The One Where Rachel Finds Out

[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there, Ross is showing pictures of his new baby boy, Ben, to the group.]
Ross: And here's little Ben nodding off...
Monica: Awww, look at Aunt Monica's little boy!
Phoebe: Oh, look, he's got Ross's haircut!
Rachel: Oh, let me see! (grabs picture) Oh, God, is he just the sweetest thing? You must just want to kiss him all over!
(Ross is practically drooling over Rachel at this point.)
Ross: (quietly) That would be nice.
(Chandler, annoyed with Ross's fawning, makes a 'pfft' noise.)
Rachel: Pardon?
Chandler: Nothing, just a little extra air in my mouth. Pffft. Pffffffft. (walks over to where Joey is seated)
(Joey is looking at his check.)
Joey: Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back.
Chandler: Oh, yeah, right, OK... inlcuding the waffles last week, you now owe me... 17 jillion dollars.
Joey: I will, really. I'll pay you back this time.
Chandler: (sigh)... And where's this money coming from? (gives money to Joey)
Joey: Well... I'm helping out down at the N.Y.U. Med School with some... research.
Ross: (overhearing) What kind of research?
Joey: Oh, just, y'know.... science.
Ross: Science. Yeah, I think I've heard of that. (everyone's interest is piqued, they all look over)
Joey: (sigh)... It's a fertility study.
(Rachel laughs.)
Monica: Oh, Joey, please tell me you're only donating your time.
Joey: Alright, come on you guys, it's not that big a deal. Really... I mean, I just go down there every other day and... make my contribution to the project. Hey, hey, but at the end of two weeks, I get seven hundred dollars.
Ross: Hey.
Phoebe: Wow, ooh, you're gonna be making money hand over fist!
Opening Credits
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe are preparing for a barbecue for Rachel's birthday.]
Monica: OK, we got the cole slaw, we got the buns...
Phoebe: We've got the ground-up flesh of formerly cute cows and turkeys, ew... (hands meat to Monica)
(Chandler and Joey enter with charcoal.)
Chandler: (in a deep voice) Men are here.
Joey: We make fire. Cook meat.
Chandler: Then put out fire by peeing, no get invited back.
Monica and Phoebe: Ewww!
Monica: Oh Joey, Melanie called, said she's gonna be late.
Joey: Oh, OK.
Phoebe: So how are things going with you two? Is she becoming your (provocatively) special someone?
Joey: I don't know, she's, uh.... she's pretty great.
Monica: Yeah? What does she think of your little science project?
Joey: What, you think I'm gonna tell a girl I like that I'm also seeing a cup?
Monica: Man's got a point.
Joey: Well, the tough thing is, she really wants to have sex with me.
Chandler: Crazy bitch.
Joey: Yeah, well, I still got a week left to go in the program, and according to the rules, if I want to get the money I'm not allowed to conduct any... ersonal experiments, if you know what I mean.
Monica: Joey... we always know what you mean.
[Time lapse. Chandler and Joey are making the fire, Monica and Phoebe are inside. Ross enters, carrying luggage.]
Phoebe: Hey.
Monica: Hey.
Ross: Hey. (Phoebe sees his bags)
Phoebe: How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Phoebe: Jeez, you say one thing, and...
Monica: You're going to China?
Ross: Yeah, i-it's for the museum. Someone found a bone, we want the bone, but they don't want us to have the bone, so I'm going over there to try to persuade them to give us the bo—it's—it's a whole big bone thing. Anyway, I'm gonna be gone for like, uh... like a week, so, uh, if you wanna reach me, y-you can't. So here's my itinerary (hands a sheet of paper to Monica). Um... here's a picture of me... (hands it to Monica)
Phoebe: Oh, let me see! (takes the picture)
Ross: (to Monica): Could you take it to Carol's every now and then, and show it to Ben, just so he doesn't forget me?
Monica: Yeah.
(Phoebe puts the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Phoebe: Hi, Ben. I'm your father. I am... the head. Aaaaaahhhh.... (puts picture down, sees Ross staring at her) Alright, this barbecue is gonna be very fun.
Ross: Hey, is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left.
Monica: Oh no, she's out having drinks with Carl.
Ross: Oh. (pause) Hey, who's Carl?
Monica: You know, that guy she met at the coffeehouse.
Ross: No.
Phoebe: Oh, well, see, there's this guy she met at the...
Ross: At the coffeehouse, right.
Phoebe: So you do know who he is! (laughs, Ross stares at her) Sorry.
Ross: OK, I'm gonna go say goodbye to the guys.
Phoebe: Oh, hey, y'know what? Tell them that bone story.
(Ross goes outisde on the balcony.)
Ross: Hi.
Joey: Hey!
Chandler: Hey!
Ross: (sigh)....I have to go to China.
Joey: The country?
Ross: No no, this big pile of dishes in my mom's breakfront. Do you guys know who Carl is?
Chandler: Uh, let's see... Alvin... Simon... Theodore.... no.
Ross: Well, Rachel's having drinks with him tonight.
Joey: Oh no! How can she do that when she's never shown any interest in you?!?
Chandler: Forget about her.
Joey: He's right, man. Please. Move on. Go to China. Eat Chinese food.
Chandler: Course there, they just call it food.
Ross: Yeah... I guess. I don't—I don't know. Alright, just... just give her this for me, OK? (gives Chandler a gift for Rachel)
Joey: Listen, buddy, we're just looking out for you.
Ross: I know.
Joey: We want you to be happy. And I may only have a couple beers in me, but... I love you, man. (Joey gives Ross a hug)
Chandler: I'm still on my first. I just think you're nice.
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
Melanie: Anyway, that's when me and my friends started this whole fruit basket business. We call ourselves 'The Three Basketeers.'
Joey: Like the three musketeers, only with fruit.
Chandler: (sarcastic) Ooooh. (looks dumbfounded at Joey's stupidity)
Monica: (gets up) OK, how does everybody like their burgers?
Rachel: Oh, no, no, no. Presents first. Food later. (walks into living room)
(Everyone follows Rachel to the living room. Monica pulls Joey aside.)
Monica: Hey, hold on there, tiger. How's it going? How you holding up?
Joey: Well, not so good. She definitely thinks tonight is the night we're gonna... complete the transaction, if you know what I...
(Monica rolls her eyes.)
Joey: Then you do. Heh, heh.
Monica: So, uh, have you ever thought about being there for her?
Joey: What do you mean?
Monica: Y'know, just be there for her.
(Long pause... Joey looks confused.)
Joey: Not following you.
Monica: Think about it.
(They both walk over to where Rachel is opening her gifts. Rachel sees her first gift is a fruit basket.)
Rachel: OK, I'm guessing this is from...
(Melanie smiles.)
Rachel: Well, thank you, Melanie.
Chandler: (pointing out a gift) OK, this one right here is from me.
Rachel: (picks it up) OK... ah, it's light... (shakes it)...it rattles... it's... (opens it) Travel Scrabble! Oooohhh, thank you! (she gives it back to him)
(Chandler looks dejected. Rachel picks up another gift.)
Rachel: This one's from Joey... feels like a book. Thinks it's a book... feels like a book. And...(opens it)...it's a book!
Phoebe: Oh, it's Dr. Seuss!
Joey: (to Rachel): That book got me through some tough times.
Melanie: There is a little child inside this man!
Chandler: Yes, the doctors say if they remove it, he'll die.
(Rachel picks up the next gift.)
Rachel: Who's this from?
Chandler: Oh, that's Ross's.
Rachel: Oh... (opens it)... (sees it is a pin) Oh my God. He remembered.
Phoebe: Remembered what?
Rachel: It was like months ago. We were walking by this antique store, and I saw this pin in the window, and I told him it was just like one my grandmother had when I was a little girl. Oh! I can't believe he remembered!
Chandler: Well, sure, but can you play it on a plane? (pats his Travel Scrabble game)
Phoebe: Oh, it's so pretty. This must have cost him a fortune.
Monica: I can't believe he did this.
Chandler: Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love with Carol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
Rachel: What did you just say?
Chandler: (panicked) ahem... um... Crystal duck.
Rachel: No, no, no.... the, um, the... 'love' part?
Chandler: (stuttering incoherently) F-hah.... flennin....
Rachel: Oh.... my God.
Chandler: (rubbing his temples) Oh, no-no-no-no-no....
Joey: (pats Chandler on the leg) That's good, just keep rubbing your head. That'll turn back time.
Commercial Break
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Rachel: I mean, this is unbelievable.
Phoebe: I know. This is really, really huge.
Chandler: No it's not. It's small. It's tiny. It's petite. It's wee.
Phoebe: Nuh-uh. I don't think any of our lives are ever gonna be the same ever again.
Chandler: OK, is there a mute button on this woman?
Monica: I think this is so great! I mean, you and Ross! D-did you have any idea?
Rachel: No! None! I mean, my first night in the city, he mentioned something about asking me out, but nothing ever happened, so I just... (to Joey): W-well, what else did he say? I mean, does he, like, want to go out with me?
Joey: Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something.
Rachel: Ross? All this time? Well, I've got to talk to him. (gets up to leave)
Chandler: (quickly) H-He's in China!
Joey: The country.
Monica: No, no, wait. (checks Ross's itinerary) His flight doesn't leave for another forty-five more minutes.
Chandler: What about the time difference?
Monica: From here to the airport?
Chandler: Yes! (Rachel walks towards door) You're never gonna make it!
Monica: Rachel, what're you gonna say to him?
Rachel: I-I-I don't know.
Chandler: Well then maybe you shouldn't go.
Joey: He's right, cause if you're just gonna, like, break his heart, that's the kind of thing that can wait.
Monica: Yeah, but if it's good news, you should tell him now.
Rachel: I don't know. Maybe I'll know when I see him.
Phoebe: Here, look, alright, does this help?
(Phoebe gets up, holds the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Rachel: Noooo... look, all I know is that I cannot wait a week until I see him. I mean, this is just too big. Y'know, I just, I've just gotta talk to him. I... I gotta... OK, I'll see you later. (opens door)
Chandler: Rachel, I love you! Deal with me first! (she leaves)
[Scene: Airport, Ross has headphones on, and is listening to a 'How To Speak Chinese' tape. Occasionally, he makes an outburst in Chinese in accordance with the tape. He is getting on the jetway. The flight attendant is there.]
Ross: (something in Chinese)
Flight Attendant: Alright!
Ross: Ni-chou chi-ma! (walks onto jetway)
(Rachel runs into the airport, trying to catch Ross, moving people out of the way.)
Rachel: Ross! Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me....
(Rachel gets up to the jetway.)
Flight Attendant: Hi!
Rachel: Hi.
Flight Attendant: May I see your boarding pass?
Rachel: Oh, no, no, I don't have one. I just need to talk to my friend.
Flight Attendant: Oh, oooh. I'm sorry. You are not allowed on the jetway unless you have a boarding pass.
Rachel: No, I know, but I—he just went on. He's right there, he's got the blue jacket on, I... can I j-just...
Flight Attendant: No no no! Federal regulations!
Rachel: OK, alright, OK, um... then could you please, uh... just give him a message for me? Please? This is very important.
Flight Attendant: Alright. What's the message?
Rachel: Uh... I don't know.
[Cut to the Jetway, the flight attendant enters, walks past Ross, and approaches an older man with his wife who is also wearing a blue jacket.]
Flight Attendant: Sir? Sir? Excuse me, sir? Uh... I have a message for you.
Man: (confused) What?
Flight Attendant: It's from Rachel. She said that she loved the present, and she will see you when you get back.
Man: (to wife): Toby... Oh, for God's sake, I don't know what she's talking about! There's no Rachel! Don't give me that deep freeze.
[Scene: Joey's Bedroom, he and Melanie are in bed together.]
Melanie: Mmmmmm... Oh, Joey, Joey, Joey... I think I blacked out there for a minute!
Joey: Heh, heh. It was nothin'.
Melanie: Well, now we've gotta find something fun for you! (she starts kissing his chest)
Joey: (panicked) Uhhh.. y'know what? Forget about me. Let's, uh... let's give you another turn.
Melanie: (surprised) M-Me again?
Joey: Sure! Why not?
Melanie: Boy, somebody's gonna get a big fruit basket tomorrow.
(Joey starts to kiss her.)
Melanie: Oooh, I gotta tell you... you are nothing like I thought you would be.
Joey: How do you mean?
Melanie: I don't know, I-I guess I just had you pegged as one of those guys who're always 'me, me, me.' But you... you're a giver. You're like the most generous man I ever met. I mean... you're practically a woman.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Monica is holding the wrapping paper from one of Rachel's gifts.]
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Rachel: I don't know. I don't know... I thought about it all the way there, and I thought about it all the way back... and, uh, oh, you guys, y'know, it's Ross. Y'know what I mean? I mean, it's Ross.
Monica and Phoebe: Sure.
Rachel: I don't know, I mean, this is just my initial gut feeling... but I'm thinking... oh, I'm thinking it'd be really great.
Monica: Oh my God, me too! Oh! Oh, we'd be like friends-in-law! Y'know what the best part is? The best part is that you already know everything about him! I mean, it's like starting on the fifteenth date!
Phoebe: Yeah, but, y'know, it's... it would be like starting on the fifteenth date.
Monica: Another good point.
Phoebe: No, I mean, I mean, when you're at the fifteenth date, y'know, you're already in a very relationshippy place. Y'know, it's... you're committed.
Rachel: (confused) Huh?
Phoebe: Well, I mean, then what happens if it doesn't work out?
Monica: Why isn't it working out?
Rachel: I don't know... sometimes it doesn't.
Monica: Is he not cute enough for you?
Rachel: No!
Monica: Does he not make enough money?
Rachel: No, I'm just....
Phoebe: Maybe there's someone else.
Rachel: Wha...
Monica: Is there? Is there someone else?
Rachel: No! There is.. there is noone else!
Monica: Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?!?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is eating breakfast, Joey quietly opens his bedroom door.]
Chandler: Hey, big...
Joey: Shhhh!
Chandler: (quietly) ...spender.
Joey: She's still asleep.
Chandler: So how'd it go?
Joey: Oh, it was amazing. You know how you always think you're great in bed?
Chandler: The fact that you'd even ask that question shows how little you know me.
Joey: Well, it's like, last night, I couldn't do the thing that usually makes me great. So I had to do all this other stuff. And the response I got... man, oh man, it was like a ticker tape parade!
Chandler: Yes, I know, as it happens my room is very very close to the parade route.
Joey: It was amazing! And not just for her... uh-uh. For me, too. It's like, all of a sudden, I'm blind. But all my other senses are heightened, y'know? It's like... I was able to appreciate it on another level.
Chandler: I didn't know you had another level.
Joey: I know! Neither did I!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, one week later. Monica is seated, Rachel comes out of her bedroom.]
Monica: Hey, great skirt! Birthday present?
Rachel: Yeah.
Monica: Oh, from who?
Rachel: From you. I exchanged the blouse you got me.
Monica: Well, it's the thought. Hey, doesn't Ross's flight get in in a couple hours? At gate 27-B?
Rachel: Uh, yeah. Uh, Monica, y'know, honey, I've been thinking about it and I've decided this—this whole Ross thing, it's just not a good idea.
Monica: Oh, why?
Rachel: Because, I feel like I wouldn't just be going out with him. I would be going out with all of you. Oh, and there would just be all this pressure, and I don't wanna...
Monica: (gets up) No, no, no, no, no, no pressure, no pressure!
Rachel: Monica, nothing has even happened yet, and you're already so...
Monica: I am not 'so'! OK, I was a teensy bit weird at first, but... I'll be good. I promise.
(Door buzzer goes off. Rachel answers it.)
Rachel: Who is it?
Intercom: It's me, Carl.
Rachel: C'mon up.
Monica: Behind my brother's back? (Rachel glares at her) ... is exactly the kind of crazy thing you won't be hearing from me.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is seated, and the apartment is filled with baskets of fruit. Joey enters, check in hand.]
Joey: Seven hundred bucks!
Chandler: Alright, you did it! Do we have any fruit?
Joey: Man, hell of a two weeks, huh? Y'know what, though? I really feel like I learned something.
Chandler: Really? So, you're gonna stick with this 'it's all for her' thing?
Joey: What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? (Joey closes his eyes and walks around with arms spread.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Rachel is having drinks with her date, Carl.]
Carl: I'm just sayin', if I see one more picture of Ed Begley, Jr. in that stupid electric car, I'm gonna shoot myself! I mean, don't get me wrong... I'm not against environmental issues per se.... it's just that guy!
(Rachel looks bored. At this point, Ross—a figment of Rachel's imagination— shows up on the balcony and starts talking to her.)
Ross: I can't believe you'd rather go out with him than me.
Rachel: Would you excuse me, please? I'm trying to have a date here.
Ross: Fine, just stop thinking about me.
(She tries, and Ross disappears momentarily. He reappears, standing closer to her.)
Ross: Can't do it, can you?
Rachel: So I'm thinking about you. So what?
Ross: I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway?
Rachel: Well... he happens to be a very nice... guy....
Carl: I mean, come on, buddy, get a real car!
Ross: Rachel, come on. Give us a chance.
Rachel: Ross, it's too hard.
Ross: No, no, no... why, because it might get weird for everyone else? Who cares about them. This is about us. Look, I-I've been in love with you since, like, the ninth grade.
Rachel: Ross, you're like my best friend.
Ross: I know.
Rachel: If we broke up, and I lost you...
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What makes you think we're gonna break up?
Rachel: Well, have you been involved with someone where you haven't broken up?
Ross: (pause) No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I both know we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are you attracted to me?
Rachel: I don't know... I mean, I've never looked at you that way before.
Ross: Well, start looking.
(They kiss. Ross walks away, and then fades out.)
Rachel: Wow.
Carl: Exactly! And you just know I'm gonna be the guy caught behind this hammerhead in traffic!
Rachel: Right! You're right!
Carl: Heh... y'know?
Rachel: You know what?
Carl: What?
Rachel: I forgot... I am supposed to pick up a friend at the airport. I am so sorry! I'm so... if you want to stay, and finish your drinks, please do.... (gives him her drink) I mean—I'm sorry. I-I-I gotta go. I'm sorry.
(Rachel leaves.)
Carl: But...
[Scene: Airport. Madonna's Take A Bow plays in the background as Rachel waits at the gate with flowers.]
Rachel: (sifting through crowd) Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me, excuse me, sorry. Hi.
[Cut to the jetway, the old man who the flight attendant delivered Rachel's message to gets off the plane, his wife still upset with him.]
Man: For God's sake, will you let it go? There's no Rachel!
(A Chinese woman getting off the plane drops one of her bags. Ross gets off next.)
Ross: Oh, hey, hey, I got that.
(Ross picks up the bag... then he and the woman kiss.)
Julie: Oh, thanks, sweetie.
Ross: No problem. I cannot wait for you to meet my friends.
Julie: Really?
Ross: Yeah.
Julie: You don't think they'll judge and ridicule me?
Ross: No, no, they will. I just... uh...
Ross and Julie: Can't wait.
Ross: Come on, they're gonna love you.
[Cut to a close-up of Rachel, eagerly awaiting Ross's arrival... not knowing he is getting off the plane with another woman.]
End

小彬彬睡着了
看莫妮卡姑姑的小男孩
瞧，他有罗斯的发型
我看看
天啊，真可爱
你一定想吻遍他
那感觉一定很好
怎么了？
没什么
只是嘴里有多余的空气
钱德，愿意帮我吗？
我保证一定会还的
好，包括上星期的威化饼
现在你欠我数不清的钱
这一次我真的会还
你哪儿来的钱？
我正帮纽约大学医学院做一些研究
什么研究？
嗯……科学研究
科学？我想我听说过
生殖研究
乔伊，请告诉我你只贡献时间
拜托，这没什么大不了的
真的，我只是两天去一趟
对这计划作些贡献
但两周后我就有七百元。
你将“靠手”赚钱
我们有酸卷心菜丝，小面包
还有绞牛肉及火鸡肉
男人回来了
我们生火
烧肉
然后撒尿熄火
结果不再被邀请了
真逗
乔伊，玛莲妮来电说她会迟到
好
你们俩进展得如何？
她会成为你的心上人吗？
我不知道，她很好
是吗？
她对你的研究计划有何感想？
你认为我会告诉她
我也和“杯子”约会？
男人考虑得真多
麻烦的是她想和我做爱
这娘儿们疯了
此计划我只剩一星期
根据规定
如果我想拿到钱
我就不能做“个人”实验
如果你们懂我意思的话
乔伊，我们一直都懂你的意思
嗨
嗨
你以为烧烤要多久？
我要去中国了
你说一件事…
你要去中国？
对，为博物馆出差
有人找到骨头
我们要骨头
但他们不想给我们骨头
因此派我去说服他们给我们骨头
都是骨头的事
总之，我要去一个星期
你们将联络不到我
这是我的行程表
这是我的照片
让我看
你能时不时拿照片到卡萝家去给彬看？
这样他就不会忘记我了
彬，我是你爸爸
我是头
这回烧烤一定很好玩
瑞秋在吗？
我想在我离开前祝她生日快乐
她和卡尔在外面喝酒
卡尔是谁？
她在咖啡屋认识的那个
不认识
这个人是她…在咖啡屋认识的
这么说你知道他是谁
我去跟他们道别
告诉他们骨头的事吧
我得到中国(磁器)一趟
国家？
不，我妈家中的一大堆盘子
你知道卡尔是谁吗？
我想想看
艾文，赛门，希尔朵…不认识
瑞秋今晚和他在一起喝酒
不，她还没对你有任何表示前
怎能这样做？
忘了她吧
他说得对，伙计
去吧，到中国，吃中国菜
当然，他们在那儿只称为菜
是吗？大概吧，我也不知道
帮我把这个交给她，好吗？
兄弟，我们只是为你着想
我们要你快乐
或许我喝了两瓶
但我爱你
我只喝了一瓶
我觉得你人真好
总之，我和朋友开始水果篮事业后
我们就自称为”三篮人”
就像“三剑客”，只是多了水果
好吧，谁想吃汉堡？
不，先拆礼物，待会儿再吃东西
等等，猛男
进展得如何？
不太顺利
她想在今晚就“敲定这笔交易”
如果你…你懂
曾想过要为她着想？
什么意思？
只为她着想
不懂
好好想一想
我猜这是…谢谢，玛莲妮
这是我送你的
好轻，还有声音
是……旅游拼字
谢谢
这是乔伊送的
感觉像是一本书
我猜是一本书
感觉像是一本书
就是一本书
是《苏博士》
那本书让我度过许多难关
这男人里面有个小孩
医生说把他移走他就会死
这是谁送的？
罗斯送的
天啊，他记得
记得什么？
几个月前我们经过一家古董店
在橱窗看见这个胸针时
我告诉他我小时候我祖母也有一个
没想到他还记得
虽然如此，但你能在飞机上玩吗？
好漂亮
真漂亮
一定花了他不少钱
没想到他会这么做
拜托，罗斯？
记得大学的时候他和卡萝谈恋爱时
他送给她一只贵死人的水晶鸭
你刚才说什么？
水晶鸭
不……“恋爱”那一部份
谈…谈……
天啊
糟了……
很好，继续挠你的头
时间会倒流的
太不可思议了
真是太不可思议了
我知道，这真是太大了
不，它又小又细又霉
我认为我们的生活将产生变化
这女人身上有静音按钮吗？
我认为这样很好啊
你和罗斯
你有感觉吗？
没有
我来到纽约的第一夜
他曾提过要约我出去
但他后来再没提过邀我出去
所以我……
他还说些什么？
他想约我出去？
如果他爱你爱得无法自拔
他大概想和你
喝杯咖啡什么的
罗斯？这些日子以来？
我得找他谈谈
可他现在中国
那个国家
等等，他的飞机再过45分钟才会起飞
时差呢？
从这儿到机场？
对
你赶不上的
我得试试
瑞秋，你要对他说什么？
我也不知道
那么或许你不该去
没错，因为你是去伤他的心
不妨再等等
对，但如果是好消息
你得立刻去
我也不知道
或许见到面时我就知道
这个有帮助吗？
没用
我只知道我等不了一星期
这件事太严重了
我得和他谈谈，再见了
瑞秋，我爱你
先跟我把事情解决
你笑什么？
罗斯，抱歉
请出示登机证
我没有,我只是想找我朋友
抱歉，除非有登机证
否则不能进人
我知道，他刚走
他就在那儿，穿蓝色夹克
我能…
不行……联邦法规
好吧，能请你帮我传话给他？
这件事非常重要
好吧，请说
我也不知道
抱歉，先生
有人叫我传话给你
什么?
是瑞秋
她说她喜欢你送的礼物
你回来后她想见你
什么？
桃碧，拜托，
我不知道她在说什么
我不认识瑞秋
别给我脸色看
呣……乔伊……
我想我爽昏了
这不算什么
现在让我来伺候你
别管我了
我再伺候你一回
又是我？
当然，有何不可？
明天有人会收到大水果篮
我得告诉你
你不像我想像中的那样
什么意思？
说不上来
大概是我认为
你是只顾自己享受的人
但你是个乐于付出的人
你是我见过最慷慨的人
你简直就是个女人
瑞秋，这包装纸要留下来吗？
只破了一点点
你要为罗斯留下
还是要我丢掉？
我不知道
我左思右想
罗斯，就是罗斯了
当然
这是我内心深处的感受
我想这样应该会很不错
天啊，我也是这样想
这样我们就成了亲戚兼朋友
你知道最棒的是什么？
最棒的就是你已对他了如指掌
就好像从第15次约会开始
对，但这就像
从第15次约会开始
这观点也不错
不，在第15次约会时
感情已相当深厚
你们已经定下来了
如果感情破裂该怎么办？
为何会感情破裂？
不知道，感情是勉强不来的
你不觉得他帅？
什么？
他钱赚得不够多？
不,我只是
或许是另有其人？
有吗？还有另外的男人？
没有，没有另有其人
那么你为何甩掉我哥？
什么?
大…挥霍者
她还在睡觉
情况如何？
简直是太神奇了
你有没有老觉得自己床上功夫不错？
你会问这种问题
表示你根本不了解我
昨晚我不能做让自己满足的事
因此我得搬出全套功夫
结果我得到什么回应？
我的天啊
就像是盛大的游行
我知道
游行发生时
我的房间就非常接近游行路线
这简直是太神奇了
而且不只是对她
对我也一样
我就好像突然失明
但其他的感官却更加的敏感
好像我达到更高的境界
我不知道你还有更高的境界
我懂，我自己也不知道
漂亮的裙子，生日礼物？
对
谁送的？
你
我把你送的衬衫拿去换的
真聪明
罗斯的飞机不是再过几小时就要抵达了？
27-B出口？
对
我一直在想
我虽决定和罗斯在一起
但这样或许不好
为什么？
因为我感觉
我不只是和他出去
而是和你们大家一起出去
因为压力…
不
……没有压力…
八字都还没一撇你就…
我没有
开始我也觉得有点奇怪
但我没事的，我保证
谁啊？
是我，卡尔
上来！
背着我哥？
我就不做出这种疯狂事
-七百块！
-好样的，你办到了！
我们有水果可以吃吗？
折腾了两星期
但我感觉自己学到了一些
真的？
这么说你将继续“牺牲自己成全她人”？
你疯了不成
瞎子重见光明后会这样走路吗？
我是说如果我再看见
艾德贝格拉二世在那电车上
我就举枪自尽
别误会我的意思
我个人并不反对环保
只是我讨厌那家伙
我难以相信你跟他约会
而不是跟我
抱歉，我正在约会
行，那就别再想我
办不到，对不？
我在想你，那又怎样？
我不懂你为何会选上这种人？
他像是个好男人
老兄，买台真正的车吧
瑞秋，给我一个机会吧
罗斯，太难了
为什么？因为大家会感觉不对劲？
谁理他们啊
这是我们两人的事
我从九年级开始就爱上你
罗斯，你像是我最要好的朋友
我知道如果分手我将失去你
不，你为何认为我们会分手？
曾和你在一起的人不是都和你分手了
是
但这种事只会发生一次
你我都知道我们是天生的一对，对不？
关键是
你对我有感觉吗？
我不知道
我从未以那种方式看你
那就开始看吧
没错，我就是被困在车阵中的那一个
对……
你知道吗？
什么
我忘了我应该去机场接朋友
真是抱歉
如果你想在这儿继续喝，请便
但我得走了,抱歉
可是
让一让……让一让……
桃碧，别再胡思乱想了
没有瑞秋这个人
嘿，你掉了东西
谢谢,甜心
不客气
我迫不及待想把你介绍给我朋友们
真的？
对
你不认为他们会对我评头论足、取笑我？
他们会的
但我实在是等不及
别担心，他们一定会喜欢你的