[00:00.16]******g is not technically yogurt, 知道了吧 你吃的这个 不算是真的酸奶酪

[00:02.28]because it doesn't have enough live acidophilus cultures. 因为里面没有足够的 活的嗜酸培养菌

[00:04.92]It's really just ice milk with carrageenan added for thickness. 只不过是冰牛奶里加了点 角叉胶 增加粘稠度

[00:08.43]Oh,that's very interesting. 喔 真有意思哈

[00:10.54]It's also not pink and has no berries. 它也不真是粉红色 也没有天然浆果粒

[00:14.52]Yeah,but it doesn't really answer my question. 嗯 可这也没有回答我的问题呐

[00:17.02]What was your question again? 你问的啥问题?

[00:18.56]Do you want some? 你要来点儿不?

[00:21.75]Right. No. 对对 不用了

[00:22.71]- I'm lactose intolerant. - Right. - 我受不了乳糖的 - 对哦

[00:24.07]- So,gas. - Yeah,got it. - 吃了会放屁的 - 好吧 明白了

[00:27.22]Well... good night. 那么... 晚安了

[00:44.27]What are you doing? 你这是做什么呢?

[00:45.55]Oh,there's a draft. 哦 那边有阵风

[00:48.22]I didn't feel a draft. 我没觉得有风啊

[00:50.63]Why don't we just go into,uh,your... 那我们还是去... 你的...

[00:53.78]Yeah,you know what,maybe we should slow things down a little. 我说 也许我们不该那么着急

[00:56.68]No,no,I didn't mean to go into your apartment to go fast. 不 我不是说要去你公寓 去急着干嘛干嘛

[00:59.53]No,I know. 当然了 我知道

[01:01.55]I know what you meant,it's just... this is only our first date. 我知道你不是那意思 只是... 这才是咱俩第一次约会

[01:04.45]Yeah,okay,sure,no problem. 嗯 好啊 没问题

[01:05.85]Why don't we just figure out where we're going and when we want to get there, 那我们就先想想 下次要去哪儿 准备啥时候到那儿

[01:10.72]and then rate of speed equals distance over time. 这样距离除以时间 就知道速度了呗

[01:16.52]Solve for R. 问题解决

[01:19.53]Or we could just wing it. 我们也可以到时候再想嘛

[01:22.09]That might work,too. 那没准也行

[01:24.74]- Good night,Leonard. - Good night. - 晚安 Leonard - 晚安

[01:31.77]He's coming-- screensaver! 他来了 快上屏保!

[01:38.39]Oh,hey,Leonard. How was your date? 嘿 Leonard 约会怎么样哇?

[01:42.23]Bite me. 要你管

[01:45.34]Sheldon,how could you just sit there and let them spy on me? Sheldon 你怎么能傻坐着 眼睁睁看他们监视我呢?

[01:48.88]They were clever,Leonard. 他们油菜啊 Leonard

[01:49.89]They exploited my complete lack of interest in what you were doing. 他们完全明白 我对你那些破事儿 一点兴趣没有

[01:54.72]You should thank us. 你还该谢谢我们呢

[01:56.08]When future generations try to determine why your relationship with Penny crashed and burned, 要是后来人想弄明白 你和Penny的恋情为啥会土崩瓦解

[02:00.81]this right here is the black box. 这玩意儿就是黑匣子呐!

[02:04.12]What are you talking about? The date went fine. 你胡说什么 约会挺好的

[02:06.76]Dude,she said she wants to slow things down. 拜托 她都说了 想要慢慢来

[02:08.77]Okay,so she said she wants to slow things down. 好吧 她是说了 想要慢慢来

[02:11.89]It's like saying,"I'm really enjoying this meal. 意思差不多就是 "今天的晚餐我非常喜欢

[02:15.86]I'm going to slow down and savor it." 我得慢慢来 好好回味一下"

[02:18.24]No,it's like,"This fish tastes bad, 才怪 她的意思是 "这鱼真难吃死了

[02:21.61]so I'm gonna slow down and spit it out." 我得慢慢来 吐光了它"

[02:27.66]- You being the fish. - I'm not the fish. - 这臭鱼说的就是你! - 我才不是这臭鱼呢

[02:30.02]Oh,really? Did you make a second date? 真的? 你俩定了下一次约会吗?

[02:32.26]Well,no,we sort of decided to wing it. 这倒没有... 我们说好了 到时候再想

[02:34.16]Oh,even I know that's lame. 得了吧 连我都觉得这太逊了

[02:37.82]Okay,all right,let's assume your hypothesis. 行啊 咱就说说你的假设

[02:40.50]We went to dinner,we talked,we laughed,we kissed. 我们一起去吃饭 有说有笑 有吻有抱

[02:43.97]Where could I have possibly gone wrong? 这还能错到哪儿去啊?

[02:45.83]Think back,Leonard. 你好好想想 Leonard

[02:47.02]The littlest things can set women off. 再小的事情都能让女人爆发

[02:49.15]Like,"Hey,the waitress is hot,I bet we could get her to come home with us." 比方说 "嘿 这服务生真辣 我打赌 肯定能让她跟咱回家"

[02:54.03]Or,"How much does your mom weigh? 或者 "你妈妈有多重呐?

[02:55.86]I want to know what I'm getting into." 我想知道我搭上的是啥样的妞儿"

[02:58.24]I didn't say anything like that. 这种话我才不会说

[02:59.66]Good,'cause they don't work. 很好 因为这么说不管用

[03:02.55]They also don't care for it if you stare at them and hyperventilate. 她们也不关心 你是不是盯着她们 呼吸加速

[03:05.27]Sadly,that's my home run swing. 挺惨的 在我们家 这就像是家族传统

[03:08.34]Look,everything went fine. 我说 一切都挺好的

[03:10.66]I didn't even have to refer to my impromptu conversation starters. 连事先准备的一些开场白都没用到呢

[03:14.95]That woman across the hall is into me. 走廊对面那个女孩 就是喜欢我嘛

[03:17.80]Let's go to the tape. 咱还是看带子吧

[03:21.35]Look at her reaction to the good night kiss. 你瞧她临别一吻的时候 那反应

[03:23.72]No change in respiration,pupils un-dilated,no flushing of the chest. 呼吸平稳 瞳孔没有放大 胸口也没啥起伏

[03:28.24]Nice close-up,by the way. 这特写镜头拍的真赞

[03:30.62]Interesting. Her jaws are clenched: no tongue access. 有意思嘿 她的下巴很紧 也没有用舌头

[03:33.82]Clearly a bad sign amongst mating humans. 对于寻偶期的人类来说 这可不是啥好消息

[03:37.62]That's not a bad sign. 这怎么就不是好消息了

[03:39.26]Please,you might as well have been two iguana with no dewlap enlargement. 得了吧 还不如说你们是两只鬣蜥 只是喉部没有垂肉罢了

[03:44.02]And the worst sign of all is you're here and not there. 最糟的就是 这会儿你不在她家 而在这里!

[03:46.80]I'm not there because I'm taking things slow,which, 我不在她家 因为我也决定慢慢来 这个...

[03:50.95]by the way,compared to you guys,approaches warp speed. 跟你们比起来 都快接近星际速度了

[03:55.36]And take down that camera. 快把摄像头给我撤了

[03:59.68]He was a lot more fun when he had no hope. 他心里没牵没挂的时候 真有意思多了

[04:05.34]Give him time. 给他点时间吧

[04:40.21]Oh,hi,Penny.

[04:41.49]FYI,the hot water is inadequate on machine two,so colors only, 你好啊 Penny

[04:43.49]顺便说句 2号机器的热水不足 别深色浅色混着洗

[04:45.56]and four is still releasing the fabric softener too early in the cycle,

[04:48.49]so I'd avoid using that for your delicates. 4号机器呢 洗衣程序中 还是会提前放出织物柔顺剂

[04:50.24]Thanks. 所以你那些精致的衣服 还是别用那台了

[04:52.24]谢了

[04:54.93]Oh,good Lord...

[04:56.21]why don't you just take your clothes down to the river and beat them with a rock? 老天爷啊...

[04:58.21]你还不如把衣服拿到河边 搁在石头上猛捶一阵

[05:04.66]Sheldon,can I ask you a question?

[05:07.75]I would prefer that you not,but I won't go so far as to forbid it. Sheldon 我问你个问题行不?

[05:09.75]我当然最好你别问 不过也不会阻止你

[05:12.22]All right,I heard yes,so...

[05:15.28]Okay,here's my question. 那... 我就当你同意了...

[05:17.08]Has Leonard ever dated, you know,a regular girl? 我想问问你

[05:19.08]Leonard以前有没有 跟正常的女孩子约会过?

[05:22.96]Well,I assume you're not referring to digestive regularity.

[05:24.96]我想你指的 应该不是消化功能正常吧

[05:27.55]Because I've come to learn that such inquiries are inappropriate.

[05:29.55]要是那样的话 我想这问题问的不合适

[05:31.74]No,I meant,has he ever been involved with someone who wasn't a brainiac?

[05:33.74]我是说 他有没有跟 没那么大学问的女孩子谈过?

[05:36.78]Well,a few years ago,he did go out with a woman who had a PhD in French literature.

[05:38.78]话说几年前 他确实跟一个 学法国文学的女博士有过一段儿

[05:44.09]How is that not a brainiac?

[05:46.19]Well,for one thing,she was French. 这还不算有大学问?

[05:48.19]理由一 她是法国人

[05:50.74]For another,it was literature.

[05:52.74]理由二 她读的是文学

[05:59.37]So...

[06:02.23]do you think that if Leonard and I keep dating,he'll eventually get bored with me? 那你觉得...

[06:04.23]如果我和Leonard继续好下去 他会不会有一天觉得我很没劲啊?

[06:12.98]- That depends. - On what?

[06:15.51]- Do you have a working knowledge of quantum physics? - No. - 那得看情况 - 什么情况?

[06:17.51]- 你懂量子物理吗? - 不懂

[06:19.63]- Do you speak Klingon? - No.

[06:21.63]- 你会说克林贡语吗?(星际迷航) - 不会

[06:23.59]- You know any card tricks? - Okay,you know what...

[06:25.59]- 你会耍牌吗? - 行了 我说...

[06:28.46]I get it.

[06:29.36]Leonard has no business being involved with a waitress-slash-actress 我明白了

[06:32.85]who felt so insecure that she lied to him about finishing community college. Leonard和一个服务员兼二流演员 没有共同语言

[06:34.85]而且她还骗他说 上完了社区大学 心里正发慌呢

[06:37.50]Why would you lie about that?

[06:39.08]Well,he was going on and on about this college and that grad school,and I... 你为什么撒谎?

[06:42.22]I didn't want him to think I was some kind of stupid loser. 他总是在说这大学怎样 那个研究生院怎么样 我就...

[06:44.22]我不想让他觉得我很傻很衰嘛

[06:45.75]You thought the opposite of "stupid loser" was "community college graduate"?

[06:47.75]你觉得"很傻很衰"的反义词 是"社区大学毕业生"?

[06:54.78]You know,there are a lot of successful people in this country who are community college graduates.

[06:56.78]很多成功人士 都是从社区大学毕业的

[06:59.49]Yeah,but you are neither.

[07:01.49]没错 可你哪个都挨不上边

[07:03.63]Right. Okay,look,this is between you and me.

[07:06.04]You cannot tell Leonard any of this. 对 好吧 你得替我保密

[07:08.04]啥也不要告诉Leonard

[07:10.30]- You're asking me to keep a secret? - Yeah.

[07:13.30]Well,I'm sorry,but you would have had to express that desire before revealing the secret, - 你要我保守秘密? - 是的

[07:15.30]那真对不起了 你应该在说出秘密前 表达出要我保密的意思

[07:17.94]so that I could choose whether or not I wanted to accept the covenant of secret keeping.

[07:19.94]我好选择 到底要不要替你保密

[07:22.72]You can't impose a secret on an ex post facto basis.

[07:24.72]你事后再说 这怎么行呢

[07:27.54]What?

[07:29.26]Secret keeping is a complicated endeavor. 什么?

[07:31.68]One has to be concerned not only about what one says, 保守秘密是一项艰巨复杂的任务

[07:34.14]but about facial expressions, autonomic reflexes. 不但要注意说的话

[07:37.32]When I try to deceive,I myself have more nervous tics than a Lyme disease research facility. 还得注意面部表情 习惯性反应

[07:39.32]我说谎的时候 因为紧张产生的扁虱(tick) 比莱姆关节炎研究设备产生的还多

[07:48.82]It's a joke.

[07:50.25]It relies on the homonymic relationship between "tick," 这是笑话啊

[07:52.49]the bloodsucking arachnid,and "tic," the involuntary muscular contraction. 同音词嘛 "tick"是指

[07:54.49]吸血蜘蛛 而"tic"是无意识的肌肉痉挛

[08:01.06]I made it up myself.

[08:03.06]我自己编的

[08:05.09]Okay,look,if Leonard finds out that I lied,I will absolutely die of embarrassment.

[08:07.09]听着 如果Leonard发现我说谎 我一定羞愧自尽了

[08:10.31]Physiologically impossible.

[08:11.52]Oh,Sheldon,please. 生理学上讲是不可能的

[08:13.37]Look,I am asking you as a friend. 哦 Sheldon 拜托

[08:16.76]So you're saying that friendship contains within it an inherent obligation to maintain confidences? 我是以朋友的名义请求你

[08:18.76]照你这么说 朋友就要无条件的保守秘密?

[08:21.83]Well,yeah.

[08:23.52]Interesting. 是啊

[08:25.89]One more question,and perhaps I should have led with this. 有意思

[08:28.69]When did we become friends? 再一个问题 或许应该这样问

[08:30.69]我们什么时候成朋友了?

[08:33.15]i.e.,I couldn't become Green Lantern unless I was chosen by the Guardians of Oa,

[08:35.15]也就是说 要不被总部守护先知选中 我就成不了绿灯侠 (漫画形象)

[08:37.31]but given enough start-up capital and an adequate research facility,I could be Batman.

[08:39.31]但如果给我足够的启动资金和 足够的科研设备 我就能成为蝙蝠侠

[08:46.32]- You could be Batman? - Sure. I'm Batman. See?

[08:48.32]- 你能成为蝙蝠侠? - 当然 我就是蝙蝠侠 看见没?

[08:53.12]- Hi,guys. - Hi,Penny.

[08:55.12]- 嗨 伙计们 - 嗨 Penny

[08:56.87]Penny,if you're not doing anything Friday night,I thought maybe we could go see a movie.

[08:58.87]Penny 你周五晚上有空的话 我们去看电影吧

[09:00.58]Oh,um,you know,I think I have the dinner shift on Friday.

[09:03.56]Okay,what about Saturday? 呃 我周五晚上要轮班

[09:05.20]You know,I'm not sure; the manager hasn't posted the schedule yet. 好吧 周六呢?

[09:08.35]- How about I let you know? - Great. 说不准 经理还没公布排班表呢

[09:10.48]So you just let me know when you know. Okay,so... - 出来了 我再告诉你? - 很好

[09:13.46]Oh,God,I am the bad fish. 那你知道了就告诉我 好的 那...

[09:15.46]天呐 我就是那条臭鱼

[09:17.97]What did I do wrong?

[09:19.72]Why are you asking me? 我哪做错了?

[09:21.86]I have no information about your interactions with Penny other than what you have provided me, 你为什么问我?

[09:25.20]nor do I have any method of learning such things. 你和Penny的事儿 除了你已经告诉我的 我啥也不知道

[09:27.20]我也没有本事学到

[09:30.61]- What does that mean? - Nothing.

[09:32.70]You seem to be implying an informational back-channel - 这话什么意思? - 没什么

[09:35.11]between me and Penny where obviously none exists. 你说的倒像是 我和Penny背地里通了气

[09:37.43]No,I didn't. 很明显 这是没有的事

[09:38.47]I just think you need to be careful how you phrase things,sir. 没 我没觉得

[09:40.47]我想你要注意你的表达了 先生

[09:44.44]What's going on with you?

[09:46.17]I might ask you the same question. 你怎么回事?

[09:48.09]Why do you insist on attempting to drag me into matters which have nothing to do with me, 这问题我也得问问你吧

[09:50.09]那些跟我无关的事儿 你何必非要把我扯进去?

[09:52.02]but exist between you and Penny, a person to whom I barely speak?

[09:54.02]都是你和Penny之间的事 我跟她连话都不怎么说的

[10:03.78]What's wrong with your face?

[10:06.49]There's no reason to bring my looks into this. 你脸怎么了?

[10:08.49]我脸这样 没啥原因

[10:10.83]- Good day,Leonard. - What

[10:13.27]I said,"Good day." - 祝你今天过的愉快 Leonard - 什么?

[10:15.27]我说 "祝你今天过的愉快"

[10:18.42]Good day?

[10:20.42]过的愉快?

[10:22.03]Also today,we have a fresh-caught Alaska salmon,

[10:24.44]and that's served with a teriyaki glaze and sticky rice. 今天还为您供应 新鲜的阿拉斯加大马哈鱼

[10:27.05]Our soup of the day is... 配上烧汁和糯米饭

[10:27.82]You must release me from my oath. 今天的汤是...

[10:29.59]你必须将我从我的誓言中解放出来

[10:33.11]Sheldon,I'm working.

[10:35.50]Why don't you take a minute to decide? Sheldon 我在工作

[10:37.27]你们花几分钟决定一下吧

[10:39.75]I can't keep your secret,Penny.

[10:41.35]I'm going to fold like an energy-based de novo protein in conformational space. 我不能保守你的秘密了 Penny

[10:43.12]我就像构象空间里 基于能量的内源蛋白 要折叠起来了 (fold 也有失败的意思)

[10:46.97]Like a Renaissance tryptich.

[10:49.12]Like a cheap suit. 就像是文艺复兴时期的三联画 (教堂祭坛上的饰物 两翼可向内折叠)

[10:51.49]Look,why is it so hard for you to keep one little secret? 还有廉价的西装

[10:54.29]I'm constitutionally incapable. 你保守个小秘密 咋就这么难呢?

[10:56.37]That's why I was refused clearance for a very prestigious government research fellowship 我天生就保守不住!

[10:58.14]所以我上次申请那项高端政府研究奖学金 证明开不出来

[11:00.25]at a secret military supercollider located beneath a fake agricultural station

[11:02.02]项目里的超级对撞机 位于密歇根州 Traverse城东南12.5英里的

[11:03.62]12.5 miles southeast of Traverse City,Michigan.

[11:05.39]一个空设的农学院地下

[11:11.85]Which you did not hear about from me.

[11:13.62]我没告诉过你啊

[11:15.49]Look,just forget I told you about me...

[11:18.57]not graduating from community college,okay? 你就别老记着我说过...

[11:20.86]Forget? You want me to forget? 社区大学没毕业 好吗?

[11:22.46]This mind does not forget. 别老记着? 这能忘得掉吗?

[11:24.94]I haven't forgotten a single thing since the day my mother stopped breastfeeding me. 我这脑子 啥东西忘得掉啊!

[11:26.71]从我妈给我断奶后 我就没忘掉过一件事

[11:30.08]- It was a drizzly Tuesday. - Okay...

[11:33.10]Look,you promised me you would keep my secret, - 那天是周二 下着毛毛雨 - 好了...

[11:35.22]so you're just gonna have to figure out a way to do it. 你答应过我要保守秘密

[11:36.99]那你就想个办法别漏嘴

[11:39.12]Leonard,I'm moving out.

[11:40.89]Leonard 我要搬出去

[11:42.55]What do you mean you're moving out? Why?

[11:44.81]There doesn't have to be a reason. 什么叫"要搬出去"? 为什么?

[11:48.74]Yeah,there kinda does. 不一定非要有理由嘛

[11:50.59]Not necessarily. 是啊 总该有吧

[11:51.83]This is a classic example of Munchausen's Trilemma.

[11:54.71]Either the reason is predicated on a series of sub-reasons leading to an infinite regression, 不一定非得有

[11:54.80]这是Munchausen三难推理的典型例子

[11:58.93]or it tracks back to arbitrary axiomatic statements, 要么就是 这个前提通过一系列 不断弱化的次前提 已经得到阐述

[12:01.30]or it's ultimately circular, 要么就是 能从所谓偶然的公理陈述中 找到答案

[12:02.74]i.e.I'm moving out because I'm moving out.

[12:04.27]也有可能是终极循环

[12:05.71]也就是说 因为我要搬出去 所以我要搬出去

[12:07.99]I'm still confused.

[12:09.31]Leonard,I don't see how I could have made it any simpler.

[12:10.96]我还是不懂

[12:13.45]Hey,qu'est que s'up? Leonard 我已经说得够明白的了

[12:16.76]We just got back from that exhibit of those plasticized human cadavers. 嘿 伙计们 还好吗? (蹩脚法语)

[12:19.87]And some of those skinless chicks were Hot! 我们刚去看了塑化人体标本展

[12:22.84]那些个没皮的小妞儿 真是辣哟!

[12:24.48]If you'll excuse me,I'm going to pack.

[12:28.27]That's kind of an overreaction to a little harmless necrophilia. 抱歉 我得去收拾了

[12:31.24]他对我单纯的恋尸癖 反应还真大

[12:33.99]It's not you,Howard. He says he's moving out.

[12:37.39]What did you do? Howard 不关你事 他说他要搬出去

[12:39.28]Did you change the contrast or brightness settings on the television? 你对他干了啥?

[12:42.92]No. 你改了电视机的对比度和亮度?

[12:43.52]Did you take a Band-Aid off in front of him?

[12:46.60]No. 没啊

[12:47.22]Did you buy generic ketchup, forget to rinse the sink, 你在他面前扒了创可贴?

[12:49.74]talk to him through the bathroom door? 没

[12:50.19]你买了三无番茄酱? 忘了洗水池?

[12:53.25]Adjust the thermostat,cook with cilantro,pronounce the "t" in often? 还是隔着厕所门同他讲话?

[12:56.22]调了恒温器? 煮菜放了芫荽叶? "t"那音总是忘了发?

[12:58.76]No.

[13:00.90]Did you make fun of trains? 没有

[13:05.33]No,I didn't do anything. He's just gone insane. 你是不是拿火车开玩笑了?

[13:08.41]Well,we all knew this day was coming. 没有 我啥都没干 他疯了

[13:12.87]Well,that was fast. 也是 这天迟早会来的

[13:14.77]It's my pre-packed disaster evacuation bag. 你动作还真快

[13:18.70]It's recommended by the Department of Homeland Security. 这是我早准备好的避难行囊

[13:22.02]And Sarah Connor. 国土安全部推荐的

[13:25.11]Where are you going to live? 还有Sarah Connor ("终结者"女主人公)

[13:26.85]Until I find a permanent place,I will stay with friends. 你打算住哪儿?

[13:30.04]Bye. 在我找到寓所之前 我先在朋友家挤挤

[13:34.40]Well... you can't stay with me. 回见

[13:36.23]I have a teeny-tiny apartment. 呃... 你不能住我那儿

[13:38.13]Excuse me,but isn't hosting guests an aspect of "manushya yajna," 我的公寓小得可怜

[13:42.50]one of the five central religious duties or sacrifices of the Hindu householder? 广纳宾客不正是"向人致敬"的一部分吗?

[13:45.47]"向人致敬"不是印度五大宗教戒规之一吗?

[13:50.57]I hate trains.

[13:53.54]我讨厌火车

[13:58.28]Don't be ridiculous,you love trains.

[14:02.17]Yes,I do. Come on. 别开玩笑了 你可喜欢火车了

[14:06.53]See you later,Leonard. 啊 没错 来吧

[14:09.50]回见 Leonard

[14:14.65]This could work.

[14:17.62]还真管用

[14:26.23]This is a very old building.

[14:28.36]60 years. It used to be a watch factory. 这栋楼有年头了

[14:32.20]What? 造了六十年了 以前是手表厂

[14:33.25]Don't you worry about the residual radium from the luminous dials?

[14:35.17]怎么了?

[14:37.61]Not until now! 你不担心残留在发光表盘里的镭吗?

[14:40.63]I can't believe I didn't bring my Geiger counter. 你干嘛要提!

[14:44.22]I had it on my bed and I didn't pack it. 我竟然没带盖格计数器 (用于测量放射性物质)

[14:47.40]Well,if you're not comfortable staying here,Sheldon... 就在床头 我居然没拿

[14:48.99]I'm kidding,I packed it. 那么... Sheldon 要是你觉得住着不舒服

[14:52.04]It was a joke. 我开玩笑的 我带来了

[14:53.16]I was subverting the conversational expectations.

[14:56.11]I believe they call that the,uh,ol' switcharoo. 是个笑话

[14:56.13]我就是要破坏你的语境期待

[14:59.08]那叫啥来着 "出其不意" (语言的突然变化 以求意想不到的效果)

[15:01.07]Terrific.

[15:04.04]好极了

[15:06.40]Is that woman Aishwarya Rai?

[15:08.38]Yes,isn't she an amazing actress? 那女的是Aishwarya Rai吗? (印度当红影星)

[15:10.16]Actually,I'd say she's a poor man's Madhuri Dixit. 是的 她是个很棒的演员吧

[15:13.77]How dare you! 我倒觉得她是可怜虫心中的Madhuri Dixit (印度90年代知名影星 后结婚生子)

[15:16.02]Aishwarya Rai is a goddess. 你敢再说一遍!

[15:18.19]By comparison,Madhuri Dixit is a leprous prostitute. Aishwarya Rai是我的女神

[15:21.16]相比之下 Madhuri Dixit 就是得麻风病的妓女

[15:24.13]Sorry,I didn't mean to offend you.

[15:28.19]Obviously,you're not that familiar with Indian cinema. 对不起 我没想到会冒犯你

[15:31.16]显然你不了解印度电影

[15:39.92]Who is it?

[15:41.18]Stripper-Gram!

[15:42.89]谁啊?

[15:44.15]脱衣舞娘来喽!

[15:47.03]Tag,you're It.

[15:50.36]Shouldn't you put him in a brown paper bag and set him on fire? 交给你了

[15:53.33]你就不能把他塞进牛皮纸袋里 烧了算了?

[15:57.00]I've never slept on an air mattress before.

[16:00.71]No lumbar support whatsoever. 我从来没睡过气垫床

[16:04.08]Maybe you'd be happier on a park bench. 腰部都没东西撑着

[16:07.05]你大概是想睡公园的长椅上是吧

[16:08.57]I don't see any way to get a park bench in here.

[16:12.22]Do you want to switch? 我认为 你没有办法把长椅弄到这儿来

[16:13.46]No,that's fine.

[16:14.82]I'm perfectly comfortable sleeping on a bouncy castle. 要换一下吗?

[16:16.43]不用了 这样挺好

[16:17.79]睡在充气城堡上可舒服呢

[16:20.64]Get out of bed. We're switching.

[16:21.90]- Now,only if you want to. - Just get in the bed!

[16:23.61]下床来 我和你换

[16:25.49]What's going on? - 我没逼着你换 - 快下床!

[16:27.35]Are you boys roughhousing? 这是怎么了?

[16:31.43]We're just talking,Ma! 你们两个臭小子 闹什么闹?

[16:33.61]If you don't settle down right now, 老妈 我们只是在聊天!

[16:36.16]I'm not going to let you have any more sleepovers! 要是你们再不给我安生点

[16:39.13]看我以后还让不让你去朋友家过夜!

[16:41.16]For God's sake,Ma,I'm 27 years old!

[16:45.00]And it's not even a school night! 老天啊 老妈 我都27了!

[16:47.97]明天又不上学!

[16:51.88]Comfy now?

[16:54.85]舒服了吧?

[16:59.30]That poster of Halle Berry is a little unnerving.

[17:03.63]So don't look at it. 那张Halle Barry的海报让我有点紧张 (好莱坞女星 曾出演猫女)

[17:05.73]She's like my fourth favorite Catwoman. 别看就是了

[17:07.83]No kidding. 她是我第四爱的猫女郎

[17:08.67]Yeah,Julie Newmar,Michelle Pfieffer,Eartha Kitt,and then her.

[17:10.80]不是吧

[17:12.39]What about Lee Merriweather? 对 前三个是Julie Newmar Michelle Pfieffer 和Eartha Kitt

[17:14.11]Oh,I forgot about Lee Merriweather. Lee Merriweather呢?

[17:16.96]Well,I'm glad that's settled. 噢 我把她忘了

[17:19.79]That makes Halle Berry my fifth favorite Catwoman. 好吧 终于搞定了

[17:22.93]It's Julie Newmar,Michelle Pfieffer, Eartha Kitt,Lee Merriweather-- 那Halle Barry只能排第五了

[17:25.97]Please,I'm begging you. Go to sleep. Julie Newmar Michelle Pfieffer Eartha Kitt Lee Merriweather...

[17:28.27]I'm trying. I'm counting Catwomen. 求求你了 睡觉吧

[17:31.24]我在努力嘛 都在数猫女郎了

[17:35.87]She did make a fine mutant in the X-Men movies,though.

[17:38.59]Oh,for God's sake. 她在X战警里演的变种人倒是不赖

[17:39.56]She's not my favorite of the X-Men.

[17:40.88]In order that would be: Wolverine,Cyclops-- 噢 我求求你了

[17:43.13]Oh,wait,I forgot Professor X. X战警里我最喜欢的不是她

[17:44.69]Professor X,Wolverine,Cyclops, Iceman,then Storm,Angel,the Beast-- 要排序的话应该是:金钢狼 雷射眼

[17:46.10]噢 等等 我忘了X教授

[17:49.07]No,wait,Nightcrawler. X教授 金钢狼 雷射眼 冰人 然后是暴风女 天使 还有野兽

[17:51.11]Professor X,Nightcrawler,Wolverine, Cyclops,Iceman,then Storm,Angel... 不对 等等 还有蓝魔人

[17:54.08]X教授 蓝魔人 金钢狼 雷射眼 冰人 暴风女 天使...

[17:56.72]I'm coming!

[17:59.69]来了!

[18:02.08]There he is. There my old buddy bud bud.

[18:05.05]是他 我的老-伙-计

[18:11.70]What's with him?

[18:13.06]Koothrappali dumped him on me, and he couldn't get to sleep,

[18:15.58]so I gave him a glass of warm milk with a handful of my mom's Valium in it... 他是怎么了?

[18:16.03]Koothrappali把他扔给了我 他睡不着觉

[18:18.55]所以我给他倒了杯温牛奶 里面放了一把我妈的安眠药

[18:21.77]but he still wouldn't shut up,so tag,you're It.

[18:24.74]可他还是不肯住嘴 得了 还给你吧

[18:28.97]I'm ba-a-a-ack.

[18:32.23]I still don't know why you left. 我回...来了

[18:33.99]I can't tell you. 我还是不知道你为啥要走

[18:35.28]Why not?

[18:36.60]I promised Penny. 不能告诉你

[18:39.71]You promised Penny what? 为什么?

[18:39.57]我答应过Penny

[18:41.29]I wouldn't tell you the secret. 你答应她什么了?

[18:44.26]我答应她保密啊

[18:47.81]What secret? Tell me the secret.

[18:50.78]什么秘密? 快告诉我

[18:54.01]Mom smokes in the car.

[18:56.98]老妈在车里抽烟

[18:58.81]Jesus is okay with it but we can't tell Dad.

[19:01.78]耶稣觉得没问题 不过不能告诉老爸

[19:04.33]Not that secret. The other secret.

[19:06.74]- I'm Batman-- Shh! - Damn it! Sheldon! 不是这个 另一个秘密

[19:09.71]- 我是蝙蝠侠 嘘! - 我靠! Sheldon!

[19:13.49]You said Penny told you a secret. What's the secret?

[19:17.06]Okay,I'll tell you,but you can't tell Leonard. 你说 Penny跟你说了个秘密 什么秘密?

[19:20.03]好吧 我告诉你 不过你不能告诉Leonard

[19:22.21]I promise.

[19:24.30]Penny lied about graduating from community college 我保证

[19:27.07]'cause she's afraid she's not smart enough for Leonard. Penny说她是社区大学毕业 其实没这回事

[19:30.04]因为她怕自己不够聪明 配不上Leonard

[19:34.62]So it's nothing I did? It's her problem?

[19:37.89]I drank milk that tasted funny. 不是我做错什么了? 是她的问题?

[19:40.86]我喝了杯牛奶 味道真好玩儿

[19:44.65]Penny thinks I'm too smart for her. That's ridiculous.

[19:48.08]I know. Penny觉得我太聪明 这也太搞笑了

[19:50.70]Most of your work is extremely derivative. 我明白

[19:54.36]And don't worry,that's not a secret. 你的大部分工作 都不是原创的

[19:57.29]Everybody knows. 别担心 这就不是秘密了

[20:00.26]谁都知道

[20:05.06]Listen,I know what's been bothering you about us,and I have the answer.

[20:08.75]What are you talking about? 听着 我已经知道我们之间的问题了 我也有了解决方案

[20:09.70]Okay,first,I want to say that it's not Sheldon's fault.

[20:12.41]He tried very hard to keep your secret. 你在说什么?

[20:14.37]If Howard hadn't drugged him,he would've taken it to his grave. 好的 首先 这不是Sheldon的错

[20:16.38]他已经很努力地替你保密了

[20:18.32]He told you? 要不是Howard给他灌了安眠药 他是不会自掘坟墓的

[20:19.37]Yes,but it's okay.

[20:20.94]Now that we know what the problem is there's a simple solution. 他告诉你了?

[20:23.34]是的 不过这没关系

[20:24.99]Pasadena City College? 既然我们都知道问题何在 要解决岂不是很容易

[20:27.39]A place for fun,a place for knowledge.

[20:28.96]帕萨迪纳城市学院? (托福分数线最低的学校之一)

[20:31.36]"给你知识 给你乐趣"

[20:33.54]See,this man here is playing hackey-sack, and this girl's gonna be a paralegal.

[20:37.51]看见没? 这男的在玩沙包球 那女的会成为律师助手

[20:39.10]Oh,I get it.

[20:40.40]Because Dr. Leonard Hofstadter can't date a girl without a fancy college degree.

[20:43.07]噢 我明白了

[20:45.63]Well,it's really not that fancy. Leonard Hofstadter博士没法和一个 没有名牌大学文凭的女孩子谈恋爱

[20:47.26]It's just a city college.

[20:49.92]Right,but I have to have some sort of degree to date you? 嗯... 其实这也不是个名校

[20:52.65]That doesn't matter to me at all. 只是城市学院而已

[20:54.39]So it's fine with you if I'm not smart. 没错 不过要和你约会 总得有个学位什么的是吧?

[20:57.07]Absolutely. 这对我而言一点都不重要

[20:58.36]所以如果我不聪明也没关系

[21:01.04]绝对没关系

[21:03.67]Okay,this time,I know where I went wrong.

[21:07.64]好吧 这次我知道我错在哪儿了

[21:09.19]Bite me!

[21:12.66]你能拿我怎么样啊?!