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00:01.84,	Did you see it?	你看到了吗
00:03.11,	Does she know?	她知道吗
00:04.42,	This is the last thing she needs today.	千万别让她知道了
00:07.02,	No!	别看
00:08.52,	Busy day at the Dunphy compound.	今天邓菲家可忙了
00:09.65,	We have a wedding tonight,	晚上要参加婚礼
00:10.81,	and this afternoon, Claire is debating Duane Bailey	下午克莱尔要和杜恩·贝利辩论
00:12.82,	in the race for town council.	竞选镇议员
00:14.25,	And now the "Weekly Saver" says	而现在 《每周救星》报上说
00:17.01,	that some voters find Claire-- quote--	一些选民认为克莱尔
00:19.36,	Angry and unlikable.	脾气暴躁 讨人嫌
00:21.98,	To those voters, I say,	我想对这些选民说
00:23.65,	Wait till she sees this.	等她发现了 再让你们见识真正的暴躁
00:25.48,	No one can mention it to her.	千万别告诉她
00:28.21,	We can't have some unscientific poll	不能让这些无厘头的民意调查
00:30.15,	shaking Claire's confidence.	打击克莱尔的信心
00:31.79,	Phil...	菲尔
00:33.19,	- What poll? -Too late. She knows.	什么民调-完了 她知道了
00:35.59,	Who told her?	谁告诉她的
00:36.82,	- What is this, a witch hunt? - Oh, my god.	-干嘛 要搞政治迫害吗 -我的天啊
00:40.49,	I have to go.	我得挂了
00:42.26,	Well, I just don't think it's a big deal.	我觉得这没啥大不了的
00:44.18,	I mean, how many people read the "Weekly..."	没多少人会读这《每周...》叫啥来着
00:46.11,	- "Saver"? -"Saver," anyway?	《救星》-《救星》 随便吧
00:48.14,	22,000... ish.	22000左右吧
00:51.34,	My company adver--	我们公司
00:52.88,	used to advertise with that newspaper.	曾经在这报纸上登过广告
00:56.09,	And how am I angry and unlikable?	我怎么就脾气暴躁兼讨人嫌了
00:58.31,	Can I take this one?	我能回答这个问题吗
00:59.38,	I wouldn't.	劝你别
01:00.38,	You seem angry now.	你现在就很暴躁
01:01.55,	I am angry, at that poll.	是这民意调查惹的
01:03.18,	I think it's the yelling. I would tone down the yelling.	我觉得是因为你大吼大叫 说话得温柔点儿
01:05.55,	Honey, I don't yell for no reason.	宝贝 我不会无缘无故大吼
01:07.59,	You yelled at my teacher for calling me "special."	老师说我"与众不同" 你就冲她吼
01:10.12,	Honey, that was not a compliment.	宝贝 她那不是夸你
01:12.16,	- Sweetheart, you're not unlikable. - Thank you.	-亲 你不讨人嫌 -谢谢
01:15.26,	You just seem unlikable.	你只是看起来讨人嫌
01:16.79,	But if we work on it, it's totally fixable.	但如果我们努把力 问题就能解决
01:18.81,	How? How, Phil? How are we gonna "Work on it"?	怎么解决 菲尔 我们怎么"努把力"
01:21.13,	First of all, lose the snippy attitude.	首先 收收你这脾气
01:23.51,	And I don't know--maybe we could have a mock debate.	然后 要不我们来个模拟辩论吧
01:25.29,	Oh. Good idea.	好主意
01:26.28,	That way, mom can rehearse her views on the issues.	这样一来 妈就可以演练一下发表政见了
01:28.27,	Yeah, and we can point out all the little things	是啊 而且我们可以帮她指出
01:29.40,	she does that turn people off.	不讨选民喜欢的小细节
01:31.63,	Like that look. I would lose that look.	比如这副表情 你得改改
01:36.75,	Spooky, but better.	看得我发毛 不过好多了
01:51.26,	All right. Thank you very much.	好的 非常感谢
01:53.47,	Hey, Lily! Come here, honey!	嘿 莉莉 快过来 宝贝
01:56.11,	Hi! Do you know what this is?	嗨 你知道这是什么吗
01:58.61,	A box.	是盒子
01:59.60,	- Containing? -She doesn't know "containing."	-裹着什么 -她不懂"裹着"这个词
02:01.90,	Well, that's how she learns new words, by us using them.	就得这样教她新词汇 言传身教
02:04.10,	Or, that's how we lower her self-esteem,	你整天灌输一些超难词汇
02:05.67,	by bombarding her with confusing vocabulary.	也可能打击她的自尊啊
02:08.04,	What's the box containing?	盒子里裹着什么
02:10.11,	Told you.	说了吧
02:11.08,	Okay. It's your dress.	好吧 是你的裙子
02:12.48,	It's finally here!	终于送到了
02:15.08,	It's every little girl's dream	每个小女孩都梦想着
02:16.62,	to be a flower girl in a wedding.	成为婚礼上的花童
02:18.52,	It's Lily's chance to shine.	这是莉莉大放异彩的机会
02:19.96,	I was a 3-time ring bearer.	我做过三次捧戒指的戒童
02:22.27,	It's lily's chance to shine.	这是莉莉大放异彩的机会
02:27.90,	Pretty!	真漂亮
02:29.02,	Oh, no, Cam--	哦不 小卡
02:30.22,	Cam, she's gonna look like little bo peep.	小卡 穿这身她会像牧羊女小波波
02:32.38,	Or little bo cheap.	或是牧羊女穷波波
02:34.03,	Look at this fabric. It's already pilling.	看这料子 都已经起毛球了
02:36.12,	Maybe it look better on?	穿上身可能会好看点儿
02:37.50,	You mean turned on?	你是说把灯开上吗
02:39.55,	No, it does not--Cam!	不 不行 小卡啊
02:42.52,	I love it!	我喜欢
02:43.18,	No, you don't.	不 不喜欢
02:44.48,	Oh, my gosh. Are we really gonna let her wear this?	我的天 我们真的要给她穿这个吗
02:46.53,	You know what? If the bride wants to have a tacky wedding,	如果新娘想来场俗气婚礼
02:48.70,	She can have a tacky wedding.	就让她俗气去吧
02:49.91,	- Lily will be the bright spot. - Literally.	-咱家莉莉就成"亮"点了 -够"亮"的
02:51.49,	Heard it as soon as I said it.	说出来就后悔了
02:54.18,	Stella!	斯黛拉
02:57.20,	Where's my good girl?	我的小乖乖呢
03:01.22,	Gloria, is stella up there?	歌洛莉亚 斯黛拉在楼上吗
03:02.79,	No. But I am.	不在 但我在
03:05.43,	Why don't you say "hello" your wife when you come home?	你回家怎么不跟自己老婆打招呼呢
03:08.13,	Well, why don't you greet me at the door, wagging your tail?	那你怎么不在门口摇着尾巴迎接我呢
03:10.70,	Stella, honey! Where are you?	斯黛拉 宝贝 你在哪儿
03:13.75,	Stella!	斯黛拉
03:16.38,	My baby!	我的宝贝啊
03:18.32,	Stella, I'm coming! I'm coming!	斯黛拉 我来啦 我来啦
03:26.21,	You okay? You okay?	你没事吧 没事吧
03:29.06,	Why are you swimming in your clothes?	你怎么穿着衣服游泳啊
03:31.02,	Because I'm self-conscious about my body.	身材太差 不好意思穿泳裤出来秀
03:33.21,	Stella fell in the pool.	斯黛拉掉进池子里了
03:34.48,	It's my fault. I let her out,	都是我不好 我放她出来
03:36.55,	and then I got caught up in my couponing.	然后我忙着弄优惠券 走不开
03:38.71,	Any coupons for swim lessons?	有游泳课的优惠券吗
03:40.38,	Cause Stella needs some.	斯黛拉得学学
03:41.98,	Seriously? Manny you teach to swim	有没搞错啊 你教曼尼学游泳
03:43.92,	by throwing him in the pool,	就是把他扔水里自己扑腾
03:45.02,	but the dog gets swimming lessons?	却让狗去参加游泳班
03:47.66,	I gotta say, it was unpleasant but effective.	我得说 那么学虽然痛苦 但很有效
03:50.13,	We have to teach Stella how to swim.	我们必须教会斯黛拉游泳
03:51.66,	Otherwise, she could drown.	不然 她会淹死的
03:52.83,	Why don't you teach her not to jump in the pool?	你为啥不教她别往池子里跳呢
03:55.03,	She didn't jump in the pool. She fell in the pool.	她不是跳下去的 她是掉下去的
03:57.16,	Why, suddenly, would she jump in the pool	如果她不会游泳
03:58.95,	when she doesn't know how to swim?	怎么会突然跳进池子呢
04:00.07,	Why does she bark at the vacuum?	那她为什么冲着吸尘器叫呢
04:02.13,	It's a thing. It is never going to play with you.	吸尘器是个东西 永远不会跟你玩的
04:05.27,	Are you saying that Stella is stupid?	你是说斯黛拉蠢吗
04:07.44,	Are you covering her ears?	你这是捂着她耳朵吗
04:08.94,	Let's have a little compassion.	有点儿同情心好吧
04:10.44,	She's probably still traumatized from her near-death experience.	她刚死里逃生 还心有余悸呢
04:14.19,	Again? What's happening?!	又来了 搞什么啊
04:16.15,	Ay, no!	别
04:18.25,	Welcome, candidates. Mrs. Dunphy...	欢迎两位候选人 邓菲太太
04:20.55,	Thank you for having me.	感谢给我这个机会
04:21.95,	And councilman Bailey.	还有贝利议员
04:22.99,	Gosh, thank you so much, Alex.	谢谢你 艾丽克斯
04:24.19,	I'm deeply honored to be here,	很荣幸能站在这里
04:25.60,	and I remain, as ever, a humble servant	我将一如既往地为人民服务
04:28.15,	to the greatest little town	为我们最伟大的小镇
04:29.88,	in the greatest darn--	在这最棒的
04:31.49,	Eye-rolling.	翻白眼
04:33.30,	Playful eye rolling.	我翻着玩儿的
04:34.61,	How do we, as voters, know it's playful? I would avoid it.	我们选民哪会知道你是玩儿 我觉得这不好
04:37.74,	Okay. No eye rolling.	好 不翻白眼
04:40.42,	And don't purse your lips like that.	而且别这么抿嘴
04:41.65,	It makes you look annoyed.	看起来像生气了
04:44.69,	And don't touch your face.	而且别摸脸
04:45.62,	Yeah, no face touching. Seems nervous.	是啊 别摸脸 这样显得紧张
04:47.69,	Some of this is subjective.	你们这太主观了
04:50.96,	- What? What now? - Anger.	又怎么了-你发脾气了
04:52.37,	It looks like you're scolding us.	你似乎在指责我们
04:54.46,	I will keep my hands at my sides.	那我这么叉着腰吧
04:56.10,	Not on your hips. You're not superman.	别叉屁股上 你不是超人
04:58.47,	Can we get started?	我们能开始了吗
04:59.40,	We haven't started?	我们还没开始吗
05:00.54,	I've prepared some questions.	我准备了些问题
05:01.91,	Oh, goody! Actual questions.	哦 太好了 还真有问题
05:03.28,	- Honk. Sarcasm. - Just go.	-喇叭警告 讽刺 -赶紧提问吧
05:05.94,	Okay, Mrs. Dunphy,	好吧 邓菲夫人
05:07.18,	why are you running for local office?	您为什么要竞选镇议员呢
05:09.75,	Okay, that's, um, that's good.	好吧 那个 问得很好
05:11.15,	I... um, I--	我 那个 我
05:13.82,	Mom, you really shouldn't stutter	老妈 你应该把这些基本问题
05:15.09,	over a basic question like that.	准备得滚瓜烂熟才行
05:16.52,	You should at least know why you're running.	至少你得搞清自己竞选的理由
05:18.62,	I thought the moderator was supposed to be objective.	主持人不是应该持中立态度吗
05:20.77,	Not if she's the only one in the room	谁让我是这里唯一
05:22.04,	who has actual debate experience.	有过辩论经验的人
05:23.95,	Now why are you running?	再问一次 为什么参选
05:25.87,	I saw the need for a stop sign in--	我发现这个社区需要一个停车路标
05:27.76,	Liar!	骗子
05:28.46,	Phil!	菲尔
05:29.31,	I-I just think you should be ready for anything.	我觉得你要准备好应付各种突发状况
05:32.71,	I saw the need for a s--	我发现这个社区需要一个
05:33.97,	What?	怎么了
05:34.97,	Sorry. Accidental buzz.	不好意思 手滑了一下
05:36.94,	I saw the need for a stop sign in my neighborhood,	我发现这个社区需要一个停车路标
05:38.65,	and although I collected the necessary signatures	但即使我收集了必须的区民签名支持
05:40.50,	and did the paperwork, I found local government	并备齐了文件材料 我发现镇政府
05:42.85,	to be entirely unhelpful--	依然无视此事
05:44.52,	- When--what? - Too long. I'm bored.	-当我 又怎么了 -句子太长 让我觉得无聊
05:46.35,	Yeah, next question. I feel like I'm in school.	对 下个问题吧 感觉跟上课似的
05:50.02,	Some say the political system is bogged down	有人认为 我们的政治体制
05:52.20,	by ideological hard-liners	就是被一些思想强硬派的
05:54.08,	unwilling to compromise.	不妥协政策给拖了后腿
05:55.88,	How would you respond to that, councilman Bailey?	贝利议员 您如何回应这种说法
05:59.31,	I would like to use my lifeline.	我得求救了
06:03.01,	I'll take this.	我来回答
06:04.14,	If elected, I would consider all perspectives,	如果我当选 我会尊重各方观点
06:06.95,	and I would not ignore opposing viewpoints.	而且绝不会无视反对意见
06:11.01,	Helicopter. Just keep going.	救援直升机来了 你继续
06:12.55,	I would consider all perspectives,	我会尊重各方观点
06:14.55,	- and I wouldn't ignore opposing-- - You suck!	而且绝不会无视反对-下去吧
06:16.35,	Luke!	卢克
06:17.10,	You have to be ready for hecklers.	你得准备好应付起哄者
06:18.52,	He's right.	没错
06:20.05,	Okay. I'm doing over. No buzzing.	好的 从头再来 不准打断
06:22.47,	If elected, I--	如果我当选 我
06:24.92,	#NAME?	又怎么了-离麦克风太近了
06:26.62,	Phil, it's a hairbrush.	菲尔 这是个梳子
06:28.19,	Okay.	好吧
06:30.96,	If elected, I would consider all opinions	如果我当选 我会尊重各方观点
06:34.36,	and not ignore those of the opposition,	而且绝不会无视反对意见
06:36.50,	as councilman Bailey has done for six terms.	绝不会步贝利议员六届任期施政的后尘
06:40.20,	What? That was a great answer.	又怎么了 我回答得多棒
06:41.90,	Well, I couldn't hear it	好吧 我听不下去了
06:43.10,	because you were showing me the bad side of your face.	因为你把不好看的半边脸面向了观众
06:45.91,	I have a bad side?	我有半边脸不好看吗
06:47.22,	- Yeah, the left. - No. It's the right.	-对 左半边 -不对 是右半边
06:49.01,	Uh, dad, it's totally the left. I mean, look at it.	老爸 绝对是左半边好吧 你自己看看
06:51.04,	Sweetheart, why do you think I chose my side of the bed?	宝贝 我选择睡左边是有道理的
06:52.91,	Okay! Okay. Thank you.	好吧 谢谢你们了
06:54.54,	Thank you, family. This has been super-duper helpful.	谢谢我亲爱的家人们 你们真是帮了我一个"大忙"
06:57.22,	Hands, lips, sarcasm, eye-rolling,	手势 嘴唇 讽刺 翻白眼
06:59.35,	wrong side of the face.	不好看的半边脸
07:00.36,	Oh, yeah. Now I see it.	哦对 我发现了
07:02.90,	Yep.	就是左边
07:06.57,	She's ready.	她准备好了
07:08.70,	And it's this,	像这样
07:11.07,	and it's this.	像这样
07:13.04,	Not this,	不是这样
07:14.98,	but this.	是这样
07:16.75,	- Okay. Okay, that's good, Cam. -And this.	-好了 够了小卡 -还有这样
07:18.15,	Save--let's save some petals for Lily, all right?	留点 留点花瓣给女儿吧
07:20.48,	Okay. Let's do it over here, sweetheart.	好 乖女儿过来
07:21.88,	- Right over here. - Okay.	到这边来-好的
07:23.12,	There you go. Oh, like you're coming down the aisle!	对了 就像你走向婚礼的圣坛
07:26.96,	Not too many at once. That's good.	一次别洒太多 不错
07:28.39,	Okay. You're doing great, Lil.	很好 你做得很好 乖女儿
07:29.33,	Oh, she is, isn't she?	噢 她太棒了
07:30.73,	Forget the bride. All the eyes are gonna be on her.	谁看新娘啊 咱闺女才是瞩目的焦点
07:45.50,	I cannot believe you laughed!	我不敢相信你居然笑出来了
07:47.24,	I am sorry. But you know I have two weaknesses--	抱歉 但你知道我有两个软肋笑点
07:49.78,	children cursing and old people rapping.	小孩爆粗口 老人唱饶舌
07:52.02,	Cam, we have to tell her it's a bad word.	小卡 我们得告诉她那词不好
07:53.82,	No. That just gives it more power.	不行 那样只会让她觉得那词很劲爆
07:55.82,	The less we make of it, the better.	我们越不提起这事越好
07:57.82,	Let's just pretend like it never happened.	我们就装作什么都没发生
07:59.42,	Okay. Yeah, maybe it-- maybe it didn't.	好吧 或许 或许什么都没发生
08:01.09,	Maybe we--maybe we misheard.	或许是我们听错了
08:02.89,	Yeah. Maybe she said "Truck."	对 或许她说的是"卡"
08:05.23,	Or--or "Duck."	或者"擦"
08:06.60,	Or "Luck." She could have said "Yuck."	或者"菜" 她有可能说的是"草"
08:09.40,	Daddy, can I have some ice cream?	爸爸 我能吃冰淇淋吗
08:11.17,	No, honey, if you're hungry, you can have some fruit.	不 宝贝儿 如果你饿了 可以吃点水果
08:13.67,	Fruit? .	水果
08:17.87,	I have two children.	我有俩孩子要教育啊
08:27.26,	Phil? Phil, is this televised?	菲尔 这是要上电视吗
08:29.63,	I didn't tell you because I didn't want to make you nervous.	我没告诉你是不想让你紧张
08:31.83,	Great plan. Really good plan.	好主意 真是个好主意啊
08:33.56,	Throw me for a curveball at the last minute.	最后时刻 给我来个措手不及
08:35.06,	Mom, chill. It's just public access.	别紧张妈 只是公共频道
08:36.80,	My debate team's on public access,	我们的辩论赛也上公共频道
08:38.57,	and the only people who watch me are you guys.	只有你们才会看而已
08:40.74,	Yep. All the time.	对 每次都看
08:41.97,	So maybe nobody will see this?	所以或许没人会看这个
08:43.50,	No. We want people to see this.	不 我们想让大家看到这个
08:45.30,	That's how you win elections. That's the whole point.	这样你才能当选 被人熟知才是关键
08:48.08,	Then mom should do something so crazy and stupid.	那老妈应该做些疯狂愚蠢的事
08:50.69,	- It goes viral. - Mom, please don't go viral.	可以做网络红人-妈 千万别做网络红人
08:53.03,	Okay. I'll add that to my list of things not to do--	好的 我会把这个加进严禁事宜中
08:55.20,	Don't touch my face, don't roll my eyes,	别碰脸 别翻白眼
08:57.73,	don't point my fingers,	别"指"点江山
08:59.10,	and definitely don't go viral.	还有绝对不做网络红人
09:00.70,	Do any of you still believe in me?	你们还有谁对我有点信心的
09:02.45,	Of course we do. We're on your side.	我们当然相信你 我们站在你这边
09:04.44,	The right side.	是右半边
09:05.95,	Not the left.	不是左边
09:07.01,	Let's grab a seat.	我们去找个座位
09:10.62,	Right. Left.	右边 左边
09:11.82,	Okay. Mom, just be confident.	好了 妈 要有自信
09:14.19,	Based on what? I just lost a debate in my living room,	凭什么 自家客厅的辩论我都输了
09:16.42,	and people think I'm unlikable.	而且大家觉得我讨人嫌
09:18.26,	That's just the word men use for powerful women	那是男人针对女强人的专用词
09:19.69,	because they feel threatened.	因为他们感觉受到威胁
09:21.06,	So just forget everything else and be proud and powerful.	所以忘掉一切 强势不屈 舍我其谁
09:25.30,	How did you get so smart?	你怎么这么聪明
09:26.73,	I've always assumed adoption or baby switch.	可能我是领养的 或是在医院抱错了
09:28.73,	Hey. Hey. No kisses!	注意 不能亲吻
09:31.16,	Proud and powerful.	强势不屈 舍我其谁
09:32.01,	#NAME?	抱歉-也不能道歉
09:33.90,	Yes! Shut up and get in there!	对 闭嘴 赶紧进去
09:35.88,	That's more like it!	就要这个范儿
09:37.51,	Yeah!	对
09:39.68,	Oh, god.	天哪
09:43.41,	There she is.	她来了
09:44.15,	- Go get 'em, Claire. -Thanks.	-搞定他们 克莱尔 -多谢支持
09:46.02,	Don't worry. We're going to cheer for you	别担心 我们会给你助威的
09:47.16,	no matter what you say.	不管你说了什么
09:48.39,	Oh, good. More support from my loving family.	真好 来自亲爱家人的更多"支持"
09:50.96,	Honk. Sarcasm.	喇叭警告 讽刺
09:53.37,	Why'd you bring Stella?	你怎么把斯黛拉带来了
09:54.67,	She keeps getting out and jumping in the pool.	她总是往屋外跑 然后往泳池里跳
09:56.79,	We don't wanna take any chances because she can't swim.	我们可不能冒险把她留在家里 她不会游泳
09:59.30,	Then why does she keep jumping in the pool?	那她为啥还老往泳池里跳
10:01.03,	I've been thinking about it. I got a theory.	我一直在想这个问题 我有个想法
10:02.46,	She might be suicidal.	她可能有自杀倾向
10:04.52,	What? That's crazy.	什么 这也太疯狂了吧
10:06.69,	There's not such thing as doggy suicide.	这世上就没什么狗狗自杀一说
10:09.96,	Hi. Duane Bailey.	你好 我是杜恩·贝利
10:12.21,	Sorry. I couldn't help but overhear.	抱歉 我无意中听到你们谈话
10:13.87,	In addition to being a public servant,	我除了是人民公仆之外
10:15.53,	I'm also an award-winning breeder of puggles.	还是一名获奖哈巴小猎犬饲养者
10:18.30,	I've won the Puggly. Twice.	我赢过最佳猎犬奖 两次哟
10:20.47,	And I'm afraid that doggy suicide	我恐怕狗狗自杀是
10:22.04,	is all too real.	确有其事的
10:23.85,	It's just the mainstream media doesn't report on it,	只不过主流媒体不报道罢了
10:26.48,	cause it's not as sexy as feline A.I.D.S.	因为不像猫艾滋那么火爆
10:29.00,	Stella is not suicidal. She's just... estupid.	斯黛拉没有自杀倾向 她就是比较脑残
10:32.34,	Well, that might be part of your problem.	那 或许就是您的问题了
10:34.28,	She senses you don't like her.	她能感觉到你不喜欢她
10:35.65,	You have no idea.	你根本想不到
10:36.78,	This one's been against this little angel	从这个小天使踏进我们家门起
10:38.45,	from the very beginning.	这位就没消停过
10:39.79,	Yeah, well, dogs pick up on that.	没错 狗狗会注意到的
10:41.09,	You know, they're very sensitive.	他们很敏感的
10:42.36,	I like to call them, um...	我喜欢叫他们
10:44.59,	Bottomless pits of need.	填不满的情感无底洞
10:46.73,	But not to their face, though.	但不能当他们的面说
10:47.96,	That would just destroy them.	那样太伤他们感情了
10:49.06,	Not you.	不是说你哟
10:50.73,	So now this is my fault?	那这么说是我的错啦
10:52.00,	I think he knows what he's talking about.	我想他知道自己在说什么
10:52.94,	The man won a puggly.	人家可是赢过一个最佳猎犬奖的
10:54.24,	- Two. I won two pugglies. - We're done here.	-两个 我赢过两个 -我们说完了
10:56.01,	- In 2000- - Yeah.	在2000年和-是是
10:59.27,	Do you have any idea what station this is on?	你知道是哪个台播吗
11:01.81,	Here, I'll look online.	我上网查查[上网看
11:02.77,	It's a webcast? That would have been helpful to know	是网络广播吗 你早点说我就不用
11:04.67,	900 channels ago.	摁过九百个频道了
11:05.69,	No, it's on public access or something.	不是 是个公共频道之类的
11:07.77,	I wanna watch aunt claire!	我要看克莱尔姑妈
11:09.38,	Okay. Well, first, honey, we need to talk about something.	行 但是首先 宝贝 我们得谈谈
11:11.78,	It's about that word you said this morning.	关于你早上说的那个词
11:14.21,	What word?	什么词
11:15.08,	You know, the one that starts with "F"?	你知道 就是那个以F开头的那个词
11:17.11,	- "Flower"? - No.	花花-不是
11:19.91,	- "Fruit"? - No.	果果-不是
11:21.30,	If she doesn't remember it, we shouldn't remind her.	如果她记不起来了 我们干嘛要提醒她
11:23.48,	Oh, well, she said it three times.	因为她说了三遍呢
11:25.07,	Oh, you mean.	哦 你是说
11:28.04,	Cam, leave the room!	小卡 出去
11:30.90,	No. I can do this.	不用 我能忍住
11:33.70,	Lily, that is a bad word,	莉莉 那是个不好的词
11:36.20,	and you are not allowed to say it ever.	而且你永远也不能再说这个词
11:38.56,	But it makes you laugh.	但能把你逗笑呀
11:40.04,	Okay, well, daddy shouldn't be laughing,	其实爸爸不应该笑的
11:41.41,	and you should never say that word.	你也永远不应该说那个词
11:44.05,	Do you understand?	明白没
11:45.20,	Maybe.	或许吧
11:47.32,	Okay. This is not a game, all right?	好吧 这可不是什么游戏 好吗
11:49.89,	If you say that word one more time,	如果你再说一遍那个词
11:50.96,	I'm gonna take away all your toys!	我就把你的玩具都没收
11:52.26,	I'm serious! She knows I'm not serious.	我认真的 她知道我不是认真的
11:54.33,	What about the wedding?	那婚礼怎么办
11:56.16,	What if she says it there?	如果她在那说怎么办
11:57.63,	She's like a ticking time bomb!	她就像是个定时炸弹
11:58.87,	-Well, what are we gonna do, cancel? - Yes.	-那我们怎么办 取消吗 -没错
12:00.74,	Maybe we just call and say,	我们就这么说
12:01.80,	We're not going to any more weddings until the gays can get married.	在同性婚姻合法化之前 我们不参加任何婚礼
12:04.34,	Oh, so now we're political?	得 咱们改走政治路线了
12:05.44,	We leave town on gay pride weekend	连"同志骄傲"游行周我们都躲出去避难
12:06.98,	because we don't like the traffic.	就因为不喜欢那拥挤的交通
12:10.99,	But there's no substitute for experience.	但是经验的作用是无可替代的
12:15.98,	For example, I doubt my opponent is familiar	举例来说 我怀疑我的对手
12:18.33,	with town ordinance 26-12b...	是否熟悉镇法26-12b
12:21.08,	26-12b has to do with noise pollution--	26-12b是关于噪声污染的
12:23.72,	Something, sir, that you are guilty of right now.	也就是您 先生 现在正造出的哟
12:27.32,	Oh, no she di'int!	她怎么这么牛掰
12:29.34,	Go, mom!	加油 老妈
12:30.16,	Ladies and gentlemen...	女士们先生们
12:31.20,	Look at her eyes.	看看她的眼睛
12:31.92,	I know. They're a little too close together.	看出来了 确实有点斗鸡眼
12:33.89,	It's been bugging me for years.	我已经纠结很多年了
12:35.50,	No, she's in the zone.	不是 她现在状态正佳
12:37.17,	She's ready for anything.	她已经万事俱备了
12:38.23,	I do like to talk... about the issues.	我是很想谈谈 谈谈问题
12:41.03,	Speaking of issues,	说起问题哈
12:42.34,	your husband seems to have some.	您先生好像有一些问题
12:45.71,	I'm sorry?	抱歉
12:46.74,	I'm not sorry. What?	我不是在致歉 什么
12:49.28,	Oh, well, I wouldn't want to bring it up,	其实 我本不愿提起的
12:51.35,	but since you asked, um...	不过既然你问了
12:53.03,	In february of last year, your husband,	在去年的二月份 您先生
12:55.19,	one, uh, Phillip Dunphy, was questioned at a local hotel	菲利普·邓菲 因为猥亵和淫荡行为
12:59.71,	for lewd and lascivious conduct.	在一家本地酒店被问话
13:02.94,	Oh, jeez.	老天
13:04.70,	That's not true.	没这回事
13:05.70,	Ma'am, according to this police report,	夫人 根据这份警方报告
13:07.45,	he, uh, broke into a stranger's room,	他 闯进陌生人的房间
13:10.05,	stripped naked...	全裸的
13:11.89,	and then posed provocatively on the bed.	在床上摆出极为挑逗性的姿势
13:17.40,	That is technically true,	外在现象大致如此
13:19.85,	but in all fairness, it was valentine's day.	但是公平地说 那天是情人节
13:22.65,	Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry. It was valentine's day.	抱歉 那天是情人节呀
13:25.62,	I'm not sure, uh,	我不太清楚
13:26.69,	if your husband was born in this country.	您先生是不是生在这个国家
13:28.32,	Perhaps he snuck in illegally,	也许他是非法移民吧
13:30.02,	but here in America, we celebrate valentine's day	但是在美国呢 我们在情人节这天
13:32.53,	with chocolates,	送人巧克力
13:34.10,	not our private parts.	不是送人小鸡鸡
13:38.47,	This is my new favorite show.	这是我现在最爱的节目了
13:40.33,	No, sir,	不是的 先生
13:41.54,	he was looking for me, his wife,	他那时是在找我 他的妻子
13:43.88,	and he walked into the wrong room.	但是他走错了房间
13:45.98,	If you believe that,	如果你们相信的话
13:46.83,	I have some talking puggles I'd like to sell you.	我有些会说话的哈巴小猎犬 很乐意卖给你们
13:50.11,	Do you believe this?	你相信吗
13:51.65,	Talking dogs? I'm skeptical.	会说话的狗 我很怀疑
13:54.02,	- I won the puggly. Twice. - Be strong.	-我赢过最佳猎犬奖 两次 -强硬
13:57.11,	I am glad that my opponent brought this up,	我很高兴我的对手提起这事
13:58.97,	as I feel that it speaks to his character	此事正好可以看出他的下三滥品格
14:02.16,	more than mine.	而我身正不怕影斜
14:04.21,	I think that we should raise the level of discourse	我认为现在应该把讨论提升一个档次
14:07.01,	and get back to the issues	回到那些我们的选民
14:08.43,	that the voters really care about.	真正关心的问题上来
14:09.96,	When he was naked, what were you wearing?	当他裸着的时候 你穿的什么
14:12.05,	I... don't think that's relevant.	我 我认为这与本次辩论无关
14:14.38,	Are you sex freaks?	你是性变态吗
14:15.88,	My personal life has nothing to do with this.	我的个人生活和这次辩论毫无关系
14:19.62,	Uh--the--my opponent has brought this up	我的对手提起这事就是为了
14:23.52,	to distract from his own record,	把公众注意力从他的政绩上转移
14:25.93,	which shows that in--in six years,	因为他在六年的时间里
14:28.36,	he has achieved nothing more than writing one ordinance	除了制定一项"允许私人派对上
14:31.30,	that allows private parties to have more than eight dogs.	出现八条以上的狗"的条令之外一无所成
14:35.84,	It's like watching the "Hindenburg."	简直就跟目睹兴登堡惨案一样
14:37.70,	This is the most horrible thing I've ever seen in my life.	这是我这辈子见过的最悲惨的事情了
14:39.87,	- Excuse me! - Stand by.	抱歉-还有更惨的
14:42.01,	I am Phil Dunphy, and I am not a pervert.	我就是菲尔·邓菲 而且我不是变态
14:44.85,	I, like a lot of men in this town,	我 和这镇子里很多的男士一样
14:48.58,	enjoy making love to my wife.	喜欢和我老婆滚床单
14:53.04,	I mean, um... I mean with their wives.	我是说 和他们各自的老婆滚
14:55.68,	Not me, them.	各滚各的
14:57.88,	Look, I should probably just sit down and say nothing.	听着 或许我应该只是坐在那里默不作声
15:01.31,	But it's too late.	但是为时已晚
15:02.14,	I am standing, and I'm obviously talking,	我已经站起来了 很显然我也在说话
15:04.48,	and now you're looking at me,	而现在你们也都盯着我看
15:06.28,	and I feel the need to keep going.	我就感觉我应该继续说下去
15:08.85,	First of all...	首先一点
15:11.52,	no charges were filed.	没有书面的正式起诉
15:13.03,	Everyone had a good laugh--	大家一笑而过
15:15.36,	about the situation, not--not about me.	觉得挺滑稽 不是说笑话我
15:17.70,	Everything's fine down there.	我"硬件"正常得很
15:20.13,	Anywho...	总之
15:22.71,	Where were we?	说到哪了
15:23.88,	All over YouTube.	红遍了YouTube啊
15:25.71,	We went viral.	还是做了网络红人
15:27.07,	Some sick bastard auto-tuned me.	不知道哪个狗杂种给我弄了个电音版
15:29.94,	I...	俺
15:30.66,	like a lot of men	和这镇子里
15:31.98,	in this town	很多的男士一样
15:33.04,	I enjoy making love to my wife--wife	喜欢和我老婆滚床单 滚呀么滚床单
15:37.81,	And I don't know how to stop.	滚到天昏地暗不停歇
15:41.30,	I am a pervert.	我性放荡呀
15:42.30,	Pervert--per--	浪里个荡
15:44.47,	Jay! Manny!	杰 曼尼
15:46.68,	We should have been there already!	我们早就该到那了
15:48.68,	Gloria, I'm tying my tie!	歌洛莉亚 我正系领带呢
15:51.35,	I'm accessorizing!	我穿戴搭配呢
15:53.39,	And I thought I was the woman.	比女人打扮的时间还久
16:00.84,	The door.	忘关门了
16:02.10,	Ay! Estella, no! No!	喂 斯黛拉 别啊
16:04.60,	Ay! No! No!	别啊 别动
16:06.01,	Estella, don't do it! Don't kill yourself!	斯黛拉 别想不开 别自寻短见啊
16:08.44,	You are a perfectly fine dog!	你是个超级棒的狗狗
16:09.91,	I don't hate you!	我不讨厌你
16:11.64,	Estella, okay, I was a little mean to you,	斯黛拉 好吧 我对你是有点刻薄
16:13.91,	but that's no reason to kill yourself!	但你也不至于寻死啊
16:15.62,	You are young!	小年轻啊
16:16.72,	You still have so much left to smell!	花花世界还有很多"闻"所未"闻"呢
16:19.88,	Ay!	不
16:20.73,	I am--I go!	我 我来了
16:22.46,	I'm coming!	等着我
16:24.30,	I'm--Manny!	我 曼尼
16:25.66,	Ay! Come on, Estella!	坚持住 斯黛拉
16:29.67,	- What happened? - Are you okay?	咋回事-你还好吗
16:31.59,	She did it again.	她又跳了
16:33.10,	- And you jumped in to save her? - No, Jay!	然后你湿身救它了-不是啊
16:35.14,	I wanted to take a little swim before going to the wedding!	我就是赶在婚礼前小游一下啊
16:38.03,	Get her a towel. She's shaking like a leaf.	给她条浴巾 冻得直哆嗦
16:46.59,	Oh, no, no, I meant--	不不不 我意思是
16:47.79,	- I meant-- - Thank you, Jay.	您请用-谢你八辈儿祖宗
16:49.49,	The dog towel for me.	我就配条狗浴巾
16:52.64,	For the wife.	我可是你老婆啊
16:58.34,	Hi!	你们好
16:58.88,	Hey, guys. Hi.	你们好啊
17:00.68,	Hi. Hey, what's shaking? What's cooking?	好啊 有啥新鲜事没
17:03.01,	You saw the debate, didn't you?	你们看了辩论了吧
17:04.23,	The de-what? No, that wasn't--	辩啥 那不是在
17:05.76,	That was today? No, no. Was that on today?	今天吗 是今天吧
17:07.09,	Oh, I didn't remember.	我忘了
17:08.13,	You are the worst liars.	扯谎也下点功夫好吗
17:10.27,	It was phenomenal television.	辩论实在太精彩了
17:11.93,	Oh, Lily.	莉莉
17:13.82,	What a...	多么那啥的
17:15.22,	Dress.	裙子啊
17:16.01,	Oh, well, you ain't seen nothing yet.	这才哪儿跟哪儿啊
17:19.92,	How about there... we go.	开开眼 走着
17:23.09,	Yikes. She looks like a lite brite.	我去 跟"点阵画图"似的
17:25.21,	Luke, honey.	卢克 亲爱的
17:26.63,	Lily, sweetie, are you excited to be a flower girl?	莉莉宝贝儿 做花童兴奋吗
17:28.73,	Yeah?	是吧
17:30.47,	Little bit nervous?	有点小紧张
17:31.67,	Yeah?	是吧
17:33.30,	Why isn't she talking to me? Did she see the debate, too?	她为什么不理我 她也看了辩论是吧
17:36.03,	Nope, she's on verbal lockdown.	没 她被封口了
17:37.70,	- Oh? - She's been dropping a certain curse word all day.	咋了-她整天嘴里都吧唧一个脏字
17:40.65,	Mm. Yeah. Yeah, so we're just hoping	就是这情况 我们希望她
17:42.00,	the next one doesn't happen during the wedding.	别在婚礼上口无遮拦
17:43.88,	If it does, it'll be the second most embarrassing thing	要是没拦住 她就是咱家今天
17:45.91,	to happen to our family today.	丢死人不偿命的"二小姐"了
17:47.39,	Phil, you said it wasn't that bad.	菲尔 你说没那么糟糕的
17:49.22,	That was in the car. We're in a church now.	车上满嘴谎言安慰你 教堂里不敢说假话
17:51.02,	Honey...	亲爱的
17:52.85,	Somebody turn her off. I think I'm having a seizure.	来个人把她"灭"了吧 慎得慌
17:55.02,	Oh, buddy.	可怜孩子
17:59.25,	Oh, good. I thought that we were going to miss Lily.	还好 还以为会看不到莉莉登场呢
18:01.66,	Ships at sea wouldn't miss Lily. Where have you guys been?	海船都能看到她这座灯塔 你们去哪儿了
18:05.19,	I had to jump in the pool to save the stupid dog...	我跳进泳池里救那条傻狗
18:07.66,	Who she loves.	她爱得深沉
18:09.13,	That I didn't let her down doesn't mean that I love her.	救了她不代表我爱她
18:11.93,	I barely got Manny back in the pool	负鼠事件后我都很少
18:13.94,	after that possum incident.	让曼尼下水了
18:15.91,	I thought it drowned,	我以为它溺水了
18:17.17,	but turns out it was just playing possum.	但结果负鼠只是诈死
18:19.57,	Yes, papi.	没错 宝贝
18:32.42,	Good job!	好样的
18:42.88,	You know what the worst part of today was?	知道今天最失败的是哪部分吗
18:45.39,	I imagine it's hard to choose.	都很失败 好难选择啊
18:46.81,	When everything was melting down,	那就是当一切一点点搞砸时
18:48.29,	I realized I had an answer to your question,	我终于想到你问题的答案了
18:50.58,	why I was running.	为什么竞选那题
18:52.12,	I wanted to make my family proud,	我想要一家子为我骄傲
18:54.00,	and I did the exact opposite.	不想却给家里抹了黑
18:56.10,	No.	才不是
18:57.18,	No, I did. I totally embarrassed you.	就是 我让你们颜面扫地了
18:59.37,	No. No, dad embarrassed me.	真的不是 老爸才丢人
19:01.27,	I was proud of you.	我挺为你骄傲的
19:03.83,	I think it's cool you're running for local office.	我特佩服你去参加竞选
19:05.97,	I mean, it's totally nerdy, and that's kind of my thing.	虽然有点呆气 但我就喜欢那样的你
19:09.35,	Hmm. Maybe it's kind of our thing.	或许我们娘俩都一样
19:21.05,	Ah. Some day, I'll walk you down the aisle.	总有一天 我会挽着你走过红毯
19:24.11,	If you're not in perv jail.	只要你没"浪"入班房
19:28.27,	Please be seated.	请各位就座
19:33.18,	Friends, family, thank you for making...	朋友们 亲人们 谢谢大家前来...
19:36.71,	Really?	不是吧你
19:37.35,	Well, you know I cry at weddings.	我逢婚必哭的
19:39.48,	Oh, no.	别啊
19:40.99,	- What? - Stop--stop crying.	怎么了-把眼泪咽进肚子里
19:43.25,	Well, just because you have ice water in your veins,	你自己蛇蝎冷血 空洞无情
19:44.68,	- doesn't mean that-- - No. No, Lily...	不代表...-别 别 莉莉
19:46.53,	No. Lily...	打住 莉莉
19:48.01,	He's fine. Daddy's fine.	他好着呢 爸爸好着呢
19:49.38,	- Daddy's not sad. - Daddy, daddy!	爸爸高兴着呢-爸爸 爸爸
20:04.03,	You see? I told you it was funny.	看见没 我说很搞笑的吧
20:12.47,	Excuse us.	对不住了
20:14.27,	Congratulations.	恭喜你们
20:20.37,	There. That ought to do it.. Go on, you little motorboat!	应该没问题了 冲吧 像小汽艇一样
20:26.04,	Look at her go!	游得多欢啊
20:29.03,	Where's she going?	她去哪儿
20:30.30,	Oh, jeez, I think she's trying to get herself	天呐 她不是要把自己塞进
20:31.78,	sucked into the filter.	过滤器里吧
20:32.89,	What'd you say to her?	你又说什么刺激她了
20:34.48,	I didn't say anything!	我什么都没说啊
20:36.01,	Wait a second.	等等
20:38.02,	Jay, look.	杰 你瞧
20:40.52,	See? She was not trying to kill herself.	看吧 她没有想自寻短见
20:43.37,	She was just trying to get to the squeaky wiener!	她只是想去拿小捏捏来着
20:46.41,	That must be why she's been jumping in.	这可以解释她的几连跳了
20:47.65,	It must have been there all the time. That's hilarious!	那玩意儿肯定一直在那 真逗
20:50.05,	Ay, si!	是啊
20:51.41,	No, it's not!	逗你个头
20:52.78,	Not now.	现在看不逗
20:54.47,	I'm saying it will be.	将来再看就逗了
20:56.88,	Later.	将来