud简写 大声地笑)
[09:22.20]"Just kidding. Question mark?"
[09:22.20]"开玩笑的啦 问号"
[09:25.04]Two: He made a crazy way-too-soon trip suggestion.
[09:25.04]第二:他太单刀直入了
[09:29.05]"I like beer,too. We should totally go to Germany together."
[09:29.05]"我也喜欢啤酒 咱们一起去德国吧"
[09:32.64]"LOL.JK.LOL."
[09:32.64]"LOL.JK.LOL." (just kidding简写 开玩笑)
[09:37.01]And three: He got way too personal way too soon.
[09:37.01]第三:他太快进入私人话题
[09:40.90]"Yeah,my parents got divorced a couple years back.
[09:40.90]"我父母几年前离婚了
[09:44.02]It was really tough." LOL."
[09:44.02]那时我很难过" "LOL."
[09:48.24]And he clearly doesn't know what LOL means.
[09:48.24]他肯定不知道LOL啥意思吧
[09:50.58]Yeah,but here's the real problem.
[09:50.58]还有个更严重的问题
[09:51.93]Ted wasn't saying "I love you" as easily as we thought he would.
[09:51.93]Ted没我们想象中容易说"我爱你"
[09:55.67]Then we met... Stan.
[09:55.67]直到我们遇到...Stan
[10:04.80]Why are you making so much noise,man?
[10:04.80]吵吵啥呀? 伙计
[10:08.29]So we explained everything to him,and when we were done,something amazing happened.
[10:08.29]我们就跟他解释咯 解释完后 有趣的事情发生了
[10:14.01]Why don't you tell Ted that just knowing he's out there,thinking about you,
[10:14.01]不如你们跟Ted说 他能想着你们
[10:17.58]caring about you,makes you feel safe?
[10:17.58]关心你们 让你们有安全感很开心?
[10:20.74]So,all your fears,all your yesterdays wash away,
[10:20.74]你们的恐惧 往事统统赶走
[10:23.90]and only hope remains in the promise of his embrace.
[10:23.90]希望就留在他承诺的怀抱中
[10:30.47]Go,Stan. Who is this guy?
[10:30.47]Stan好家伙 他谁呀?
[10:32.93]He's a security guard who works nights.
[10:32.93]他是个夜班的保安
[10:34.35]And he eats lunch at MacLaren's every day.
[10:34.35]他每天都在Maclaren's吃午饭
[10:36.14]- And he wasn't done. - Not by a long shot.
[10:36.14]- 他还没说完 - 喝了点小酒后
[10:39.05]You make me thank God for every mistake I ever made
[10:39.05]你让我为自己犯下的每个错误 都心怀感激
[10:41.81]because each one led me down the path that brought me to you.
[10:41.81]因为它们把我带到你身边
[10:46.46]That's,uh,really nice,man.
[10:46.46]你真好 兄弟
[10:49.10]Whatever. It's okay.
[10:49.10]管他呢 挺好的
[10:52.37]"And when finally come together,"I want you to hold me.
[10:52.37]"当相遇那一天终于来临 我想要你抱着我"
[10:56.08]Hold me" "all night. Stroke my hair."
[10:56.08]"整晚的抱着我 抚摸着我的秀发"
[10:59.49]"Tell me I'm a woman and show me you're a man.
[10:59.49]"让我知道自己是个弱女子 而你是个真男人"
[11:02.62]Until there there was only now."
[11:02.62]"矢志不渝"
[11:04.76]You and I... and now."
[11:04.76]"你和我...尽在此刻"
[11:09.17]Yes!
[11:09.17]我愿意!
[11:11.96]You want me to text that to Ted. I know that.
[11:11.96]你想让我把这些话发给Ted 我明白了
[11:17.52]"I do not ask "of the night explanations.
[11:17.52]"我不需要你今晚做出决定
[11:20.15]I wait for it,and it envelops me,"
[11:20.15]我愿意等 而这感觉拥抱着我"
[11:23.03]"and so you and bread and light and shadow are."
[11:23.03]"而我也被你被面包和阳光以及阴影围绕"
[11:29.65]That's Pablo Neruda.
[11:29.65]这是诗人Pablo Neruda写的
[11:31.87]I don't know,um,what bread was doing in there,
[11:31.87]我不知道干嘛会提到面包
[11:34.85]but that touched me here and here.
[11:34.85]但这些话真的打动我的这里和这里
[11:40.50]Well,if Ted won't say it,I will.
[11:40.50]好吧 如果Ted不愿说这番话 我替他会说的
[11:44.18]I love you.
[11:44.18]我爱你
[11:47.86]That's cool.
[11:47.86]很好
[11:51.39]Still nothing,huh?
[11:51.39]还是没回复 啊?
[11:52.78]Maybe he's not in love with us.
[11:52.78]可能他并不爱我们吧
[11:54.21]How can he not be in love with us? We're everything he's looking for.
[11:54.21]他怎能不爱我们? 我们就是他苦苦寻找的一切
[11:56.94]I don't get men.
[11:56.94]我真搞不懂男人
[12:00.11]Got to head to work.
[12:00.11]我要回去工作了
[12:01.38]Will you be... Will you be back?
[12:01.38]你还会...还会回来吗?
[12:04.00]I'll be back when the wind and fates and chance bring me back.
[12:04.00]当风吹起 命运召唤我之时 我会回来的
[12:08.20]Which will be tomorrow.
[12:08.20]可能是明天吧
[12:10.11]It's cheese steak day.
[12:10.11]明天奶酪牛排搞特价
[12:14.50]It sounds like you were all over this guy.
[12:14.50]听着你们很迷这个大汉啊
[12:17.58]Hope his girlfriend didn't get jealous.
[12:17.58]希望他的女朋友不会吃醋
[12:19.92]Did he mention a girlfriend or...
[12:19.92]他有提到女朋友或者...
[12:23.32]It was all going great until Marshall sent Ted a text meant for Lily and ruined everything.
[12:23.32]一切进展顺利直到Marshall 把给Lily的短信误发给了Ted 全毁了
[12:28.53]Well,it doesn't matter. Okay? It's over now.
[12:28.53]没关系 知道吧 一切都结束了
[12:31.05]I got to get going,but here's what's going to happen:
[12:31.05]我要走了 但是你们得这么做:
[12:33.18]You're going to call him right now,tell him what you did,and apologize.
[12:33.18]你们赶紧打电话给他 坦白你们的恶作剧 向他道歉
[12:37.68]- You got it? - Yes.
[12:37.68]- 你们听清楚了吗? - 明白了
[12:43.07]Or...
[12:43.07]或者...
[12:45.13]Holly explained everything. It was all just a misunderstanding.
[12:45.13]Holly解释说那完全是个误会
[12:48.06]- Everything's great now. - Really?
[12:48.06]- 现在没事了 - 真的?
[12:50.47]Uh,how did,uh,Holly explain her way out of that one?
[12:50.47]那么Holly是怎么解释那件事的?
[12:53.43]Well,apparently,her dumb friend Marsha accidentally used her phone to text her husband Billy.
[12:53.43]事实上是她的蠢朋友Marsha 不小心用了她的手机给老公Billy发短信
[12:58.77]Marsha and Billy.
[12:58.77]Marsha和Billy
[13:00.33]No one sprained any muscles there.
[13:00.33]可真是天衣无缝啊
[13:03.29]And now we are better than ever.
[13:03.29]我们俩感情反而更好了
[13:05.95]Look,I know this sounds crazy,but I think I might actually be falling for this girl.
[13:05.95]看 虽然听起来很不可思议 但我觉得自己是爱上这个女孩了
[13:11.37]- You're falling for Barney and Marshall. - What?
[13:11.37]- 你是爱上了Barney和Marshall - 什么?
[13:14.47]They didn't believe that you could wait the three days,
[13:14.47]他们不相信你会等上3天
[13:17.24]so Barney changed her number in your phone to his work cell.
[13:17.24]所以Barney把你手机里她的号码 换成了自己的商务号码
[13:20.71]Holly is Barney and Marshall.
[13:20.71]Holly就是Barney和Marshall
[13:22.78]Wait. That whole time it was them?
[13:22.78]慢着 这全是他们搞的?
[13:26.07]So Holly wasn't in the bath?
[13:26.07]那么Holly没有躺在浴缸里?
[13:31.20]Or sitting by her window,looking up at the stars,thinking about me?
[13:31.20]没有坐在窗户边上 看着满天繁星 在想我?
[13:38.69]Or lounging in her old cheerleader uniform reading architecture magazines?
[13:38.69]也没有套上旧拉拉队服在读建筑杂志?
[13:46.54]Yeah. I don't think they actually did those things.
[13:46.54]对 我想他们都没做这些事
[13:49.13]They were just at the bar.
[13:49.13]他们只是待在酒吧里
[13:51.26]Right.
[13:51.26]没错
[13:52.44]But,yeah,it was them.
[13:52.44]没错 但就是他们搞的鬼
[13:55.11]- Unbelievab. - I know.
[13:55.11]- 真不敢相信 - 我明白
[13:57.17]So you might as well tell them you're on to them.
[13:57.17]你也可以跟他们说 你识破了他们的恶作剧
[13:59.15]Yeah. Or...
[13:59.15]对 或者...
[14:03.09]I text them something that will really mess with their heads.
[14:03.09]我给他们发一些让他们摸不着头脑的东西
[14:05.79]Oh,I gotcha. Okay. How about...
[14:05.79]哦 我明白了 比如说...
[14:10.42]"I haven't told any of my friends yet,but I only have three months to live?"
[14:10.42]"我没跟自己的朋友提起过 其实我只剩3个月的命了?"
[14:15.17]- Not bad. - Yeah.
[14:15.17]- 不错 - 对
[14:16.43]How about "I once killed a man with a shovel,and those feelings are creeping up again"?
[14:16.43]比如说 "我曾经拿铁铲杀了一个人 那种感觉似乎又回来了"?
[14:22.48]I-I liked that thing someone said before about having three months to live.
[14:22.48]我喜欢刚才有人提到的 只剩3月寿命的建议
[14:26.27]How about "I never told anyone this,but I slept with my best friend's mom"?
[14:26.27]比如说"我从未跟别人说过 但我和好友的妈妈上过床"?
[14:30.99]Oh,that is good,but I feel like we keep coming back to that three months to live thing.
[14:30.99]不错 但我更想接着回到只剩3个月可活的话题
[14:35.92]- Wait. I think I got it. - Oh,yeah?
[14:35.92]- 等等 我知道了 - 哦 真的?
[14:41.18]He texted back!
[14:41.18]他回短信了!
[14:43.45]"I probably shouldn't tell you this.
[14:43.45]"我本不该跟你说的"
[14:46.32]I mean we barely know each other."
[14:46.32]"我是说我们根本不了解彼此"
[14:49.32]But what the hell,I'll just say it.
[14:49.32]"但是管他呢 我还是想说"
[14:51.66]This is it,dude. Here comes the "I love you."
[14:51.66]来了来了 伙计 要说"我爱你"了
[14:54.38]- I sh Stan were here. - Stan.
[14:54.38]- 真希望Stan也在这儿 - Stan
[15:00.41]What?
[15:00.41]什么?
[15:02.18]I sometimes have gay dreams about my best friend.
[15:02.18]我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦
[15:10.95]I sometimes have gay dreams about my best friend.
[15:10.95]我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦
[15:15.13]Why in the world would Ted text a girl he barely knows that he sometimes has gay dreams about me?
[15:15.13]Ted到底为何会对一个陌生的女孩说 他有时会对我存有同性恋幻想?
[15:21.91]Slow your roll. You?
[15:21.91]慢着下结论 他指的是你?
[15:24.55]He's clearly talking about me.
[15:24.55]很明显他是在说我
[15:26.42]Dude,it's me. I'm his best friend.
[15:26.42]伙计 是我 我是他最好的哥们
[15:28.86]Okay,one: that has never been proven.
[15:28.86]好吧 第一:这从未得到证实
[15:30.96]Two: If anyone were to have gay dreams about one of us,it would be me.
[15:30.96]第二:如果有人会对我们其中一个 产生同性恋幻想 那也必然是对我
[15:35.64]I mean,look at me. Now look at you.
[15:35.64]看看我 再看看你自己
[15:38.33]A still-in-the-closet 80-year-old wouldn't be into that mess.
[15:38.33]即使是80岁的老古董也不会是 你这副德行
[15:43.14]Here's the thing,Barney. I'm snuggly. You're not.
[15:43.14]关键在于 Barney 我让人感觉温暖 而你不是
[15:46.56]Who wouldn't want to snuggle up next to this business on a Sunday morning?
[15:46.56]谁周日早上不想偎依在这结实的怀抱里?
[15:50.33]Wrapped in a comforter,and it's raining outside,and there's muffins warming in the oven.
[15:50.33]缠绕在胸膛里 就算窗外下着雨 烤炉里正热着松饼
[15:54.69]I'm cuddly,bitch. Deal with it.
[15:54.69]我就是如此居家 贱人 就是这样
[15:57.48]I work out every day.
[15:57.48]我每天都健身
[15:59.74]If there is one thing we know about Ted,it's that he likes a nice body.
[15:59.74]我们最了解Ted的莫过于他喜欢好身材
[16:03.55]This body would rock his world.
[16:03.55]这副身材会让他疯狂
[16:05.24]Ted and I have a history. I know what he likes.
[16:05.24]我和Ted结交多年 我知道他的喜好
[16:07.99]There are things I could do to him that would blow his mind...
[16:07.99]我能为他做的那些事 会让他失去理智...
[16:14.44]Why do we keep trying to have sex with Ted?
[16:14.44]为啥我们要抢着去和Ted嘿咻?
[16:16.24]I don't know. It's weird.
[16:16.24]我也不知道 太奇怪了
[16:18.42]Crazy,right?
[16:18.42]简直疯了 对吧?
[16:20.06]Ted's having gay dreams about me.
[16:20.06]Ted对我有同性恋幻想
[16:22.54]And by me,he means M-E,Marshall Eriksen,
[16:22.54]他所说的"我" 指的是M-E Marshall Eriksen
[16:26.66]star of Ted's gay dreams.
[16:26.66]Ted同性恋春梦里的情人
[16:29.38]Who cares? So Ted has gay dreams about one of you guys.
[16:29.38]管他呢 就是说Ted同性恋春梦梦到你们其中一个
[16:32.55]It's not like you found out he has three months to live.
[16:32.55]而不是你们发现他只剩3个月的寿命
[16:36.21]That's like,oh,shocking,right?
[16:36.21]这真是 太震惊了 对吧?
[16:39.88]Hey,look at this guy.
[16:39.88]嘿 瞧瞧这小子
[16:41.68]How's it going,uh,best friend of 12 years?
[16:41.68]今天还好吧? 12年的好朋友
[16:45.31]Well,it's kind of weird,but,uh,I had this crazy dream the other night.
[16:45.31]感觉很奇怪 但是我昨晚做了个疯狂的梦
[16:50.98]It's a little embarrassing.
[16:50.98]真令人尴尬
[16:52.24]You can tell us,Ted. This is a safe space.
[16:52.24]你可以告诉我们 Ted 这里很安全
[16:54.93]ah,your feelings are perfectly natural,buddy.
[16:54.93]你的感觉是很正常的 伙计
[16:57.73]Okay. Here's what happened. So I'm at...
[16:57.73]好吧 事情是这样的 那么我当时在...
[17:01.70]And then I proceeded to waste a half hour of those bastards' lives,
[17:01.70]于是我浪费了这俩混蛋半小时的时间
[17:05.29]telling them about this dream I had
[17:05.29]告诉他们我的梦
[17:06.73]where I ate dinner with my top five favorite architects throughout history.
[17:06.73]梦里我跟最喜欢的5位建筑师一起吃饭
[17:10.56]And then,at the end of the meal,Frank Gehry slides the check over to I.M.Pei,
[17:10.56]最后吃完饭 Frank Gehry把账单推给I.M.Pei
[17:14.93]and he says,Buddy,tonight,your name is I.M.Paying.
[17:14.93]他说 伙计 今晚你就是"付账先生"了 (与其名字谐音)
[17:20.88]Buckminster Fuller almost did a spit take.
[17:20.88]Buckminster Fuller差点喷饭了
[17:25.64]And then I woke up.
[17:25.64]然后我就醒了
[17:28.79]So,that-that's it?
[17:28.79]那么 就这样?
[17:30.95]No other dreams?
[17:30.95]没做别的梦?
[17:32.87]- Nothing confusing or erotic? - Nope.
[17:32.87]- 迷乱或者色情的梦呢? - 没有
[17:38.40]Okay,how about this?
[17:38.40]好吧 这么说吧
[17:39.98]Ted,you know how at some point in the future,machines will rise up against us?
[17:39.98]Ted 你知道未来的某天 机器会统治人类?
[17:43.03]- Sure. - Okay.So,the machines--
[17:43.03]- 当然 - 好吧 那么机器--
[17:45.90]they've killed everybody,
[17:45.90]它们摧毁了全人类
[17:47.32]and all that's left is you,me,and Barney.
[17:47.32]只剩下你和我 还有Barney
[17:54.69]Which one of us would you,like...
[17:54.69]你会选哪一个 就像是...
[17:59.16]get with?
[17:59.16]一起生活?
[18:02.43]And,um...
[18:02.43]呣...
[18:03.98]why do I have to get with one of you?
[18:03.98]我为啥要跟你们其中一个生活?
[18:06.72]The machines are forcing you.
[18:06.72]那些机器强迫你
[18:08.10]They want to watch. That's just how they get down.
[18:08.10]它们想要围观一下 它们就这个风格
[18:11.27]Oh,that's a... that's a... That's a tough one.
[18:11.27]哦 那真是... 真是...真是个难题
[18:14.06]I guess it would have to be...
[18:14.06]我想如果非得选的话...
[18:19.50]Holly.
[18:19.50]选Holly
[18:21.80]Robin told me what you guys did.
[18:21.80]Robin告诉我短信是你们发的
[18:23.28]That's why I made up the gay dreams thing.
[18:23.28]这就是为何我编造了同性恋春梦的事
[18:24.90]Uh,guys,this is Holly.
[18:24.90]伙计们 这就是Holly
[18:27.86]And I didn't wait your precious three days to call her.
[18:27.86]我没有按照你们说的 等上宝贵的三天再联系她
[18:30.50]I knew where she worked,so I tracked her down.
[18:30.50]我知道她工作的地方 便直接去找她
[18:32.86]Um,let me ask you. Did I call you too soon?
[18:32.86]让我来问问你 我给你打电话早了吗?
[18:35.04]I loved that he called me right away.
[18:35.04]我喜欢他立马给我电话
[18:37.59]I found it very romantic.
[18:37.59]我觉得很浪漫
[18:39.71]And by the way,I don't sit around my apartment reading architecture magazines
[18:39.71]顺便一提 我不会坐在公寓里读建筑杂志
[18:42.74]in my old cheerleader uniform.
[18:42.74]还穿着我的旧拉拉队服
[18:45.51]I do that completely naked.
[18:45.51]我都是裸着的
[18:52.13]So,uh,Holly and I are going out to dinner.
[18:52.13]那么 我和Holly要出去吃晚餐了
[18:54.58]- I'll meet you out front. - Okay.
[18:54.58]- 我在门口等你 - 好的
[18:58.53]I'm sorr bud. We-We were just trying to help you.
[18:58.53]抱歉伙计 我们只是想要帮你
[19:01.25]And,also,it was really fun.
[19:01.25]而且 这很有趣
[19:06.21]I don't need your help,okay? I can take care of myself.
[19:06.21]我不需要你们的帮助 好吧? 我自己能搞掂
[19:10.00]And,yeah,maybe...
[19:10.00]没错 也许...
[19:11.40]maybe there are some girls who wouldn't like it that I called them right away
[19:11.40]也许有些女孩子 不喜欢我立刻给她们打电话
[19:14.29]or said things too soon,but guess what?
[19:14.29]或者太早说爱她 但是知道吗?
[19:16.85]Those aren't the right girls for me.
[19:16.85]她们不是适合我的女孩
[19:19.32]Maybe the right girl is the one who loves that I do those thin
[19:19.32]也许适合我的女孩会喜欢我做的事
[19:22.58]because that's just who I am,and I'm not going to change because of some stupid Three Days Rule.
[19:22.58]因为这才是我 我不会因为愚蠢的3日原则而改变自己
[19:30.48]Oh,and,um,Holly spells her name with an "I."
[19:30.48]哦 还有Holly的名字其实是以"I"结尾的
[19:36.31]So I had proven that the Three Days Rule was wrong,and I was out to dinner with a pretty girl.
[19:36.31]我证明了3日法则是错误的 并和一个美女去吃晚餐
[19:41.40]And until right now,I've never told anyone the truth about what happened on that date.
[19:41.40]直到今日 我都没有跟人提过那晚发生了什么
[19:45.65]That's so funny! I love indie music,too.
[19:45.65]太有趣了! 我也喜欢印度音乐
[19:48.32]We should get married.
[19:48.32]咱俩真该结婚
[19:50.81]Just kidding. Or am I?
[19:50.81]开玩笑的 或者我确实这么想的?
[19:54.61]Just kidding again.
[19:54.61]还是开玩笑
[19:56.18]That's it. We're totally going to Brazil together!
[19:56.18]没错 我们真该一起去巴西!
[19:58.38]And I went to my doctor this morning,and he said it is all cleared up,so I'm good to go.
[19:58.38]今早我去见了医生 他说我都康复了 我可以走了
[20:03.03]I think I'm in love with you,Ted.
[20:03.03]我想我爱上你了 Ted
[20:04.96]In the end,I didn't need to wait three days,but Holly really,really did.
[20:04.96]最后 我不需要等上3天 需要等的人是Holly
[20:10.40]Like a lot of rules,there are times to follow them and times to not.
[20:10.40]正如许多的规矩一样 有时我们需要遵守 有时未必
[20:14.44]But I will tell you this.
[20:14.44]但我要告诉你们
[20:16.38]When I got your mother's number,I called her right away.
[20:16.38]当我拿到你们老妈的号码 我立马打给了她
[20:23.55]- Stan! - Hey,fellas.
[20:23.55]- Stan! - 嘿 伙计们
[20:25.95]- Stan,aren't you working? - Took the night off.
[20:25.95]- Stan 你不用上班? - 今晚休息
[20:28.17]- That's great! We can all hang out! - Yeah.
[20:28.17]- 太棒了! 咱们可以出去啦! - 没错
[20:29.89]Uh,I can't. Got a date.
[20:29.89]不行 我有约了
[20:32.52]- You ready,baby? - Yup.
[20:32.52]- 可以走了吗 宝贝? - 走吧
[20:34.23]What the...
[20:34.23]搞什么...
[20:35.58]Wait,wait. Couldn't you guys just stay here and do your date with us?
[20:35.58]等等 你们俩不能留下来 跟我们一起约会吗?
[20:39.40]Yeah,it'll be fun! Look,I'm laughing!
[20:39.40]没错 这会很有趣的! 看 我都在笑了!
[20:42.68]It's fun here! You like magic?
[20:42.68]这儿很有趣! 你喜欢魔术吗?
[20:45.10]Fellas,it-it's time we said good-bye.
[20:45.10]伙计们 我们该说再见了
[20:48.59]I mean,we shared a very special afternoon together,and that's something I will always cherish.
[20:48.59]我们曾在一起度过一个愉快的下午 这是我不会忘记的趣事
[20:53.23]I'll never forget you guys.
[20:53.23]我不会忘了你们的
[20:56.06]- Do you even know their mes? - No idea. Is the tall one Ted?
[20:56.06]- 你知道他们的名字吗? - 不知道 那高个是Ted吗?
[20:58.52]No. That's Marshall. He's married to Lily.
[20:58.52]不 那是Marshall 他跟Lily结婚了
[21:00.65]- Okay. You like chicken wings? - Oh,yeah.
[21:00.65]- 好吧 你喜欢吃鸡翅吗? - 喜欢
[00:01.19]好吧 回去我打给你
[00:03.80]- I hope you do. - All right.
[00:03.80]- 要记得哦 - 没问题
[00:08.23]Look at this.
[00:08.23]瞧瞧呀
[00:09.39]I just got that girl's number. Check it out.
[00:09.39]我刚刚拿到那美女号码了 你们看
[00:12.08]Holly. Nice.
[00:12.08]叫Holly 干得好
[00:14.54]Girls whose names end in L-Y are always dirty.
[00:14.54]女生名字要是以ly结尾 通常都很浪
[00:18.34]Holly,Kelly,Carly,Lily.
[00:18.34]比如说Holly Kelly Carly Lily
[00:23.65]Oh,yeah,I know it's true.
[00:23.65]倒也没说错
[00:25.98]And don't even get me started on girlshose names should end in Y,
[00:25.98]更别说那些本以为是名字以Y结尾
[00:30.35]but instead end in I.
[00:30.35]其实是以I结尾的女生
[00:32.22]Those girls are like roller coasters.
[00:32.22]搭上她们就像坐过山车那样
[00:34.67]You got to wait in a long line,but once you get up there,
[00:34.67]你得排一长条队 可等你上车后
[00:36.94]you just hold on for dear life and hope you don't drop your keys.
[00:36.94]你只会感叹想要抓住美好的人生 希望别掉链子
[00:40.44]Hey,you know what I'm gonna do?
[00:40.44]知道我要怎么做吗?
[00:41.63]I'm gonna call her right now.
[00:41.63]我现在就打给她
[00:43.48]I'm gonna do that whole,"Hey,remember me? It's been so long."
[00:43.48]我要跟她讲 "嘿 还记得我吧? 有一阵子没见了"
[00:48.24]See,it's funny because I just saw her.
[00:48.24]很有趣吧 因为我刚刚才见过她
[00:50.10]Dude,you can't call her.
[00:50.10]兄弟 不能打给她
[00:51.44]You have to wait three days to call a woman. That's the rule.
[00:51.44]你得三天后才能打给她 这是规矩
[00:54.15]Barney,that rule is completely played out.
[00:54.15]Barney 这规矩已经过时了
[00:56.11]Girls know exactly what you're doing.
[00:56.11]女生们都知道你在想什么
[00:57.53]Hey,I got a new rule.
[00:57.53]嘿 我来创造个新规矩
[00:59.75]It's kind of crazy,but I call it,You like her,you call her.
[00:59.75]虽然有点不着调 我把它叫做 "喜欢她 就打给她"
[01:04.35]I'm sorry. Can you repeat that? I don't speak I Never Get Laid.
[01:04.35]不好意思 能再说一次吗? 我不太懂"钓不到妞"语
[01:08.78]Barney,the Three Days Rule is insane.
[01:08.78]Barney 三天之约太愚蠢了
[01:11.36]I mean,who even came up with that?
[01:11.36]你说 谁提出来的?
[01:14.64]Jesus.
[01:14.64]耶稣
[01:16.13]Barney,don't do this. Not with Jesus.
[01:16.13]Barney 别这样 别把耶稣扯进来
[01:18.93]Seriously. Jesus started the whole wait-three-days thing.
[01:18.93]我认真的 三天之约确实是耶稣创造的
[01:22.98]He waited three days to come back to life.
[01:22.98]他被钉死第三天才复活的
[01:25.29]It was perfect.
[01:25.29]这才完美嘛
[01:26.32]If he have only waited one day,a lot of people wouldn't have even heard that he died.
[01:26.32]要是他等一天就复活 很多人甚至都不知道他的死讯
[01:29.89]They'd be all,"Hey,Jesus,what up?"
[01:29.89]不知情的就跟他打招呼 "嘿 耶稣 吃了饭没?"
[01:32.38]And Jesus would probably be,like,"What up? I died yesterday."
[01:32.38]耶稣可能就会这么说 "吃啥饭呀? 我昨儿个死了"
[01:36.66]And then they'd be all,Uh,you look pretty alive to me,dude.
[01:36.66]而其他人就说 "呃 我看你还挺鲜活的呀 兄弟"
[01:40.28]And then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected and how it was a miracle.
[01:40.28]然后耶稣就得跟他们解释 他是怎么奇迹般地复活的
[01:44.06]And then,the dude would be,like,Uh,okay,whatever you say,bro.
[01:44.06]那些家伙就会说"好了 兄弟你就吹吧"
[01:48.56]Wow,ancient dialogue sounds so stilted now.
[01:48.56]古人说话咋这么做作
[01:51.65]And he's not going to come back on a Saturday.
[01:51.65]然而他要星期六复活也不成 (耶稣星期日复活)
[01:53.65]Everybody's busy doing chores.
[01:53.65]大家都忙着家务事呢
[01:56.14]Working the loom,trimming their beards. No.
[01:56.14]他们都在家织布 修胡须 复活可不成 (犹太人星期六不工作)
[01:58.98]He waits the exact right number of days... Three.
[01:58.98]他等到最适合的时间... 第三天
[02:03.63]Okay,I promise-- I'll wait three days. Just please stop talking.
[02:03.63]好了 我保证第三天才打电话 拜托咱们转话题吧
[02:07.87]Plus,it's Sunday,so everyone's in church already.
[02:07.87]还有 那时是星期日 大家都在教堂呢
[02:10.98]They're all in there,Oh,no,Jesus is dead.
[02:10.98]在教堂见到耶稣 说"不 耶稣竟然死了"
[02:14.44]Then,bam! He bursts through the back door,runs up the aisle.
[02:14.44]然后 砰! 他推开后门 穿过走廊
[02:18.43]Everyone's totally psyched.
[02:18.43]大家都激动死了
[02:19.74]And,FYI,that's when he invented the high-five.
[02:19.74]还有 你要知道 击掌就是在那时发明的
[02:23.07]Three days,Ted.
[02:23.07]三天 Ted
[02:24.53]We wait three days to call a woman because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait.
[02:24.53]三天后再打给那女生 因为耶稣要我们等三天
[02:32.32]True story.
[02:32.32]我可是说真的
[02:45.65]How I Met Your Mother Season04 Episode21
[02:45.65]老爸老妈浪漫史 第四季 第21集
[02:47.65]Okay,fine. I promise,I won't call Holly for three days.
[02:47.65]好吧 我保证三天后再打给Holly
[02:52.04]But I never said anything about texting.
[02:52.04]可我没说不能发短信
[02:54.77]I started things off with something cute and charming.
[02:54.77]我发了一条可爱又迷人的短信
[02:57.70]"I was thinking about you,so I thought I'd send you a little texty text."
[02:57.70]"我正想你呢 所以给你发条小短信"
[03:01.99]And the moment I hit "Send," I realized it wasn't cute at all.
[03:01.99]在我手指按上"发送"之时 我意识到这一点都不可爱
[03:06.55]texty text
[03:06.55]小短信
[03:06.55]It was the lamest thing anyone has ever said to anyone.
[03:06.55]对别人说这话 真是丢脸死了
[03:10.01]And the worst thing about texting is that once you send it...
[03:10.01]而发短信最大的缺点 就是一旦你发了出去...
[03:15.80]Oh,no! No!
[03:15.80]别! 别跑!
[03:19.59]you can never get it back.
[03:19.59]就覆水难收了
[03:21.78]And then... you wait.
[03:21.78]然后...你就等着回信
[03:22.59]******
[03:22.59]23分钟后
[03:24.36]And just when you've decided never to text anyone again...
[03:24.36]就在你决定再也不给别人发短信的同时
[03:29.46]"I've been thinking about you,too,
[03:29.46]"我也在想着你呢"
[03:31.79]"and how weird is it that you texted me while I was in the bath?"
[03:31.79]"收到短信时我就躺在浴缸 很奇怪吧?"
[03:42.33]- What was that? - What?
[03:42.33]- 你怎么了? - 啥?
[03:43.81]- You made a noise. - That was my phone. I got a text.
[03:43.81]- 你发出了奇怪的声音 - 是我的手机 我收到短信了
[03:46.87]- Not that. You made your naked lady noise. - What?
[03:46.87]- 不是说那个 你发出了裸女之声 - 啥?
[03:49.98]Whenever you see a naked lady,you make the noise.
[03:49.98]每次你见到裸女 就会发出这种声音
[03:56.10]I don't do that.
[03:56.10]才不是呢
[03:57.44]Really?
[03:57.44]真的吗?
[04:00.91]Oh,God,sorry,Lily.
[04:00.91]不好意思 Lily
[04:07.62]While the men are out hunting,the women of New Guinea's indigenous Korowai tribe
[04:07.62]家里的男人都出去打猎了 新几内亚Korowai部落的女人
[04:11.51]wash their clothes in the river.
[04:11.51]就会在河边洗衣服
[04:21.10]That's totally a boob.
[04:21.10]这肯定是胸部
[04:24.94]Is that Holly who keeps texting you?
[04:24.94]是那个Holly给你发短信吗?
[04:26.87]Didn't you promise to wait three days?
[04:26.87]你不是保证过要等三天吗?
[04:28.59]To call,yes. Texting is totally different.
[04:28.59]不打电话嘛 发短信可不同
[04:31.53]Okay,well,just try to keep the naked lady noises to a minimum.
[04:31.53]随你了 只要把裸女之声调到最低就好
[04:34.79]I don't make a naked lady noise.
[04:34.79]我没有发出裸女之声
[04:38.67]Really?
[04:38.67]真的?
[04:46.25]Holly and I stayed up texting until 2:00 in the morning.
[04:46.25]我和Holly互发短信直到凌晨2点
[04:50.46]And we spent the whole next day texting each other,too.
[04:50.46]第二天我们也发了一整天短信
[04:54.07]She seemed perfect.
[04:54.07]她真的很棒
[04:57.03]Holly just told me what she's wearing right now.
[04:57.03]Holly刚跟我说她现在穿着什么
[05:00.07]It is pretty hot.
[05:00.07]可真辣呀
[05:01.63]Yeah,whatever it is,I can guarantee you she's not wearing it.
[05:01.63]不管是什么 我向你保证 她没说真话
[05:04.70]She's lying to you to make you like her.
[05:04.70]她在说谎 好让你喜欢她
[05:06.26]- How do you know that? - Here. Come here.
[05:06.26]- 你怎么知道? - 拿来
[05:09.03]Because no woman in the history of the world is ever
[05:09.03]因为史上从来没有女孩会
[05:11.63]"just sitting around reading architecture magazines in my old cheerleader uniform."
[05:11.63]"穿着以前的啦啦队制服 静静坐着看建筑杂志"
[05:17.56]Okay,maybe she's lying about the architecture magazines.
[05:17.56]好吧 或许看建筑杂志那是假的
[05:25.83]Oh,no.
[05:25.83]噢 不
[05:27.38]- Oh,no. This is bad. - What?
[05:27.38]- 噢 不 坏菜了 - 怎么了?
[05:29.67]She just sent me a text that was clearly meant for someone else.
[05:29.67]她刚刚发了条短信 明显收信人就不该是我
[05:34.76]"Hey,baby,I picked up some take-out from Generro's. Be home soon."
[05:34.76]"亲爱的 我去Generro那儿带点外卖 很快回来"
[05:39.17]Okay,yes,this sounds bad,but let's think about this,okay?
[05:39.17]听起来不太妙 不过往好的方面想
[05:42.57]It could be for a brother or maybe her sick dad.
[05:42.57]可能是她兄弟 或者是有个病了的爸爸
[05:46.44]Scroll down.
[05:46.44]继续看
[05:49.23]"And then I want you to do me on the couch."
[05:49.23]"然后我要你在沙发上干我"
[05:53.79]Okay,maybe not a sick dad.
[05:53.79]好吧 不一定是个病老爸
[05:56.39]Or a very sick dad. Am I right?
[05:56.39]可能是个变态老爸 对吧?
[06:01.74]Sorry.
[06:01.74]对不起
[06:04.34]Hey,guys.
[06:04.34]大伙儿
[06:07.25]God. What is this?
[06:07.25]这是啥?
[06:09.95]It's just some take-out from Generro's. I'm bringing it home for Lily.
[06:09.95]Generro's那儿的外卖 给Lily带的
[06:12.64]Oh,that's weird.
[06:12.64]奇怪了
[06:14.10]Holly just texted Ted something about take-out from Generro's.
[06:14.10]Holly刚给Ted发了条短信 要去Generro's那儿带外卖
[06:19.66]Wait a second.
[06:19.66]等等
[06:21.79]- You sons of bitches. - What?
[06:21.79]- 你们俩混蛋 - 怎么了?
[06:25.35]You're Holly.
[06:25.35]你们就是Holly
[06:30.78]So Ted hasn't been texting Holly at all?
[06:30.78]这么说给Ted发短信的人不是Holly?
[06:33.80]He's been texting you two?
[06:33.80]他一直在跟你们发短信?
[06:35.43]Look,we knew he'd try to call her before the three days,so I swiped his phone,
[06:35.43]我们就知道他忍不了三天 所以我偷了他电话
[06:39.75]and I changed her number to my work cell.
[06:39.75]把那女生的号码换为我的工作手机号码
[06:42.42]We were just gonna bust on him for calling her too soon,but then he started texting her.
[06:42.42]我们只是想抓到他不遵守规矩 没想到他给她竟然发短信
[06:49.34]Texty text?
[06:49.34]小短信?
[06:51.43]Oh,Ted.
[06:51.43]噢 Ted
[06:52.75]Oh,poor,sweet Ted. We should... we should tell him it's us.
[06:52.75]可怜的Ted呀 咱们--咱们得告诉他这是我们
[06:57.04]Yeah. Or...
[06:57.04]好 又或者...
[06:59.43]we pretend we're Holly,and we're in the bath.
[06:59.43]我们装作是Holly 现在躺在浴缸
[07:03.77]Yeah,that's better.
[07:03.77]这主意更好
[07:11.21]Well,that was fun.
[07:11.21]真好玩
[07:12.83]We should tell him that it's us.
[07:12.83]我们还是告诉他真相吧
[07:14.13]Yeah,we should. Or...
[07:14.13]应该的 又或者...
[07:17.05]we tell him our favorite color is red,and we think the cowboy look is very sexy.
[07:17.05]我们跟他说红色是咱们的最爱 还有牛仔装扮非常性感
[07:22.89]Yeah,that's better.
[07:22.89]不错
[07:25.63]I'm wearing them right now,and they do look sexy.
[07:25.63]穿着呢 没错 真的很性感
[07:31.11]- He put on the boots! - He totally put on the boots!
[07:31.11]- 他穿上了那双靴子! - 他真的穿上了那双靴子!
[07:35.33]- That was awesome! - Yeah.
[07:35.33]- 帅呀! - 对呀
[07:36.98]But it's time to tell him who he really put those boots on for.
[07:36.98]不过是时候告诉他是谁在玩他了
[07:40.71]Yeah. Or...
[07:40.71]没错 又或者...
[07:43.08]we just took off our shirt.
[07:43.08]说美女正宽衣解带
[07:46.01]Yeah,that's better.
[07:46.01]不错
[07:48.62]You think maybe we're wearing a black lace bra underneath?
[07:48.62]你说咱们穿着黑色蕾丝胸罩打底好不?
[07:54.03]I don't think we're wearing anything underneath.
[07:54.03]我觉得咱们不应该打底
[07:56.32]God,we're hot.
[07:56.32]老天 咱们真辣
[08:00.50]Now he's only wearing the cowboy boots! It is on!
[08:00.50]现在他只穿着那双牛仔靴子了! 好戏上场了!
[08:04.01]It is so on! Okay,okay,tell him that we're...
[08:04.01]来吧来吧! 好 咱们这么说...
[08:06.10]we're slowing slipping out of our...
[08:06.10]咱们慢慢地褪下...
[08:10.94]What are we doing?
[08:10.94]咱们在干嘛呢?
[08:14.82]I think that we're about to have sex with Ted.
[08:14.82]我估计咱们要跟Ted电话做爱了
[08:22.90]So,you did this to him all day? That's just mean.
[08:22.90]你们就这么一整天地耍他? 太过分了
[08:26.45]No,no. No,it was... It was actually for his own good.
[08:26.45]不...这样是为了他好
[08:30.07]We're protecting him from himself.
[08:30.07]我们在保护他不被自己所伤害
[08:31.62]He... No. He really likes this girl.
[08:31.62]他...他真的喜欢这女孩
[08:33.28]He had that-that look in his eye.
[08:33.28]从他的眼神能看出来
[08:34.98]Yeah,that crazy "I'm about to move too fast and screw this up" look.
[08:34.98]对 那种"我会进展过快而搞砸"的眼神
[08:39.17]It was actually the same look he had on his first date with you.
[08:39.17]这跟与你第一次约会的眼神是一样的
[08:41.70]- And we all remember how that went. - Yeah.
[08:41.70]- 大家都记得最后怎样了吧 - 没错
[08:44.40]- I think I'm in love with you. - What?
[08:44.40]- 我爱上你了 - 啥?
[08:47.42]Yeah,well,I-I think I was a special case.
[08:47.42]嗯 我-我觉得自己是个特别的例子
[08:50.38]This Holly is no Robin Scherbatsky.
[08:50.38]这个Holly可不是Robin Scherbatsky
[08:53.98]Hey,what is the deal with her hair?
[08:53.98]嘿 她头发是怎么回事?
[08:55.37]I mean,news flash: they make conditioners that don't leave a buildup.
[08:55.37]最新消息:就跟现在的空调一样偷工减料
[09:00.22]I'm so b.
[09:00.22]我太坏了
[09:01.86]Look,it's been a while since Ted really liked someone.
[09:01.86]听着 Ted很久没这么喜欢过一个人了
[09:04.69]He's clearly got a lot of crazy stored up. We just...
[09:04.69]他隐忍了很久 我们只是...
[09:07.23]we thought we'd get him to say "I love you" before he even makes contact with this girl.
[09:07.23]我们想让他说"我爱你"之前 起码能了解下这个女孩
[09:11.11]And you can tell it's on the way. He's exhibiting all the telltale signs.
[09:11.11]你跟她继续说 我拿证据出来
[09:14.29]Yeah. One: He joked about getting married.
[09:14.29]第一:他拿结婚开玩笑
[09:17.33]"You like architecture? We should get married." "Ha-ha.LOL."
[09:17.33]"你喜欢建筑师? 咱们结婚吧" "哈哈 LOL." (laugh out loud简写 大声地笑)
[09:22.20]"Just kidding. Question mark?"
[09:22.20]"开玩笑的啦 问号"
[09:25.04]Two: He made a crazy way-too-soon trip suggestion.
[09:25.04]第二:他太单刀直入了
[09:29.05]"I like beer,too. We should totally go to Germany together."
[09:29.05]"我也喜欢啤酒 咱们一起去德国吧"
[09:32.64]"LOL.JK.LOL."
[09:32.64]"LOL.JK.LOL." (just kidding简写 开玩笑)
[09:37.01]And three: He got way too personal way too soon.
[09:37.01]第三:他太快进入私人话题
[09:40.90]"Yeah,my parents got divorced a couple years back.
[09:40.90]"我父母几年前离婚了
[09:44.02]It was really tough." LOL."
[09:44.02]那时我很难过" "LOL."
[09:48.24]And he clearly doesn't know what LOL means.
[09:48.24]他肯定不知道LOL啥意思吧
[09:50.58]Yeah,but here's the real problem.
[09:50.58]还有个更严重的问题
[09:51.93]Ted wasn't saying "I love you" as easily as we thought he would.
[09:51.93]Ted没我们想象中容易说"我爱你"
[09:55.67]Then we met... Stan.
[09:55.67]直到我们遇到...Stan
[10:04.80]Why are you making so much noise,man?
[10:04.80]吵吵啥呀? 伙计
[10:08.29]So we explained everything to him,and when we were done,something amazing happened.
[10:08.29]我们就跟他解释咯 解释完后 有趣的事情发生了
[10:14.01]Why don't you tell Ted that just knowing he's out there,thinking about you,
[10:14.01]不如你们跟Ted说 他能想着你们
[10:17.58]caring about you,makes you feel safe?
[10:17.58]关心你们 让你们有安全感很开心?
[10:20.74]So,all your fears,all your yesterdays wash away,
[10:20.74]你们的恐惧 往事统统赶走
[10:23.90]and only hope remains in the promise of his embrace.
[10:23.90]希望就留在他承诺的怀抱中
[10:30.47]Go,Stan. Who is this guy?
[10:30.47]Stan好家伙 他谁呀?
[10:32.93]He's a security guard who works nights.
[10:32.93]他是个夜班的保安
[10:34.35]And he eats lunch at MacLaren's every day.
[10:34.35]他每天都在Maclaren's吃午饭
[10:36.14]- And he wasn't done. - Not by a long shot.
[10:36.14]- 他还没说完 - 喝了点小酒后
[10:39.05]You make me thank God for every mistake I ever made
[10:39.05]你让我为自己犯下的每个错误 都心怀感激
[10:41.81]because each one led me down the path that brought me to you.
[10:41.81]因为它们把我带到你身边
[10:46.46]That's,uh,really nice,man.
[10:46.46]你真好 兄弟
[10:49.10]Whatever. It's okay.
[10:49.10]管他呢 挺好的
[10:52.37]"And when finally come together,"I want you to hold me.
[10:52.37]"当相遇那一天终于来临 我想要你抱着我"
[10:56.08]Hold me" "all night. Stroke my hair."
[10:56.08]"整晚的抱着我 抚摸着我的秀发"
[10:59.49]"Tell me I'm a woman and show me you're a man.
[10:59.49]"让我知道自己是个弱女子 而你是个真男人"
[11:02.62]Until there there was only now."
[11:02.62]"矢志不渝"
[11:04.76]You and I... and now."
[11:04.76]"你和我...尽在此刻"
[11:09.17]Yes!
[11:09.17]我愿意!
[11:11.96]You want me to text that to Ted. I know that.
[11:11.96]你想让我把这些话发给Ted 我明白了
[11:17.52]"I do not ask "of the night explanations.
[11:17.52]"我不需要你今晚做出决定
[11:20.15]I wait for it,and it envelops me,"
[11:20.15]我愿意等 而这感觉拥抱着我"
[11:23.03]"and so you and bread and light and shadow are."
[11:23.03]"而我也被你被面包和阳光以及阴影围绕"
[11:29.65]That's Pablo Neruda.
[11:29.65]这是诗人Pablo Neruda写的
[11:31.87]I don't know,um,what bread was doing in there,
[11:31.87]我不知道干嘛会提到面包
[11:34.85]but that touched me here and here.
[11:34.85]但这些话真的打动我的这里和这里
[11:40.50]Well,if Ted won't say it,I will.
[11:40.50]好吧 如果Ted不愿说这番话 我替他会说的
[11:44.18]I love you.
[11:44.18]我爱你
[11:47.86]That's cool.
[11:47.86]很好
[11:51.39]Still nothing,huh?
[11:51.39]还是没回复 啊?
[11:52.78]Maybe he's not in love with us.
[11:52.78]可能他并不爱我们吧
[11:54.21]How can he not be in love with us? We're everything he's looking for.
[11:54.21]他怎能不爱我们? 我们就是他苦苦寻找的一切
[11:56.94]I don't get men.
[11:56.94]我真搞不懂男人
[12:00.11]Got to head to work.
[12:00.11]我要回去工作了
[12:01.38]Will you be... Will you be back?
[12:01.38]你还会...还会回来吗?
[12:04.00]I'll be back when the wind and fates and chance bring me back.
[12:04.00]当风吹起 命运召唤我之时 我会回来的
[12:08.20]Which will be tomorrow.
[12:08.20]可能是明天吧
[12:10.11]It's cheese steak day.
[12:10.11]明天奶酪牛排搞特价
[12:14.50]It sounds like you were all over this guy.
[12:14.50]听着你们很迷这个大汉啊
[12:17.58]Hope his girlfriend didn't get jealous.
[12:17.58]希望他的女朋友不会吃醋
[12:19.92]Did he mention a girlfriend or...
[12:19.92]他有提到女朋友或者...
[12:23.32]It was all going great until Marshall sent Ted a text meant for Lily and ruined everything.
[12:23.32]一切进展顺利直到Marshall 把给Lily的短信误发给了Ted 全毁了
[12:28.53]Well,it doesn't matter. Okay? It's over now.
[12:28.53]没关系 知道吧 一切都结束了
[12:31.05]I got to get going,but here's what's going to happen:
[12:31.05]我要走了 但是你们得这么做:
[12:33.18]You're going to call him right now,tell him what you did,and apologize.
[12:33.18]你们赶紧打电话给他 坦白你们的恶作剧 向他道歉
[12:37.68]- You got it? - Yes.
[12:37.68]- 你们听清楚了吗? - 明白了
[12:43.07]Or...
[12:43.07]或者...
[12:45.13]Holly explained everything. It was all just a misunderstanding.
[12:45.13]Holly解释说那完全是个误会
[12:48.06]- Everything's great now. - Really?
[12:48.06]- 现在没事了 - 真的?
[12:50.47]Uh,how did,uh,Holly explain her way out of that one?
[12:50.47]那么Holly是怎么解释那件事的?
[12:53.43]Well,apparently,her dumb friend Marsha accidentally used her phone to text her husband Billy.
[12:53.43]事实上是她的蠢朋友Marsha 不小心用了她的手机给老公Billy发短信
[12:58.77]Marsha and Billy.
[12:58.77]Marsha和Billy
[13:00.33]No one sprained any muscles there.
[13:00.33]可真是天衣无缝啊
[13:03.29]And now we are better than ever.
[13:03.29]我们俩感情反而更好了
[13:05.95]Look,I know this sounds crazy,but I think I might actually be falling for this girl.
[13:05.95]看 虽然听起来很不可思议 但我觉得自己是爱上这个女孩了
[13:11.37]- You're falling for Barney and Marshall. - What?
[13:11.37]- 你是爱上了Barney和Marshall - 什么?
[13:14.47]They didn't believe that you could wait the three days,
[13:14.47]他们不相信你会等上3天
[13:17.24]so Barney changed her number in your phone to his work cell.
[13:17.24]所以Barney把你手机里她的号码 换成了自己的商务号码
[13:20.71]Holly is Barney and Marshall.
[13:20.71]Holly就是Barney和Marshall
[13:22.78]Wait. That whole time it was them?
[13:22.78]慢着 这全是他们搞的?
[13:26.07]So Holly wasn't in the bath?
[13:26.07]那么Holly没有躺在浴缸里?
[13:31.20]Or sitting by her window,looking up at the stars,thinking about me?
[13:31.20]没有坐在窗户边上 看着满天繁星 在想我?
[13:38.69]Or lounging in her old cheerleader uniform reading architecture magazines?
[13:38.69]也没有套上旧拉拉队服在读建筑杂志?
[13:46.54]Yeah. I don't think they actually did those things.
[13:46.54]对 我想他们都没做这些事
[13:49.13]They were just at the bar.
[13:49.13]他们只是待在酒吧里
[13:51.26]Right.
[13:51.26]没错
[13:52.44]But,yeah,it was them.
[13:52.44]没错 但就是他们搞的鬼
[13:55.11]- Unbelievab. - I know.
[13:55.11]- 真不敢相信 - 我明白
[13:57.17]So you might as well tell them you're on to them.
[13:57.17]你也可以跟他们说 你识破了他们的恶作剧
[13:59.15]Yeah. Or...
[13:59.15]对 或者...
[14:03.09]I text them something that will really mess with their heads.
[14:03.09]我给他们发一些让他们摸不着头脑的东西
[14:05.79]Oh,I gotcha. Okay. How about...
[14:05.79]哦 我明白了 比如说...
[14:10.42]"I haven't told any of my friends yet,but I only have three months to live?"
[14:10.42]"我没跟自己的朋友提起过 其实我只剩3个月的命了?"
[14:15.17]- Not bad. - Yeah.
[14:15.17]- 不错 - 对
[14:16.43]How about "I once killed a man with a shovel,and those feelings are creeping up again"?
[14:16.43]比如说 "我曾经拿铁铲杀了一个人 那种感觉似乎又回来了"?
[14:22.48]I-I liked that thing someone said before about having three months to live.
[14:22.48]我喜欢刚才有人提到的 只剩3月寿命的建议
[14:26.27]How about "I never told anyone this,but I slept with my best friend's mom"?
[14:26.27]比如说"我从未跟别人说过 但我和好友的妈妈上过床"?
[14:30.99]Oh,that is good,but I feel like we keep coming back to that three months to live thing.
[14:30.99]不错 但我更想接着回到只剩3个月可活的话题
[14:35.92]- Wait. I think I got it. - Oh,yeah?
[14:35.92]- 等等 我知道了 - 哦 真的?
[14:41.18]He texted back!
[14:41.18]他回短信了!
[14:43.45]"I probably shouldn't tell you this.
[14:43.45]"我本不该跟你说的"
[14:46.32]I mean we barely know each other."
[14:46.32]"我是说我们根本不了解彼此"
[14:49.32]But what the hell,I'll just say it.
[14:49.32]"但是管他呢 我还是想说"
[14:51.66]This is it,dude. Here comes the "I love you."
[14:51.66]来了来了 伙计 要说"我爱你"了
[14:54.38]- I sh Stan were here. - Stan.
[14:54.38]- 真希望Stan也在这儿 - Stan
[15:00.41]What?
[15:00.41]什么?
[15:02.18]I sometimes have gay dreams about my best friend.
[15:02.18]我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦
[15:10.95]I sometimes have gay dreams about my best friend.
[15:10.95]我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦
[15:15.13]Why in the world would Ted text a girl he barely knows that he sometimes has gay dreams about me?
[15:15.13]Ted到底为何会对一个陌生的女孩说 他有时会对我存有同性恋幻想?
[15:21.91]Slow your roll. You?
[15:21.91]慢着下结论 他指的是你?
[15:24.55]He's clearly talking about me.
[15:24.55]很明显他是在说我
[15:26.42]Dude,it's me. I'm his best friend.
[15:26.42]伙计 是我 我是他最好的哥们
[15:28.86]Okay,one: that has never been proven.
[15:28.86]好吧 第一:这从未得到证实
[15:30.96]Two: If anyone were to have gay dreams about one of us,it would be me.
[15:30.96]第二:如果有人会对我们其中一个 产生同性恋幻想 那也必然是对我
[15:35.64]I mean,look at me. Now look at you.
[15:35.64]看看我 再看看你自己
[15:38.33]A still-in-the-closet 80-year-old wouldn't be into that mess.
[15:38.33]即使是80岁的老古董也不会是 你这副德行
[15:43.14]Here's the thing,Barney. I'm snuggly. You're not.
[15:43.14]关键在于 Barney 我让人感觉温暖 而你不是
[15:46.56]Who wouldn't want to snuggle up next to this business on a Sunday morning?
[15:46.56]谁周日早上不想偎依在这结实的怀抱里?
[15:50.33]Wrapped in a comforter,and it's raining outside,and there's muffins warming in the oven.
[15:50.33]缠绕在胸膛里 就算窗外下着雨 烤炉里正热着松饼
[15:54.69]I'm cuddly,bitch. Deal with it.
[15:54.69]我就是如此居家 贱人 就是这样
[15:57.48]I work out every day.
[15:57.48]我每天都健身
[15:59.74]If there is one thing we know about Ted,it's that he likes a nice body.
[15:59.74]我们最了解Ted的莫过于他喜欢好身材
[16:03.55]This body would rock his world.
[16:03.55]这副身材会让他疯狂
[16:05.24]Ted and I have a history. I know what he likes.
[16:05.24]我和Ted结交多年 我知道他的喜好
[16:07.99]There are things I could do to him that would blow his mind...
[16:07.99]我能为他做的那些事 会让他失去理智...
[16:14.44]Why do we keep trying to have sex with Ted?
[16:14.44]为啥我们要抢着去和Ted嘿咻?
[16:16.24]I don't know. It's weird.
[16:16.24]我也不知道 太奇怪了
[16:18.42]Crazy,right?
[16:18.42]简直疯了 对吧?
[16:20.06]Ted's having gay dreams about me.
[16:20.06]Ted对我有同性恋幻想
[16:22.54]And by me,he means M-E,Marshall Eriksen,
[16:22.54]他所说的"我" 指的是M-E Marshall Eriksen
[16:26.66]star of Ted's gay dreams.
[16:26.66]Ted同性恋春梦里的情人
[16:29.38]Who cares? So Ted has gay dreams about one of you guys.
[16:29.38]管他呢 就是说Ted同性恋春梦梦到你们其中一个
[16:32.55]It's not like you found out he has three months to live.
[16:32.55]而不是你们发现他只剩3个月的寿命
[16:36.21]That's like,oh,shocking,right?
[16:36.21]这真是 太震惊了 对吧?
[16:39.88]Hey,look at this guy.
[16:39.88]嘿 瞧瞧这小子
[16:41.68]How's it going,uh,best friend of 12 years?
[16:41.68]今天还好吧? 12年的好朋友
[16:45.31]Well,it's kind of weird,but,uh,I had this crazy dream the other night.
[16:45.31]感觉很奇怪 但是我昨晚做了个疯狂的梦
[16:50.98]It's a little embarrassing.
[16:50.98]真令人尴尬
[16:52.24]You can tell us,Ted. This is a safe space.
[16:52.24]你可以告诉我们 Ted 这里很安全
[16:54.93]ah,your feelings are perfectly natural,buddy.
[16:54.93]你的感觉是很正常的 伙计
[16:57.73]Okay. Here's what happened. So I'm at...
[16:57.73]好吧 事情是这样的 那么我当时在...
[17:01.70]And then I proceeded to waste a half hour of those bastards' lives,
[17:01.70]于是我浪费了这俩混蛋半小时的时间
[17:05.29]telling them about this dream I had
[17:05.29]告诉他们我的梦
[17:06.73]where I ate dinner with my top five favorite architects throughout history.
[17:06.73]梦里我跟最喜欢的5位建筑师一起吃饭
[17:10.56]And then,at the end of the meal,Frank Gehry slides the check over to I.M.Pei,
[17:10.56]最后吃完饭 Frank Gehry把账单推给I.M.Pei
[17:14.93]and he says,Buddy,tonight,your name is I.M.Paying.
[17:14.93]他说 伙计 今晚你就是"付账先生"了 (与其名字谐音)
[17:20.88]Buckminster Fuller almost did a spit take.
[17:20.88]Buckminster Fuller差点喷饭了
[17:25.64]And then I woke up.
[17:25.64]然后我就醒了
[17:28.79]So,that-that's it?
[17:28.79]那么 就这样?
[17:30.95]No other dreams?
[17:30.95]没做别的梦?
[17:32.87]- Nothing confusing or erotic? - Nope.
[17:32.87]- 迷乱或者色情的梦呢? - 没有
[17:38.40]Okay,how about this?
[17:38.40]好吧 这么说吧
[17:39.98]Ted,you know how at some point in the future,machines will rise up against us?
[17:39.98]Ted 你知道未来的某天 机器会统治人类?
[17:43.03]- Sure. - Okay.So,the machines--
[17:43.03]- 当然 - 好吧 那么机器--
[17:45.90]they've killed everybody,
[17:45.90]它们摧毁了全人类
[17:47.32]and all that's left is you,me,and Barney.
[17:47.32]只剩下你和我 还有Barney
[17:54.69]Which one of us would you,like...
[17:54.69]你会选哪一个 就像是...
[17:59.16]get with?
[17:59.16]一起生活?
[18:02.43]And,um...
[18:02.43]呣...
[18:03.98]why do I have to get with one of you?
[18:03.98]我为啥要跟你们其中一个生活?
[18:06.72]The machines are forcing you.
[18:06.72]那些机器强迫你
[18:08.10]They want to watch. That's just how they get down.
[18:08.10]它们想要围观一下 它们就这个风格
[18:11.27]Oh,that's a... that's a... That's a tough one.
[18:11.27]哦 那真是... 真是...真是个难题
[18:14.06]I guess it would have to be...
[18:14.06]我想如果非得选的话...
[18:19.50]Holly.
[18:19.50]选Holly
[18:21.80]Robin told me what you guys did.
[18:21.80]Robin告诉我短信是你们发的
[18:23.28]That's why I made up the gay dreams thing.
[18:23.28]这就是为何我编造了同性恋春梦的事
[18:24.90]Uh,guys,this is Holly.
[18:24.90]伙计们 这就是Holly
[18:27.86]And I didn't wait your precious three days to call her.
[18:27.86]我没有按照你们说的 等上宝贵的三天再联系她
[18:30.50]I knew where she worked,so I tracked her down.
[18:30.50]我知道她工作的地方 便直接去找她
[18:32.86]Um,let me ask you. Did I call you too soon?
[18:32.86]让我来问问你 我给你打电话早了吗?
[18:35.04]I loved that he called me right away.
[18:35.04]我喜欢他立马给我电话
[18:37.59]I found it very romantic.
[18:37.59]我觉得很浪漫
[18:39.71]And by the way,I don't sit around my apartment reading architecture magazines
[18:39.71]顺便一提 我不会坐在公寓里读建筑杂志
[18:42.74]in my old cheerleader uniform.
[18:42.74]还穿着我的旧拉拉队服
[18:45.51]I do that completely naked.
[18:45.51]我都是裸着的
[18:52.13]So,uh,Holly and I are going out to dinner.
[18:52.13]那么 我和Holly要出去吃晚餐了
[18:54.58]- I'll meet you out front. - Okay.
[18:54.58]- 我在门口等你 - 好的
[18:58.53]I'm sorr bud. We-We were just trying to help you.
[18:58.53]抱歉伙计 我们只是想要帮你
[19:01.25]And,also,it was really fun.
[19:01.25]而且 这很有趣
[19:06.21]I don't need your help,okay? I can take care of myself.
[19:06.21]我不需要你们的帮助 好吧? 我自己能搞掂
[19:10.00]And,yeah,maybe...
[19:10.00]没错 也许...
[19:11.40]maybe there are some girls who wouldn't like it that I called them right away
[19:11.40]也许有些女孩子 不喜欢我立刻给她们打电话
[19:14.29]or said things too soon,but guess what?
[19:14.29]或者太早说爱她 但是知道吗?
[19:16.85]Those aren't the right girls for me.
[19:16.85]她们不是适合我的女孩
[19:19.32]Maybe the right girl is the one who loves that I do those thin
[19:19.32]也许适合我的女孩会喜欢我做的事
[19:22.58]because that's just who I am,and I'm not going to change because of some stupid Three Days Rule.
[19:22.58]因为这才是我 我不会因为愚蠢的3日原则而改变自己
[19:30.48]Oh,and,um,Holly spells her name with an "I."
[19:30.48]哦 还有Holly的名字其实是以"I"结尾的
[19:36.31]So I had proven that the Three Days Rule was wrong,and I was out to dinner with a pretty girl.
[19:36.31]我证明了3日法则是错误的 并和一个美女去吃晚餐
[19:41.40]And until right now,I've never told anyone the truth about what happened on that date.
[19:41.40]直到今日 我都没有跟人提过那晚发生了什么
[19:45.65]That's so funny! I love indie music,too.
[19:45.65]太有趣了! 我也喜欢印度音乐
[19:48.32]We should get married.
[19:48.32]咱俩真该结婚
[19:50.81]Just kidding. Or am I?
[19:50.81]开玩笑的 或者我确实这么想的?
[19:54.61]Just kidding again.
[19:54.61]还是开玩笑
[19:56.18]That's it. We're totally going to Brazil together!
[19:56.18]没错 我们真该一起去巴西!
[19:58.38]And I went to my doctor this morning,and he said it is all cleared up,so I'm good to go.
[19:58.38]今早我去见了医生 他说我都康复了 我可以走了
[20:03.03]I think I'm in love with you,Ted.
[20:03.03]我想我爱上你了 Ted
[20:04.96]In the end,I didn't need to wait three days,but Holly really,really did.
[20:04.96]最后 我不需要等上3天 需要等的人是Holly
[20:10.40]Like a lot of rules,there are times to follow them and times to not.
[20:10.40]正如许多的规矩一样 有时我们需要遵守 有时未必
[20:14.44]But I will tell you this.
[20:14.44]但我要告诉你们
[20:16.38]When I got your mother's number,I called her right away.
[20:16.38]当我拿到你们老妈的号码 我立马打给了她
[20:23.55]- Stan! - Hey,fellas.
[20:23.55]- Stan! - 嘿 伙计们
[20:25.95]- Stan,aren't you working? - Took the night off.
[20:25.95]- Stan 你不用上班? - 今晚休息
[20:28.17]- That's great! We can all hang out! - Yeah.
[20:28.17]- 太棒了! 咱们可以出去啦! - 没错
[20:29.89]Uh,I can't. Got a date.
[20:29.89]不行 我有约了
[20:32.52]- You ready,baby? - Yup.
[20:32.52]- 可以走了吗 宝贝? - 走吧
[20:34.23]What the...
[20:34.23]搞什么...
[20:35.58]Wait,wait. Couldn't you guys just stay here and do your date with us?
[20:35.58]等等 你们俩不能留下来 跟我们一起约会吗?
[20:39.40]Yeah,it'll be fun! Look,I'm laughing!
[20:39.40]没错 这会很有趣的! 看 我都在笑了!
[20:42.68]It's fun here! You like magic?
[20:42.68]这儿很有趣! 你喜欢魔术吗?
[20:45.10]Fellas,it-it's time we said good-bye.
[20:45.10]伙计们 我们该说再见了
[20:48.59]I mean,we shared a very special afternoon together,and that's something I will always cherish.
[20:48.59]我们曾在一起度过一个愉快的下午 这是我不会忘记的趣事
[20:53.23]I'll never forget you guys.
[20:53.23]我不会忘了你们的
[20:56.06]- Do you even know their mes? - No idea. Is the tall one Ted?
[20:56.06]- 你知道他们的名字吗? - 不知道 那高个是Ted吗?
[20:58.52]No. That's Marshall. He's married to Lily.
[20:58.52]不 那是Marshall 他跟Lily结婚了
[21:00.65]- Okay. You like chicken wings? - Oh,yeah.
[21:00.65]- 好吧 你喜欢吃鸡翅吗? - 喜欢
