经典英语笑话100篇-4

Patient: Doctor help me please, every time I drink a cup of coffee I get

this intense stinging in my eye.

Doctor: I suggest you remove the

spoon before drinking.

Men 1845: I just killed a buffalo.

Men 1952: I just fixed the

roof.

Men 2017: I just shaved my legs.

I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in,

talking in an interesting accent.

So I said, “Cool accent, are you

two ladies from Ireland?”

One of them snarled at me, “It’s Wales,

dumbo!”

So I corrected myself, “Oh, right, so are you two whales

from Ireland?”

That’s about as far as I remember.

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s 7 years in a row

now.

The inventor of AutoCorrect is a stupid mass hole. He can fake right

off.

A naked women robbed a bank. Nobody could remember her face.

A police officer stops a car.

Officer: “Your driver’s license

please.”

Driver: “I’m really sorry, I forgot.”

Officer: “At

home?”

Driver: “No, to do it.”

Why is women’s soccer so rare?

It’s quite hard to find enough

women willing to wear the same outfit.

I was making Russian tea. Unfortunately I cannot fish the teabag out of

the vodka bottle.

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