剧情概要
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Claire发现Luke用她的电脑看黄色照片,扬言要好好教育Luke,Phil主动要求解决此事。Cameron总是无法拒绝帮助别人,这让Mitchell 不胜其烦。Luke 偷看了Haley的日记,而Haley却以为是Alex偷看的。
中英字幕
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早晨天气不错哈?
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还得上班很不爽吧?
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是啊
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我要一份香肠和辣肠披萨
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那是我的东西好不好?
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- 别碰我的东西!
- 嗨!
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- 我压根就没动过!
- 嗨!
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等一下 Derek
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什么事啊?
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Alex看了我的日记
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我才没有!
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我干嘛要看你没用的日记啊?
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因为我生活丰富多彩 你嫉妒我!
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哦!
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Alex 下次别偷看Haley的日记了
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不好意思 我的女儿们在吵
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你有孩子吗?
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哦 那真是...
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Phil!
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哦 那是我老婆 Claire
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Luke在用我的电脑 看这个
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呃...我回头再打给你
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他说他要用来做功课 我却发现了
一张半裸女人的照片
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还是我见过的最超级的波霸
还开个拖拉机
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好吧 首先 那是联合收割机 不是拖拉机
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Phil! 这是淫图耶 我们十岁的小儿子
在看淫图啊!
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太恶心了!
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绝对不能接受
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事情是这样的 那是我的图片
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其实不完全是我的
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我同事发了链接给我
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是谁...谁不重要
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是Gil Thorpe
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他还发了一张那女的穿战舰制服的
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你懂的
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还有一张变形金刚主题的
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她...
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其实我之前想过告诉Claire的
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我只想让她先冷静下来
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你去哪儿?
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我打算把他从过夜派对里接回来
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我们必须马上谈谈这件事
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Claire这个状况现在很微妙
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如果我们处理不妥的话 Luke可能
对性福生活会产生不良印象
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或者是农业方面
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我们等他回来再谈吧
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好吧
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但我会告诉他每次他看A片
上帝都会杀掉一只小狗狗
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要不让我来跟他说吧
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我是个幸福的女人
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有和睦的家庭 漂亮的房子
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没有任何需要改变了
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我恨死恶狗管家雕塑了
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我总是忘记它的存在
每次看到都吓一大跳
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有时候大半夜就觉得像见鬼了
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魔鬼啊
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狗管家?
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那玩意儿超搞笑的
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我上个月在拉斯维加斯赢钱了
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我就想我可以再继续赌下去把赢的输光
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也可以给自己买个赌场纪念品回来
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他已经是家里最受欢迎的了
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摸他下巴下面 他最喜欢了
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笑一个 美人儿
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好啦
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他是条狗又是个管家
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谁能不爱他呢?
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蠢狗
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<font color=#38B0DE>-=伊甸园美剧论坛 http://bbs.sfileydy.com=-
荣誉出品
本字幕仅供学习交流 严禁用于商业途径</font>
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00:03:06,332 --> 00:03:10,482
<font color=#38B0DE>-=YTET-伊甸园字幕组=-
翻译: 樱桃炸弹 andrea942
校对: Vee
时间轴: sunshine_zp </font>
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<font color=#38B0DE>摩登家庭
第一季 第十二集
BD版本调教:Tearemix</font>
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好了 准备就绪
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哦 你嘘嘘过了没
74
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你当我三岁小孩啊?
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不是呀 演出开始了你就没法去了
76
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木偶们会停下来 走到舞台边指着你
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哦 听起来挺吓人的
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那才搞笑呢
79
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我最美好的童年回忆是去看莫斯科玩偶剧
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我成长在距密苏里最大 全国第三大瀑布
一公里远的地方
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是吗?Cam你怎么以前从没提过
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- 你会感觉像...
- 像鱼雷爆炸一样
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Cam园丁一般星期六来吗?
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我不知道 我们有需要了他就来吧
85
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他有点像蝙蝠侠 不过他是直男
86
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他是不是在哭?
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貌似是的
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我们该...
89
00:03:54,972 --> 00:03:56,592
从后门走了吧?
90
00:03:56,762 --> 00:03:58,102
他明显很痛苦啊
91
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你怎么能在这个时候丢下朋友呢?
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朋友? 他叫什么名字?
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00:04:03,552 --> 00:04:06,062
Cesar Salazar
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你瞎编的
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你本来想说"凯撒色拉"
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才不是
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Cam 别这样 你来真的?
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没事的别担心 Lily
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我们会准时去看演出的
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希望爸爸只是出去安慰一下那个园丁
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提一下那个蜗牛的事 然后我们就...
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不要啊
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Cam你不是吧
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你好
105
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:32,770
他好像不会讲英语
105
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好吧 或许现在不是时候 但我要提醒你
106
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木偶们对迟到的人不太友好
107
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他们会俯身警告迟到者
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00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:40,432
好吧 我能说一点点西班牙语
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先生 你要做一点水吗?
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你要睡我们的床吗?
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你说了啥?
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我刚问了他要不要喝点水坐下来休息会
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就是一般好心人会问的
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好了 我检查过家里其他所有的电脑了
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没发现其他黄片了
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那根本不能算是黄片
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就是一个半裸女人开着拖拉机而已
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你知道欧洲人怎么叫这个吗?
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麦片广告
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我必须跟他谈谈
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亲爱的亲爱的亲爱的 我来!
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不不不
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我来 我有过那种经历
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咪咪现在对他来说充满神秘的诱惑
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那我更要跟他谈谈了
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不不不不!
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男孩不希望和妈妈讨论性话题
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就像女孩不希望和爸爸讨论例假啊
内衣啊束腰带之类的东西
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女的不穿束胸都好几十年了好不好
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亲爱的 这我知道
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这正是像我们儿子正在经历的那种性改革
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我们只要...只要相信他就行了
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修一下那个
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相信我会处理好的 行不?
135
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见鬼了!
136
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Gloria 为啥狗管家被放在客房里
137
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我在重新归置家里的摆设
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换个地方放换种感觉
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这样啊 不过放在客房也太扯了吧
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他又不是客人 他是仆人
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来帮我一把行不?
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我觉得搬他的时候他的外套移位了
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小管家 我们不能让你衣衫不整啊
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太荒唐了 对不?
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怎么了? 他还好吗?
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哦 我的手链好像勾到了
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放松 别紧张
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我又没有紧张
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没事 试着放松 我们能搞定的
让我看清楚点
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过来这边
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Luke?
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- 嗨 老爸
- 嗨 兄弟
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听着 我们必须谈一下
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什么事?
155
00:07:00,900 --> 00:07:03,030
嗯 是关于电脑的
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你怎么确保看了一些东西之后把它删了?
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对不起啦 Jay 我不是故意的
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我开始怀疑你根本就不喜欢狗管家
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你看 你先是把它藏到客房 现在又这样
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简直荒唐!
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我真的不是故意弄坏的!
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首先 不是"它"
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是"他"
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你可以不承认 但事实胜于雄辩
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是啊
166
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那不是很显然的嘛 (猥琐的姿势...)
167
00:07:36,370 --> 00:07:37,620
你什么意思?
168
00:07:37,780 --> 00:07:42,370
没什么 但你必须承认狗管家很荒谬
169
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你知道什么更荒谬吗?
170
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你在我们床上放的那一堆垫子
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我觉得像在码头搬货一样 搬完才能上床
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- 它们很漂亮
- 烦都烦死了
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好吧 请原谅我试着把家里弄得这么漂亮
174
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好吧 如果我能忍受这些 你也能忍受
这一小件艺术品
175
00:07:58,390 --> 00:07:59,370
这是哪门子艺术
176
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:02,780
这不过是个不合理的人兽混合体罢了
177
00:08:02,790 --> 00:08:03,670
不过没关系
178
00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:06,410
既然你这么喜欢 随便你放哪里
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谢谢你
180
00:08:08,090 --> 00:08:09,330
你去哪? 再搞点枕头垫子来?
181
00:08:09,500 --> 00:08:11,000
不 别担心
182
00:08:11,170 --> 00:08:15,100
我短期内不会再用枕头来烦你了
183
00:08:18,260 --> 00:08:20,580
老爸在Luke房间关着门干啥?
184
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他们在谈心
185
00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:23,520
Luke受罚了?
186
00:08:23,710 --> 00:08:26,730
看你姐或者弟有麻烦啊你是不是特爽?
187
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最爽的是他俩一起有麻烦
188
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他到底干啥了?
189
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他是不是考试作弊了?他就是这种人
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他没有
191
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- 他是不是吹牛了?
- Alex
192
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- 他一向这样
- Alex
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不好意思
194
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我只是...只是担心Luke
195
00:08:40,160 --> 00:08:41,800
很多家长又开始体罚了
196
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谢谢你关心 你爸会掌握好的
197
00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:52,800
你偷跑!
198
00:08:53,230 --> 00:08:54,880
要罚你 来吧
199
00:09:01,550 --> 00:09:03,470
这次我放在下面咯?
200
00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:10,060
怎么样了?
201
00:09:10,220 --> 00:09:14,090
他非常羞愧尴尬 不过一切都好了
202
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你怎么说的?
203
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你知道的 我保证说这是我们俩的秘密
204
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你再跟他提起这事就伤感情了
205
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再也别提了
206
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哦天啊 真的吗?
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这让我还真挺不好受的呢
208
00:09:29,780 --> 00:09:30,630
其实
209
00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:34,440
你可能只是对这一切感到太紧张了
210
00:09:35,110 --> 00:09:36,670
我就是这样
211
00:09:37,850 --> 00:09:39,940
你知道现在什么最有帮助吗?
212
00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:44,270
真的吗? 现在?
213
00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:50,230
我意思是出去吃点披萨
214
00:09:50,630 --> 00:09:52,010
你脑子里尽想什么呢?
215
00:09:53,890 --> 00:09:56,390
我和一群性爱狂住在一起啊
216
00:09:59,530 --> 00:10:00,660
伙计?
217
00:10:00,820 --> 00:10:02,960
我们很想帮你但你不出来我们没办法啊
218
00:10:03,130 --> 00:10:04,980
感谢你邀请我到你家(西班牙语)
219
00:10:05,170 --> 00:10:06,750
我感到很惭愧(西班牙语)
220
00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:07,590
他说啥?
221
00:10:07,750 --> 00:10:09,520
什么 房子 什么
222
00:10:09,530 --> 00:10:10,280
得了吧!
223
00:10:10,470 --> 00:10:12,630
表演半个小时就要开始了
我们还要去接Manny
224
00:10:12,810 --> 00:10:14,310
我们能不能抓紧时间
225
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,160
这家伙现在处于危机之中
226
00:10:16,300 --> 00:10:20,260
他可能家里有人生重病或者自己生重病
或者有经济问题
227
00:10:20,270 --> 00:10:20,870
好好 等等
228
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:23,460
你从"什么房子什么"就能知道这么多了?
229
00:10:23,750 --> 00:10:26,570
我们打给Gloria让她来处理好不好?
230
00:10:26,740 --> 00:10:28,790
他也是个人耶 Mitchell!
231
00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:30,120
他还叫凯撒色拉呢
232
00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:32,020
你到底怎么了?
233
00:10:32,170 --> 00:10:33,140
Cam 你 唉
234
00:10:33,290 --> 00:10:34,140
你总是这样!
235
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:37,313
你总是听不得别人痛苦的经历
236
00:10:37,314 --> 00:10:41,490
忍不住要去帮人家
把我的需求放在第二位
237
00:10:41,630 --> 00:10:44,430
你现在的需求只是想看木偶演出
238
00:10:44,590 --> 00:10:47,620
这家伙的兄弟可能在缆车事故里死了耶!
239
00:10:47,780 --> 00:10:49,810
你又知道嘞!
240
00:10:49,820 --> 00:10:50,550
好好好
241
00:10:50,730 --> 00:10:55,418
如果去看木偶戏可以向你证明
我不是你所谓的"助人为乐强迫症"
242
00:10:55,419 --> 00:10:56,910
那我们这就去
243
00:10:56,920 --> 00:10:57,440
Cam
244
00:10:57,450 --> 00:10:58,590
走吧!
245
00:11:02,890 --> 00:11:04,830
我觉得这跟那园丁有关
246
00:11:05,020 --> 00:11:06,360
你觉得?
247
00:11:06,540 --> 00:11:08,110
从客厅向右走
248
00:11:08,310 --> 00:11:09,620
多谢了
249
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:10,800
劳驾
250
00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:14,150
行 我们走吧
251
00:11:14,230 --> 00:11:17,300
别这样--我知道你要是不能回去
管管这事儿会难受死的
252
00:11:17,470 --> 00:11:19,000
不不不 我们要走了
253
00:11:19,230 --> 00:11:21,310
这些人自己能解决
254
00:11:21,490 --> 00:11:25,270
现在你知道了吧
我才不是整天拯救迷失的灵魂的慈善家
255
00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:26,790
我晕 又来
256
00:11:33,377 --> 00:11:35,047
- 老爸?
- 这边呢
257
00:11:35,297 --> 00:11:36,097
Manny好了没?
258
00:11:36,427 --> 00:11:37,767
你没收到信息吗? 他不去了
259
00:11:37,777 --> 00:11:38,217
什么?
260
00:11:38,377 --> 00:11:41,647
他学校要做义务大扫除呢
261
00:11:42,327 --> 00:11:43,557
到底是为什么?
262
00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:45,307
因为这就是个木偶戏啊 Mitch
263
00:11:45,597 --> 00:11:46,437
好着呢
264
00:11:46,967 --> 00:11:49,077
行吧 那就只有咱俩了 Lily
265
00:11:49,087 --> 00:11:50,207
那个小福饼呢?
266
00:11:50,387 --> 00:11:51,727
她--她好着呢
267
00:11:52,157 --> 00:11:53,007
Cam去哪了?
268
00:11:53,657 --> 00:11:55,347
我俩吵了一架
269
00:11:55,597 --> 00:11:58,217
就是因为他 现在我家一屋子的拉美人
270
00:11:58,377 --> 00:11:59,527
欢迎来到我的世界
271
00:12:00,057 --> 00:12:01,777
哈 同志乐园有麻烦喽
272
00:12:01,997 --> 00:12:03,869
他根本就没法拒绝别人的请求
273
00:12:03,870 --> 00:12:06,497
还有你干嘛非得
把"同志"的名头到处强加?
274
00:12:06,827 --> 00:12:08,037
咳咳 你生我气干嘛啊
275
00:12:08,497 --> 00:12:10,307
你应该生你"娇妻"的气才对
276
00:12:10,467 --> 00:12:12,137
行 说得好 待会儿见
277
00:12:12,227 --> 00:12:13,857
别么 我不是故意这么说的
278
00:12:13,997 --> 00:12:15,227
我有点烦躁
279
00:12:15,657 --> 00:12:17,077
我和Gloria吵了一小架
280
00:12:17,087 --> 00:12:18,447
不是吧 怎么了?
281
00:12:18,497 --> 00:12:19,857
她不喜欢Barkley
282
00:12:20,517 --> 00:12:23,651
跟你妈妈一个毛病
283
00:12:23,652 --> 00:12:25,977
让我不许碰船 不去骑摩托
284
00:12:25,987 --> 00:12:27,407
你知道的 我喜欢这些
285
00:12:27,917 --> 00:12:29,467
那你干嘛要丢掉它?
286
00:12:31,007 --> 00:12:32,217
其实我没想扔
287
00:12:33,287 --> 00:12:35,147
我要在这儿帮他把手粘好
288
00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:36,657
手给掉了
289
00:12:36,817 --> 00:12:37,977
糟糕的一天啊 老爸
290
00:12:38,137 --> 00:12:40,007
你年轻美貌的老婆不喜欢你的洋娃娃
291
00:12:40,017 --> 00:12:43,977
哈 又不像你的大麻烦
"我男朋友对别人都太好了"
292
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:46,017
不是 不止这样
293
00:12:46,197 --> 00:12:47,857
他还救助小动物
294
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,617
还做很多的义工
295
00:12:49,747 --> 00:12:52,047
相信我--情况比我说的更严重
296
00:12:52,207 --> 00:12:54,617
我们说这些骗谁呢? 咱俩过得都很好
297
00:12:55,147 --> 00:12:59,117
我跟Gloria吵这事
其实更多是像和你妈吵
298
00:12:59,127 --> 00:13:01,777
小鸟从树上掉下来
他都要用眼药水瓶喂它
299
00:13:01,967 --> 00:13:02,797
儿子 别纠结了
300
00:13:02,937 --> 00:13:07,927
我们都跟与我们不同的人在一起
虽然会有摩擦 但是你想要这样的不同
301
00:13:08,117 --> 00:13:11,407
我和你妈看上去是多么完美的一对儿
但你也知道我们怎么结束的
302
00:13:12,067 --> 00:13:15,287
我现在拥有的一切都要好得多
303
00:13:15,857 --> 00:13:19,237
当然 有时候大家会看我们
甚至有时我自己都不相信我们居然在一起
304
00:13:19,417 --> 00:13:20,547
但是我们很幸福
305
00:13:21,207 --> 00:13:24,427
每天结束的时候 我都只想回到她的身边
306
00:13:30,037 --> 00:13:31,447
你是说Gloria?
307
00:13:33,137 --> 00:13:34,317
还能有谁?
308
00:13:35,117 --> 00:13:36,237
没事儿
309
00:13:37,757 --> 00:13:39,077
待会儿见
310
00:13:39,087 --> 00:13:40,157
再见 儿子
311
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,347
你是不是在我海报上乱画了?
312
00:13:45,577 --> 00:13:46,787
是我干的
313
00:13:46,957 --> 00:13:49,467
下次你再偷看我日记的时候好好想想!
314
00:13:49,637 --> 00:13:53,907
我才没偷看你的破日记!
还有 这签名是我排了好长的队弄来的!
315
00:13:54,077 --> 00:13:55,677
别幼稚了
316
00:13:55,847 --> 00:13:57,827
就是一发型诡异的非主流么!
317
00:13:58,497 --> 00:14:01,257
你个文盲 这可是Maya Angelou!
318
00:14:01,637 --> 00:14:04,107
不好意思啊 我不看WNBA
319
00:14:04,287 --> 00:14:05,057
你知道吗?
320
00:14:05,067 --> 00:14:08,877
这是你干的最坏的一件事儿
我永远都不会原谅你!
321
00:14:09,047 --> 00:14:10,647
是你先的!
322
00:14:11,467 --> 00:14:12,587
你看什么看!
323
00:14:12,757 --> 00:14:17,767
我刚听到-
是我看了Haley的日记
324
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:20,607
我玩她电脑呢 然后它自己打开了
325
00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:24,217
好吧 是我打开的
326
00:14:24,377 --> 00:14:26,257
但我不想有人吵架啊
327
00:14:29,007 --> 00:14:31,037
你都回来了 嗨 Mitchell!
328
00:14:31,047 --> 00:14:32,497
嗨 Cam
329
00:14:32,627 --> 00:14:33,617
你忘记带票了?
330
00:14:33,777 --> 00:14:36,617
不是 要是你不去我去了肯定也没劲
331
00:14:37,277 --> 00:14:40,127
但是你很期待带Lily去看俄国牵线木偶啊
332
00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:41,527
反正她这么小 肯定也看不懂
333
00:14:41,747 --> 00:14:43,887
就让她在烘干机那儿待半个小时吧
334
00:14:44,407 --> 00:14:47,457
听着 Cam 我很欣赏你
想让世界变得更美好的精神
335
00:14:47,687 --> 00:14:50,637
而且我很幸运生命中能有你相伴
336
00:14:50,787 --> 00:14:51,837
哦 Mtichell
337
00:14:51,987 --> 00:14:53,187
那园丁怎么样了?
338
00:14:53,347 --> 00:14:54,487
好着呢
339
00:14:54,627 --> 00:14:56,647
原来今天是他的婚礼 他有点紧张而已
340
00:14:56,887 --> 00:14:57,257
但是你知道吗
341
00:14:57,267 --> 00:14:59,487
- 你不用跟我道歉的
- 一定要的
342
00:14:59,627 --> 00:15:00,887
是我太自私了
343
00:15:00,897 --> 00:15:03,217
没有 有时候是我做得有点过了
344
00:15:03,227 --> 00:15:06,447
- 好吧 要是你做过了的话我会提醒你的
- 好的
345
00:15:11,047 --> 00:15:12,107
你不想让我进去吗?
346
00:15:12,257 --> 00:15:14,327
没啊
347
00:15:15,697 --> 00:15:18,617
牧师: 现在我宣布你们结为夫妻
348
00:15:18,767 --> 00:15:19,607
现在你们可以亲吻了
349
00:15:28,317 --> 00:15:30,647
妈妈我有话跟你说
350
00:15:30,787 --> 00:15:32,087
好啊宝贝 怎么了?
351
00:15:32,417 --> 00:15:34,617
我为我做的一件事感觉很难受
352
00:15:34,897 --> 00:15:36,647
宝贝儿
353
00:15:36,827 --> 00:15:38,257
是关于电脑的事吗?
354
00:15:38,267 --> 00:15:39,077
嗯
355
00:15:39,237 --> 00:15:40,887
你看了不该看的东西?
356
00:15:41,057 --> 00:15:41,807
嗯
357
00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:43,847
好畸形啊
358
00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:45,367
我都停不下来
359
00:15:45,727 --> 00:15:49,157
我知道 但是宝贝儿
重要的是你还是停下来了
360
00:15:49,417 --> 00:15:50,127
是啊
361
00:15:50,587 --> 00:15:51,947
不过看了一个多小时才停的
362
00:15:52,437 --> 00:15:56,797
好吧 你对这些事儿好奇再正常不过了
363
00:15:56,807 --> 00:15:58,027
有些还挺好玩的
364
00:15:58,377 --> 00:16:00,567
但是有的好疯狂
365
00:16:00,757 --> 00:16:04,877
我希望你知道有些并不是真的
366
00:16:05,027 --> 00:16:06,307
很显然
367
00:16:06,667 --> 00:16:08,857
但是也可能都是真的 对吧?
368
00:16:09,387 --> 00:16:10,457
就像<安妮弗兰克回忆录>那种
369
00:16:10,467 --> 00:16:11,237
什么?
370
00:16:11,397 --> 00:16:14,007
我现在只是很好奇Haley
371
00:16:15,317 --> 00:16:16,867
这样很恶心啊 宝贝
372
00:16:16,877 --> 00:16:17,857
为什么是Haley?
373
00:16:18,007 --> 00:16:19,137
是她的日记啊
374
00:16:19,307 --> 00:16:21,487
你偷看了我的日记? 小混蛋!
375
00:16:21,497 --> 00:16:22,257
对不起嘛
376
00:16:22,427 --> 00:16:23,317
我没忍住
377
00:16:23,497 --> 00:16:24,847
什么 Haley的日记也是你偷看的?
378
00:16:25,017 --> 00:16:26,847
Luke 现在你不许再玩电脑了
379
00:16:26,857 --> 00:16:27,327
什么?
380
00:16:27,517 --> 00:16:28,857
怎么了? 谁有麻烦了?
381
00:16:28,867 --> 00:16:30,347
Luke偷看了我的日记!
382
00:16:30,507 --> 00:16:31,577
我说了吧 不是我!
383
00:16:31,707 --> 00:16:32,867
我要杀了你
384
00:16:33,017 --> 00:16:33,967
Haley 冷静!
385
00:16:34,107 --> 00:16:36,617
怎么 你都不训他? 那可是我的隐私啊!
386
00:16:36,627 --> 00:16:37,137
得了吧
387
00:16:37,267 --> 00:16:38,907
最劲爆的也就是你的错别字了
388
00:16:39,077 --> 00:16:40,097
你也偷看了?
389
00:16:40,247 --> 00:16:41,987
我是唯一一个没看的?
390
00:16:42,147 --> 00:16:45,277
我在检查你们的电脑看有没有色情信息
391
00:16:45,527 --> 00:16:46,357
好恶心
392
00:16:46,487 --> 00:16:47,257
不是我自己要看啊
393
00:16:47,267 --> 00:16:48,727
我想看看你们都在干嘛
394
00:16:48,927 --> 00:16:50,577
你侵犯了我们的隐私!
395
00:16:50,717 --> 00:16:54,446
如果我发现我小孩在网上看裸体图片
396
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:55,917
他们就没有隐私了!
397
00:16:56,067 --> 00:16:57,317
谁看裸体图片了?
398
00:16:57,497 --> 00:16:58,207
这不重要
399
00:16:58,487 --> 00:17:00,187
反正不是我
400
00:17:00,567 --> 00:17:01,447
也不是我!
401
00:17:01,627 --> 00:17:02,397
好恶心!
402
00:17:02,567 --> 00:17:03,587
我才10岁
403
00:17:03,597 --> 00:17:04,137
等等
404
00:17:04,327 --> 00:17:05,397
你们这些人脑子有问题吧
405
00:17:05,577 --> 00:17:07,367
不是你是谁?
406
00:17:08,297 --> 00:17:10,367
比萨饼来喽!
407
00:17:12,837 --> 00:17:13,847
- Rosa 真谢谢你能来
- 非常感谢
408
00:17:13,967 --> 00:17:15,777
Carlos 一定要告诉我你牙医那边的进展
409
00:17:16,087 --> 00:17:18,087
Victor 你欠我一支舞呢
410
00:17:18,277 --> 00:17:20,722
是的 我是个同情心泛滥的人
要不是Mtichell的话
411
00:17:20,723 --> 00:17:23,277
我就会一直付出付出付出
412
00:17:23,447 --> 00:17:25,718
就像一个失控了的慈善大卡车
413
00:17:25,719 --> 00:17:28,787
Mitchell就是我的高速路出口
铺满了细砾
414
00:17:28,977 --> 00:17:30,437
他懂得怎样让我刹车
415
00:17:30,607 --> 00:17:32,697
他总是能先为自己考虑
416
00:17:33,077 --> 00:17:35,517
他绝对可以对别人的苦楚不管不顾
417
00:17:39,717 --> 00:17:41,297
没事 真的 继续
418
00:17:42,647 --> 00:17:45,417
- 他...
- 继续个毛啊
419
00:17:46,557 --> 00:17:47,667
再见
420
00:17:48,957 --> 00:17:50,307
真的好好
421
00:17:52,817 --> 00:17:54,547
吓死我了! 老爸!
422
00:17:55,167 --> 00:17:56,607
我貌似错过聚会了?
423
00:17:56,777 --> 00:17:57,907
它来这干嘛?
424
00:17:58,037 --> 00:18:00,457
送给你和Cam的礼物!
425
00:18:00,897 --> 00:18:01,497
谢谢
426
00:18:01,657 --> 00:18:02,787
他的单片眼镜儿路上丢了
427
00:18:03,217 --> 00:18:04,067
他把头伸出窗外了
428
00:18:04,497 --> 00:18:05,487
大家都喜欢那眼镜儿呢
429
00:18:05,657 --> 00:18:06,597
我暂时把他放这儿
430
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:08,827
我不想要那个玩意儿
431
00:18:09,067 --> 00:18:10,557
我觉得他很可爱啊 给他个机会嘛
432
00:18:10,697 --> 00:18:12,477
我听到你消息就赶过来了
433
00:18:12,637 --> 00:18:14,357
你是不是说有人在举行婚礼?
434
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:15,467
Gloria 你在这呢!
435
00:18:15,817 --> 00:18:16,757
我有好消息哦!
436
00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:24,187
怎么了?
437
00:18:27,407 --> 00:18:28,417
亲爱的?
438
00:18:30,607 --> 00:18:31,897
我很抱歉
439
00:18:32,717 --> 00:18:35,027
那个图片是别人发给我的
440
00:18:35,317 --> 00:18:36,477
是谁不重要
441
00:18:36,977 --> 00:18:37,817
其实是Gil Thorpe
442
00:18:38,047 --> 00:18:39,747
不管怎样
443
00:18:40,977 --> 00:18:42,327
我不干那事儿
444
00:18:42,487 --> 00:18:43,627
我有你就足够了
445
00:18:43,807 --> 00:18:46,347
那个...亲爱的 没关系
446
00:18:46,557 --> 00:18:47,487
真的没关系
447
00:18:50,977 --> 00:18:52,347
现在好了
448
00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:56,267
我才不紧张那个图片呢
449
00:18:56,647 --> 00:18:58,727
我之前紧张是因为我以为是Luke在看
450
00:18:59,607 --> 00:19:02,657
Haley 宝贝儿
我很希望你能来帮我洗衣服
451
00:19:02,667 --> 00:19:04,687
想都别想
452
00:19:04,907 --> 00:19:06,177
Haley沉浸在自己的世界中
453
00:19:07,197 --> 00:19:09,437
Alex一直都很少年老成
454
00:19:09,977 --> 00:19:12,237
但是Luke是我的小宝贝啊
455
00:19:12,397 --> 00:19:16,797
我就想让他永远是那个乖巧天真的小孩子
456
00:19:17,727 --> 00:19:18,787
这样的要求很过分吗?
457
00:19:24,157 --> 00:19:25,177
嗨 哥们
458
00:19:26,157 --> 00:19:28,407
别急 等会儿
459
00:19:28,727 --> 00:19:29,947
待会儿再拍
460
00:19:31,297 --> 00:19:34,007
我想跟你说声对不起
461
00:19:34,557 --> 00:19:37,447
关于那个照片的事儿 我从没想怪过你
462
00:19:37,637 --> 00:19:42,007
你妈好像认为是你的
我应该跟她说明 但是我没有
463
00:19:42,457 --> 00:19:44,387
那是个什么图?
464
00:19:45,467 --> 00:19:50,597
一个女的 坐在拖拉机上 没穿上衣
465
00:19:51,147 --> 00:19:52,207
很热吗?
466
00:19:53,367 --> 00:19:55,447
好吧 我们就实话实说了
467
00:19:56,827 --> 00:19:58,468
那个女的
468
00:19:58,469 --> 00:20:04,287
身材线条很对我胃口
而且那个牛仔帽也很有味道
469
00:20:04,487 --> 00:20:07,567
再加上那个毛边牛仔短裤--
你是在问天气对吧?!
470
00:20:07,767 --> 00:20:08,787
是啊
471
00:20:11,037 --> 00:20:12,757
好着呢
472
00:20:12,947 --> 00:20:14,197
好得很
473
00:20:14,907 --> 00:20:17,492
很快你就会有一些变化了
474
00:20:17,493 --> 00:20:20,887
现在你尽管放心 想跟我说什么就说什么
475
00:20:31,291 --> 00:20:43,161
很快我被主人Cameron和Mitchell解雇了
前者为人宽厚 后者是毫无幽默感的势利鬼
476
00:20:43,171 --> 00:20:44,841
快点把它弄到车上去 旧货店要关门了
477
00:20:45,031 --> 00:20:53,391
你说的这个激动人心的旧货店是什么呢
我的很多亲戚都被赶出家园 闯荡世界
478
00:20:53,401 --> 00:20:54,891
你说了"闯荡世界"?
479
00:20:55,051 --> 00:20:58,011
放开我 你个暴君
480
00:20:58,191 --> 00:21:02,601
我给你钱 我不差钱
我一直在偷你爸的钱
481
00:21:02,791 --> 00:21:07,021
没有比在风中扇动耳朵更爽的感觉了
482
00:21:07,643 --> 00:21:08,513
你给我下去
483
00:21:08,723 --> 00:21:10,173
你说真的? 放我自由?
484
00:21:10,353 --> 00:21:12,663
不是你Barkley Cameron你给我下去
485
00:21:12,673 --> 00:21:16,763